Avatar universal

How to stop worrying about things outside my control?

Something happened.  Won’t know the outcome for several months. It could be that I will find out bad news in a month. But won’t know if there is nothing to worry about for at least six months. Worrying will not change the past or the future outcome. There is nothing I can do. But yet I seem to be punishing myself mentally. I am miserable. I do not know what to do. I wish there was something I could tell myself to just let it go and move on. At present I just try to sleep through the day so I don’t think about it - I don’t think this is good. I wish I could block it out of my mind,
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13167 tn?1327194124
OP,  it's hard to imagine what you're talking about that certain areas deal with in one therapy session but no one near you can deal with it.  Can you be more specific?

In general,  though,  here are successful ways to deal with anxiety.

Make a list of EVERYTHING you can do to help the situation,  and if there is truly nothing,  then there's nothing to do.  Be done with that phase.

Since you're imagining an outcome that hasn't happened yet,  imagine it turning out great.  Think of the best outcome,  and then the second best outcome.  Tell yourself you're really looking forward to the outcome of finding out you don't have a tumor,  or whatever the preferred outcome is.   Since you're making up a situation,  you may as well make up a positive one rathe than a negative one.

Next,  plan a time to worry.  Say,  3 to 3:15 p.m.  When the thought crosses your mind about this situation,  say nope,  it's not 3 o'clock yet,  not time to worry.  Then,  at 3 p.m.,  sit somewhere quiet and think about it,  and worry.    Repeat this tomorrow.  You'll train your brain to ignore it when the thought crosses your mind.  

Best wishes.  Anxiety and worry is horrible.

Helpful - 1
Avatar universal
I feel so so hard for you. I do this exact same thing and..it's hard. This definitely sounds like anxiety and even perfectionism issues. I have ADHD and anxiety, as well as some other mental health disorders. So, oftentimes I blame myself when things start to go wrong and when I don't know the outcome of something I'll stress myself out to the point of sickness. I often have to know EVERYTHING about a situation and when I don't I tend to freak out. The funny part is--I'm not a control freak. I'm very laidback when it comes to friendships and relationships. However, I'm very protective. A guy did some horrible things to my friend and we'll just say it didn't end up well for him. That situation I needed control because someone I care about was hurt and traumatized deeply..it just depends on the situation. I definitely think you'd benefit from therapy. There are online therapy resources that you do have to pay for but are definitely worth it in the long run. If you have any other questions please ask! I'm happy to help.
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
You sound like you are going down the path of dysfunctional thinking that is rooted in your anxiety.  I'd try to find online support for anxiety through therapy or written/video resources about how to reframe your thinking.  Most likely, the event you are so worried about is something others are telling you is unrealistic.  But your anxiety disallows you from accepting it. And your anxious brain causes you to continue to ask for reassurance over and over and over again.  No amount of logic or rational thinking will actually help because your anxiety is clouding your thinking. So, first thing to do is remind yourself that this is anxiety. Then reframe your thinking.  "Most likely, worse case scenario will not happen."  "I have done everything I can and all should be well." Activate your brain to do something actually productive rather than ruminating and worrying. Exercise. Seek medical care for anxiety as it is a medical condition that can be treated with therapy (CBT, DBT) and medication if necessary.  But no one should continue to allow you to harbor the irrational anxiety by reassuring you.  You have to begin reassuring yourself that all will be alright and in reading your other posts, it will be. Take care.
Helpful - 0
There is nothing wrong with your suggestion , it is perfectly valid. As for my situation the problem is that there is no qualified person I can consult to deal with the issue. While the issue is something that would easily be discussed and analysed by a qualified person in a single sitting and be done with , in my location the persons I have consulted are not well qualified and all appear to be giving contradictory information. In fact, the issue is so common in most countries it is a non-issue since professionals in those countries deal with it in a single sitting. Unfortunately in my location, I do not have access to such professionals, so the matter is unresolved.

As a result, instead of being able to put the matter aside, the matter remains in my head each time I receive contradictory information.
I'm speaking of resources online to handle your anxiety.  There are many.  You may need to use translate but here are some. https://psychcentral.com/lib/stop-irrational-thoughts  For DBT, which you use for coping and distress tolerance. https://sunrisertc.com/distress-tolerance-skills/ and this may help as well. https://www.betterup.com/blog/worry

You clearly use your computer but you are unwilling to use it productively.  Rumination and worry is like that.  You just want answers to your other question but this forum is for mental health.  That's what we talk about here. Your other issues? Well, you had 'someone' prescribe your medication. Talk to them or their office or that clinic about your questions.  

but you need to thin about how your overall mental health is impacting this and get ahold of that.
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