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Herpes 2

Can you have a normal relationship having herpes 2? I feel embarrassed about having sex with him .My husband noticed an outbreak on my butt on the left side and I went to the doctor to do a physical and it came back positive… I was diagnosed since 2019 about having herpes 2 but never had an outbreak until now and I decided to spoke about it with him , I mean I had to , I been feeling bad since then and weird about it , he was in shock and tell me not to worry about it but I feel bad… I had my second outbreak this year the fist one I did a blood test and it came back negative but I’m sure it was herpes , I had same symptoms now … I  have outbreaksIn my Butt … do people have outbreaks at the same spot or it can spread in different places ?  I mean it’s my second time in the same spot . I didn’t have anything in my genital in looked normal , the doctor told me I can have sex as long as he doesn’t touch the effected area .. but it’s too ricky .. I rather wait to be heal ,I’m using medication and it got better but still healing . I have been with my husband since 10 years and we separated once for almost a year and after that I came back positive , I told him to test himself but he said if I have that , he probably have it , so what’s the point of it!! And also he has herpes 1 since he was born,sometimes he would have outbreaks in his nose because of stress.
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207091 tn?1337709493
COMMUNITY LEADER
So I'm going to approach this in two ways - as if your husband has it, and if he doesn't.

If he already has it, nothing changes for you. If you have outbreaks on your butt, and it doesn't physically hurt you to have sex during outbreaks, then go for it.

If he doesn't have it, having sex during an outbreak increases the chances that he'll get it, even if your outbreak is on your butt. Since your infection is genital that presents with outbreaks on your butt, you will shed the virus from your genitals. You shed more during an outbreak.

Apparently, your husband doesn't care. He thinks he has it, and he might. He might not.

If he doesn't have it, and gets it, nothing will change.

If he doesn't have it, and all you do is avoid sex when you have symptoms, the chances that he'd get it from you are about 4% a year. If you take daily antivirals to help reduce shedding and outbreaks OR use condoms, it's 2% a year. If you do both, it's 1%.

As to the spreading, you could get an outbreak in the genital area at any time. It's common to continue to get them in the same place, but that could change, too.

You should read the Herpes Handbook at https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/  It's free, and written by Terri Warren, one of the world's leading experts on herpes. You can read it on any device.

I'd also urge you to remember that your husband is a grown man who can make his own decisions regarding his health. If he's good with it, you might want to follow his lead on that. I don't know him, obviously, but on this at least, he sounds like a great guy.  

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Thank you for the respond.. yes he is an special person , no complains about that.. i been feeling a little down since my first outbreak,but I have to learn to live with that. Once again thank you !
You're welcome! Give yourself a little time to come to terms with it, but don't dwell on it. It doesn't change who you are, or what your relationship is. :)
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