First, psychiatrists are mainly for medication and they are really expensive. What you would want is a psychologist or other type of talk therapist. I'm alone on this site as not believing HOCD is OCD at all. You are definitely having obsessive thoughts, though, and they are unpleasant. The first question would be, did something happen to start this? You say it came out of nowhere but maybe if you dig down deep something happened, such as rejection or perceived rejection by a female you liked. Of course you are going to feel a lack of attraction to women if your mind is obsessed by thinking about other things -- only so much room in there. And let me be the first to tell you, as you are young and sound like you haven't had any actual sexual activity yet, having a finger in your ass feel pretty good for heterosexual men and women sometimes. It can make an orgasm more intense. It has nothing at all to do with your sexuality, it's just physiology and where the pressure is being felt. But there is something in what you are saying that might explain why this bothers you so much, and that is, you do sound very anti-gay. You have stereotypes that those who have no knowledge of gay people have. Not all gay men are effeminate, and there is no gay way of walking. A lot of the action heroes you probably watch are gay. Just as not all heterosexual people are the same, neither are all gay people. You also use the term gay pornography vs. "normal" porn. Whether or not any porn is "normal," by using that term you are again letting it be known that normal for you is hetero and gay is not normal. But it is normal for a gay person. You are obviously hetero, but you are also evincing great insecurity about yourself and your sexuality and therapy might let you learn why you're feeling that. You might also figure that out on your own. But these thoughts only bother you because you are very biased against gays, and you probably don't even know that or think that, but it clearly comes out in how you talk about it. Don't feel bad about that, we have lived through several centuries of anti-gay bias and we all have it to some extent, including gay people. It wasn't always like that; if you go back far enough in history you'll find bisexuality and homosexuality were common and accepted. But that was a long time ago, and so it's been very hard to get past that and accept people for who they are. You're having a hard time accepting yourself for who you are. Talking it out with someone might very well help. Peace.