Please can someone help

[Winter111]

I don’t know if it’s HOCD! I mean I know I’m not a lesbian,but why do my thoughts imagine me telling people I am? I’ve completely freaked. I can’t afford therapy. I’m scared this will always be in the back of my mind. I love my boyfriend. Please anyone help

[Paxiled]

Can you explain more what you mean by your "thoughts" telling you things?  

[Winter111]

So they are telling me I’m lesbian! Or saying imagine coming out to your family etc. Or when I’m talking they want me to say tell them your lesbian I hate it

[Paxiled]

Anything happen before this started that might have triggered this kind of obsessive thinking?  Such as, a break-up?  Something that made you feel insecure?  Seeing or hearing something that involved lesbians?  Do you get obsessive thinking about other things?  I'm not sure HOCD is really a thing.  A lot of people are, however, very anxious about their sexuality at some point in their lives, especially young people, especially when feeling insecure.  The gay thing is a phobia because society for so long has been so biased against homosexuality  that it's just deeply embedded in us even when we don't notice it.  Otherwise it wouldn't bother you, right?  We all have all kinds of thoughts that sometimes stick with us for awhile, it's what the brain does.  When it bothers us, it's usually an anxiety thing or stress and if it sticks around long enough it can get in the way of our lives.  Some of us are more prone to this kind of thinking than others.  On the other hand, when you have thoughts that you think are telling you what to do, that's more intense.  You might want to consult a therapist if it's bothering you this much and explore why it is.  Again, you have all kinds of thoughts, why is this one so bothersome?  That's what you need to figure out.  As for being a lesbian, actions tell you that.  We all have thoughts.  We find out if we're gay by acting on them.  You aren't.

[Winter111]

Lockdown that’s the only thing I can think of! I know when someone I knew came out I was having a laugh with one of my friends and then all of a sudden I was like oh gosh am I? And then it started from there it then went away! And then I thought about it in lockdown, and bam I’ve had thoughts that want me to say I’m a lesbian, or imagine coming out. Not sure if it’s Cos I’ve read people’s coming out stories! And like people have said it doesn’t matter if you was, then my mind is saying it wouldn’t matter and I know I’m not! I couldn’t imagine doing anything with a woman I really couldnt!