Hmm... I'm looking for the right balance between sensitive education and outragious indignation over your comments. I'll give it a try.
You clearly are alarmed and frightened, which I understand. But you also are insensitive and, frankly, ignorant.
There is absolutely no risk of infection because you are the roommate of someone with oral herpes. Herpes, either oral or genital, is not transmitted by shared eating utensils, cups, towels, etc. Further, half of all adults in the US (more or less in other countries) have oral HSV1 infections. (There's a 50% chance you have it yourself, whether or not you have had symptoms of oral herpes.) In other words, half of all the people you have ever been friends with, shared meals with, shaken hands with, etc, etc also are infected. The only difference here is that your roommate has told you about her infection.
Washing dishes: You don't need a dishwasher. You could disregard dishwashing entirely; you won't be at risk.
How to avoid spreading to you? Don't kiss or have oral sex with your roommate when she is having an outbreak.
What should you do? Apologize to your rooommate for your overreaction; stop worrying; and go about your life as normal.
Well said Howard. Well said.