I’m afraid of myself

[v4venus42]

I have been self harming and I recently threw myself down stairs, I have ocd and I feel like the compulsions in my head that before were harmless ie washing hands etc are now the ones demanding I hurt myself and it’s escalating and I don’t feel like I can control it. I need help to know what to do next.

[HollywoodNurse2001]

In health care since 2001. You need to find a counseling center that will take walk in crisis counseling on a regular basis. What area do you live. I can help direct you to a good place. You  most likely need( I am NOT a Doctor and only a licensed psychiatrist can give a diagnosis, treatment and proper medications) to start short acting medications  for these behaviors, like ativan or haldol seem to work well for the population I serve.. You definitely need some simple very in-inexpensive coping mechanisms  that you have access to  during the course of a day, and every day if possible.You need to use the crisis phone numbers on the internet or phone book..and talk to someone during your crisis.I can assist you in finding these numbers. Suicide hot line will work... but there are some that sound less "intense" if you prefer.I beg you  do not harm your self. I care.I have personally used a fountain soda at the gas station as a quick coping trick. costs$ 1.20 .I mix flavors. Use diet and occasionally regular.I chew sugar free gum, 50 pieces a day. I pick out different pictures I enjoy looking at and save them to my cell. or computer. Exercise, text, shop, and have a passion for learning something new each day.Ill probably never get to Hollywood and live out a dream, so I wear my glitter and glam outfits every day here in small town of 30,000..This is MY life and I want to have fun and be responsible christian, but just because i probably wont be all that I dreamed of, i wont stop doing what I would do if I had succeed at it anyway, I behave like a millionaire and i am not one.I keep high class friends and contacts. and it started with one new one for 5 years then .I changed my life, and the rest came in to it once I changed me.I went from disabled and  unemployed to close to a six figure income.  with a long awaited job offer.Yes my whole life changed in a 2 minute phone call. I waited nearly 6 years for that to happen.Praying for you.God bless.
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