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Avatar universal

Not coping

My miscarriage was on the 23rd of November, I was handling it really well and accepted that sometimes it just happened.. but from a couple of weeks ago I've just been feeling so down about everything.. I've been avoiding pregnant friends and friends with babies.. I cant handle it and I feel like a horrible friend :( I know im not the only person to go thru this but none of my friends have and I feel so alone :( I cry all the time.. most nights I find myself crying because I read something and it upsets me. And I'm happy for my friends but im so jealous.. this is my 2nd miscarriage in a year :( I hate it.. and I want more than anything to be pregnant agaun and try again but im so terrified of having to go through all of this again.. I dont know what I'm doing anymore :'(
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Avatar universal
Thanks girls, I'll talk to my doctor again and of he won't help me I'll look for another one :)

Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm so sorry to hear about your losses. I have lost two, one at 16 and one at 17 weeks, all in the last year. I would like to say talking is very helpful. Being able to converse up here with the people has helped me alot. I also am able to talk to my boyfriend which is most helpful. As for trying again that's what keeps me going forward. I have learned alot from people off this site. I take this information and take it to my doctor. Your doctor works for you it's not the other way around. After two losses you are considered high risk. You can start with the blood work, and then work your way from there. If your doctor is not willing to run whatever test is necessary then you should find another doctor. I had to change doctors and even now I want to change doctors. But now I just advocate for myself, and if she don't be proactive then I will move on. I already have it planned for my next conception. You can ask to have a chromosomal analysis done. So again take all that you hear and learn from here and bring it to your doctors attention and if they are not making any effort find another dr. Good luck.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Well I lost mine because I have fibroids but since this is my third miscarriage, my dr is doin an ultrasound to see how they are and where so he can remove them, why don't u change ur dr and say that u had more losses, maybe they'll do something
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
That's terrible of your doctor, planned or not, you've still lost 2. Is be looking into getting a new doctor and asking for some tests. Best of luck, school might ge the distraction you need :)
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Avatar universal
And I made it to 12 weeks.. I was 12 weeks and 1 day when I started bleeding.. I finally thought I was in the clear
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Avatar universal
Its nice to talk to people who dont just say aw you dont really want a baby anyway they're a handful or your time will come..

My doctor won't check anything or do anything because both of my miscarriages were unplanned pregnancies anyway, but it doesn't mean it hurts any less..

I'm sorry for everyones losses too.. its so hard :(
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Awwweeee I'm like that too, I lost mine on October and I still cry and feel down, I thought by now it would be better, but no, is the same
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6202880 tn?1380332653
I'm so sorry for what you're going through! I lost 3 in a year (don't have any other children yet) and I was very much the same way with the last one. Right at first it seemed to be going ok, but then it became very difficult to cope. Have you gotten your progesterone levels checked? That is a common cause for miscarriage. Another common cause is a blood clotting disorder, which we are suspecting is my problem. I am now on baby aspirin to thin my blood. After a mc it takes a while for our hormones to level out again. If you have access to ******* products, I highly recommend getting a bottle of GLA to take. It balances hormones and has helped me tremendously! I can totally relate to what you're going through and wanna wish you the best! With time (and leveling out of hormones) it does become a bit easier to cope and relate to other moms better. Blessings!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thankyou, I'm sorry for your losses too.. my doctor wont do anything unless I have a 3rd and even then he said they might not.. I'm going to be studying again soon so hooefully that helps me.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm sorry your feeling this way, I can certainly relate, I've lost 2 in 2 years and have no children. It will take time for you to grieve and everyone does it differently, cry when you need to but try not to isolate yourself from family and friends too much.
Have you thought about talking to a counselor? I found talking to other ladies on here was very helpful.
It is hard seeing others who are pregnant or having babies especially when it's family or close friends, if I find I'm getting down about it I try to think of it as though 'maybe they had problems too, maybe this is their miracle', it still hurts but I try to find the positive to help change my mood.
Getting on top of your emotions will help you to decide when trying again will be best for you.
Have you spoken to your doctor about why the miscarriages are happening? Most times there is nothing you can change but sometimes there are tablets that might help, depending on what could be causing them.
You've gone through a lot in the past year, it might help you to take a couple months off from trying, pri-occupy yourself with a hobby and give yourself a chance to relax and have some time for yourself.
Helpful - 0
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