i found out in February or march last year (i was only 16) i only received oral sex from him. i spent over a week in the most excruciating pain of my life and eventually went to my local clinic for 21 year olds and under. i got tested and found out i had it. ive avoided him ever since and never told him i got it from him. ive done barely anything with any guys since because i just mentally cant get past this. although i know its not as big a deal as i once thought it was, others dont. i cant get close to a guy because i know i will have to tell them and i know people will run far from me when they find out. im sure anyone would rather be with someone who doesn't have it rather than someone who does. recently my friend fund out the girl she was getting with had it and told all of our friend group. and when the girl who has it came near us another friend whispered "when i see hr all i think is herpes, dont you? haha" and it freaked me out so much. i know that you can have herpes for years and never know about it (like not have an outbreak for years and then find out) so cant i just lie and if they get it say that they must have got it from someone before me? i know t is illegal in many states but i live in england so im not as sure about the laws. i just wish it would go away but thats never gonna happen.