How to overcome HOCD

[Taj2]

Listen man, I’ve been suffering with mental health since I was really young. For the past couple of months though I’ve been suffering with a lot of HOCD and it’s only seemed to get worse. Even when I try to let these thoughts just flow and not react, they barely even slow down. If they don’t stop shouldn’t they at least wither a little. And when I try to distract myself with things like movies or music, I always end up ruining the experience by fighting with myself. Whenever I look at a man now I’m compelled to say I’m attracted to them, when in reality I’ve never been attracted to any man in my entire life. Another thing is I don’t feel as attracted to women as I used to anymore and it scares me. I mean I can masturbate to them without a problem, but as soon as I’m done all the doubt just starts to set in again. I’m trying, I swear to go I’m trying to just calm myself and not react to anything but it feels helpless. There are more important things going on in the world right now it seems unfair that being gay is all I think about. Please, if you have any advice I’ll be glad to listen.

[Paxiled]

First of all, the only reason this bothers anyone is the long-time bias against gays.  This wasn't true for most of the human history we can trace, as pre-Christian societies seemed to be bisexual.  If you're gay you're gay and that's okay.  If you're not you're not.  The answer isn't in your head, it's who you choose to have sex with assuming you're old enough to be having sex with anyone.  It's who you fall in love with.  If you masterbate, you are at an age of sexuality becoming realized, and if you do it to pictures of women that pretty much answers your question factually.  But if thoughts get in your head obsessively enough to give you a phobia -- the term HOCD isn't really accurate, you have developed a phobia about your sexuality.  The way to work that out is to see a therapist and learn why you're so consumed by this insecurity.  Peace.