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HIV OCD and WORRY
Hi I'm Back! I can't get this HIV OCD out of my head, I can't let it go!
I've had 2 events that are totally NON RISK but I worry> The 1st was I was working as a Fire Marshal for a haunted house, a 15 yr old kid fell and hit his head and was bleeding from the head. I put gloves on and went over to him and called for a ambulance. I only touched his leg. He had sweatpants on, it was a real quick pat to get him to lay still! I never touched him where he was bleeding! The ambulance got there in 2 min and took the kid. I took my gloves off inside out and threw them away and disenfected my hands! I had a 3 day old paper cut on my palm, it wasn't even really a cut. And you Guess it!!! I start worrying and thinking what if the kids blood got on my paper cut!! I never touched him!!! just his leg and I start freaking! I then donated blood 18 days later. it was my 4th gallon!! I know I have nothing to worry about but I do!!
Then last week I got called to a E-cig that exploded in a 24yr olds mouth and knocked his 2 front teeth out!
The E-cig shot out like a rocket and was burning! A fellow firefigher, who never touched the patient picked up the device and burnt battery which was still hot and put it into a latex glove and then put it into a plastic walmart bag! I got to the scene 10-12 min later and took the plastic bag with my bare hand and put it into my trunk!
Then my OCD starts to think- WHAT IF theres blood on the bag? I looked at the bag with gloves on like 20 times and it was clean! I couldnt see anything! I had my wife look and she said there was nothing!! I asked the firefighter and he said it was a clean bag!!! I didnt have any cuts or scrapes on my bare hand that touched the bag for 5 seconds but I worry!! There was no Blood and it was outside exposed to air!!!
I really need to stop this!! I messaged Rubywitch and she has been great! she said there is no risk at all for both events! it's my OCD and I know this but can't stop thinking about it!
I even email Dr Hook, who used to be on medhelp. he has a new site. and he replied that, I have nothing to worry about and that both these events were of NO RISK and no need to test!! HIV isn't transmitted this way!
I've been on this site so much and I know the only ways to be infected- 1) dont have unsafe sex w people whose status you dont know and 2) don't share drug works! thats it! no other way!! I'm married and I dont do drugs!! So why do I worry!!! I'm seeing a psychologist and I'm on 200mg of zoloft! and I'm going to see an other therapist and do EMDR which is a rapid eye movement therapy thats suppose to help w OCD and PSTD!
I know all of this sounds irrational and I know it is!!! I just want peace of mind and to enjoy my life! I was doing good but then this popped up! I know I'm not alone in this and I appreciate any advice and Help!
This is a horrible way to go on! esp when every little ache or twitch or I don't feel good. I think it's HIV!!! and I haven't done anything to put myself or family at risk. Thank you for letting me get this out!!!!
I've had 2 events that are totally NON RISK but I worry> The 1st was I was working as a Fire Marshal for a haunted house, a 15 yr old kid fell and hit his head and was bleeding from the head. I put gloves on and went over to him and called for a ambulance. I only touched his leg. He had sweatpants on, it was a real quick pat to get him to lay still! I never touched him where he was bleeding! The ambulance got there in 2 min and took the kid. I took my gloves off inside out and threw them away and disenfected my hands! I had a 3 day old paper cut on my palm, it wasn't even really a cut. And you Guess it!!! I start worrying and thinking what if the kids blood got on my paper cut!! I never touched him!!! just his leg and I start freaking! I then donated blood 18 days later. it was my 4th gallon!! I know I have nothing to worry about but I do!!
Then last week I got called to a E-cig that exploded in a 24yr olds mouth and knocked his 2 front teeth out!
The E-cig shot out like a rocket and was burning! A fellow firefigher, who never touched the patient picked up the device and burnt battery which was still hot and put it into a latex glove and then put it into a plastic walmart bag! I got to the scene 10-12 min later and took the plastic bag with my bare hand and put it into my trunk!
Then my OCD starts to think- WHAT IF theres blood on the bag? I looked at the bag with gloves on like 20 times and it was clean! I couldnt see anything! I had my wife look and she said there was nothing!! I asked the firefighter and he said it was a clean bag!!! I didnt have any cuts or scrapes on my bare hand that touched the bag for 5 seconds but I worry!! There was no Blood and it was outside exposed to air!!!
I really need to stop this!! I messaged Rubywitch and she has been great! she said there is no risk at all for both events! it's my OCD and I know this but can't stop thinking about it!
I even email Dr Hook, who used to be on medhelp. he has a new site. and he replied that, I have nothing to worry about and that both these events were of NO RISK and no need to test!! HIV isn't transmitted this way!
I've been on this site so much and I know the only ways to be infected- 1) dont have unsafe sex w people whose status you dont know and 2) don't share drug works! thats it! no other way!! I'm married and I dont do drugs!! So why do I worry!!! I'm seeing a psychologist and I'm on 200mg of zoloft! and I'm going to see an other therapist and do EMDR which is a rapid eye movement therapy thats suppose to help w OCD and PSTD!
I know all of this sounds irrational and I know it is!!! I just want peace of mind and to enjoy my life! I was doing good but then this popped up! I know I'm not alone in this and I appreciate any advice and Help!
This is a horrible way to go on! esp when every little ache or twitch or I don't feel good. I think it's HIV!!! and I haven't done anything to put myself or family at risk. Thank you for letting me get this out!!!!
Relax bro it's all good. You're overthinking this. I'm probably not the right guy tk tell u because I suffer from HOCD which is ridiculous cuz I know I'm straight lol but you're fine. We all overthink things but just my advice which is helping me is stay confident. Also the compulsions are making you bug out. Just tell yourself when you're about to compiler say okay breathe it's all good I'm overthinking this.
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