Mental Health Issues Community
267 Members
973741 tn?1342342773

Little Things bothering you?

All those little things your loved ones do, do they bother you?  How do you get past that so you aren't picking at someone all the time?  
2 Responses
Avatar universal
I think some of how much stuff bothers us is our own point in our lives.  The more life in general is bothering us the more others bother us.  When we're at peace with our lives, we often don't notice this stuff at all.  On the other hand, we all have habits and behaviors that are truly annoying and everyone would be happier if we just stopped doing them.  What my wife and I do is dig at one another until we hit a sore spot and then we get mad and then we yell and then we hate each other and then time passes and in our relationship I'm the one who is the peacemaker, my wife would be just as happy with nobody else in her life at all.  So I guess part of it is, the more adaptable person has to just accept the annoying parts of the other person.  I think most humans are pretty full of disgusting and annoying behaviors, and we get along by mostly just ignoring them.  The more we focus on them the more they bother us.  Acceptance goes a long way, and if the behavior is truly unacceptable, it has to be confronted, which leads to a fight, which leads to time passing, until it happens again.  Which is no help at all but that's life.
I think there's a lot of truth to "when we're at peace with our lives, we often don't notice this stuff at all". I have a family member who is the biggest nit picker ever, and she's the most unhappy person I know.

Of course, being cooped up with people all the time isn't helping a thing, but are you getting out of the house? Are you taking walks? Getting away from everything as much as is possible? Put your mask on and go for a walk for an hour.

Something I have to remind myself of OFTEN is that I can't control others, I can only control my reactions to them. That's way easier said than done, obviously, and some days, I'm sort of successful at that. Others, not so much.

Use the apps you've been recommending, get therapy if you need it (and I think by the end of this, we're all going to need it), make sure you are getting as much alone time as you can. I'm isolating alone, which can be really lonely, but I also think I'd lose my mind if I were isolating with others. I'm sure if I were with others, I'd be making them as crazy as they make me.
Avatar universal
Irritability can be a symptom of many different things.  I know that I am starting to get off track when little things start really annoying me that usually don't bother me. I have found that the best way that i can deal with this is making sure that I am doing good what I like to call maintenance self care. Find things that you can do routinely to manage your stress. For me it is limiting alcohol, going for nature walks, stretching daily to relax muscles, reading, getting to bed at a reasonable hour,etc. I notice that when I do this I am not letting my stress build to the point that I get annoyed.
Hey there tatortot4, really great post.  Appreciate that and agree with you.  If we can learn to use these things as part of our warning system and work on root causes, all the better for us, right?  Thanks again!
Have an Answer?
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
15 signs that it’s more than just the blues
Can depression and anxiety cause heart disease? Get the facts in this Missouri Medicine report.
Simple, drug-free tips to banish the blues.
A guide to 10 common phobias.
Are there grounds to recommend coffee consumption? Recent studies perk interest.
For many, mental health care is prohibitively expensive. Dr. Rebecca Resnik provides a guide on how to find free or reduced-fee treatment in your area