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staring at private parts of people even while talking to family members also

i am 22 yr old an engineering student......i have been suffering ocd staring for around 3 yrs....look whenever i am around the people or while talking to the people(friends or family members or anyone).....i usually look at their private parts and this makes me feel worst in front of the people.....and they also dont want to interact with me and ignore me everywhere......and due to this reasons girls not at all talk with me......i feel like that .....i wish i would never exist in this world :(.......
getting depressed more due to this.....plz help someone
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Avatar universal
I am facing the same problem since I am 22.I have faced lots of problems from my family, my relatives and From my office.I just starting to look at their private parts with out any intention.Everybody thinks that I am a gay.I feel so depressed.And I feel it is better to commit suicide .Then I am go to a retreat centre called gagulta retreat centre.I prayed harder when i did counselling the counsellor said that the god will bless you .after two months it Slowly reduced and 90 percent of my problem was solved.then I tried to think positively whatever bad things happens .I becomes very happy
Helpful - 1
1 Comments
I have the same problem...and that's NOT who I am, I have prayed about this and I still do it...HELP
Avatar universal
- take ppl in ur vision the way YOU want it to be taken in, not how you think THEY want to be looked at.

- follow YOUR rythm, YOUR feelings in social settings , what feels good to YOU and try erase ‘ THEM’ people.

What feels comfortable to YOU, is all that matters. If YOU are feeling comfortable, chances are others feel comfortable easier. It takes practice.
Helpful - 0
1699033 tn?1514113133
COMMUNITY LEADER
Your best bet would be to start with a psychologist.  They teach cognitive behavioral therapy (or at least you should look for one that does).  Together you can come up with a treatment plan.  If it comes down to taking medication, then the psychologist can put you in touch with a psychiatrist.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
i'd like to know,

did any of you before the staring obsession occured, had:

1. prolonged erections
2. porn adiction
3. pain in the chest
4. panic attack and anxiety problem
5. benzodiazepines use
6. uncontrolled angriness
7. amallgam removal from tooth
8. religious obsession
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thanks for the advice, i'v read almost every forum about the staring problem, each advice helps a lot, lately im not having the problem while walking, i only suffer while sitting, but with god's help we'll get better,

i'll keep the page updated about my final resuslts,
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
     I had the same problem..with males and females.I suffered a lot socially.I became isolated due to this problem.But then I found a Solution..I found out there are 3 aspects to this problem..

.A} Concentrating while talking to people (It became impossible due to this problem) and second is:

B} Social Anxiety: This problem is basically due to some form of social anxiety.So the solution is to get rid of the social Anxiety.This I did in stages...
        Step 1) While walking,whoever passes you by, you should stare at people in their eyes.This should be done each and every time..after about 5-10 days of doing this,the next step is:

        Step 2) Approach random people and talk to them..This is easier said than done.My way was to stop different people randomly and ask random addresses.This would initiate a conversation and then I would make it a point to look at them in the eye while doing this..Even if I stared at their private parts during this conversation,it would not affect me as there would be no shame as I would never meet those people again..Iniating conversation with strangers greatly reduced my social anxiety and as a result I became confident while talking to people and my OCD significantly reduced.Doing this for around 15 to 20 days significantly reduced the social anxiety I had in talking to people..

              For further improvement you can practice conversations with the people already burnt(People who know  you have this problem) and other strangers to gain confidence.

Doing the above things reduced my problems for upto 70 percent of the times.But..

C} The third problem being: I noticed that even after practicing all these things I still used to look at breasts and crotches( If they were right in the line of my vision).So to find a solution to this problem,I decided to apply the ERP technique on my own..that is : While talking to women and men,consciously but subtly look at their private parts.Doing this, I believe the fear and curiosity vanishes.

  I am still applying this third problem's solution.I am sure within a month or so,I will be free of OCD (fingers crossed).

Do these things step by step i.e
1) Concentration improvement by Meditation (I do Yoga)

2) Social anxiety reduction by the way of starting a conversation with random people many times.

3) Removal of curiosity by subtly staring at the private parts.

I hope this will help all you guys.Be sure to continue doing these above steps everyday for atleast 4-5 months to remove your OCD problem asap forever.This worked for me.

Best wishes.
-GAURAU


Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
hello shaz good to hear you almost complitely cured, we would appriciate any advice of your cure
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
i have some problem i used to look privat parts all the time and every body  i tried many times to focus on face but i can only 30 minut can focus
now , im in the house watching tv playing play station no School no work, only waiting white sheet i live in norway any help please
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Solution is there, just need to do some hard work. I had similar issue for few years but after consulting a psychiatrist I have significantly improved and now around 90% or more in control.
Helpful - 0
1 Comments
Bro I also belong from a small place in India and suffering from the same problem . this *****. This ocd is destroying my social and family life. Now I think I have to go Delhi to seek psychiTrist
1699033 tn?1514113133
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi there.  Makstam467 I know you are young and have not seen a therapist but have you tried therapy Kappa?  This does fall under OCD.  Makstam467 have you talked to your parents about this?  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am 14 yeas old every since  I started puberty at age 12 I had this I'm not able comical with friends cry a lot feel like I'm depressed  and my men teacher and my women teacher alway cover there parts when talk to them . Help please
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Is there anyone that has this that has found a solution..I suffer from this and have been for a few years..it's devastating,embarrassing,makes you want to live in a box,it's soo involuntary but it's a habit that keeps hopping beyond my control..it makes me uncomfortanle and causes me to have anxiety about being around people..i font want to start at any ones inappropriate. Areas but it happens.My family has noticed..I've quit great jobs because the staff noticed me starring at them or looking at them inappropriately..it's like when the body is covered I have no anxiety but as soon as some one sits next to me or talks to me and they have on pants my eyes are draw to there crotch no matter how I try to look them in the eyes pleeeeeease help me!!!!! I feel like my life is over..i wanted to kill myself a few times because of this..but then I thought of my daughter who's 10., I just want help..i haven't told any one but my husband about the starring but I really don't think he understands.. this is the main reason why I stay in isolation away from people...The starring at people inappropriately really kills me..i just want a doctor that will help this is real!! Ocd starring at genitals!! Embarrassing but I can't help it!!somebody anybody Help!!!!!!!!!
Helpful - 0
1 Comments
Dear Kappa, I have almost the same problem. I am also starring at people, especially males (I am a woman), and it is so embarrassing for me, since I have never been kind of girl who checks out other man. I am not starring at their private parts, but more in whole person., which is also very disturbing.I have a good husband and a wonderful daughter (7 years old). No matter, very young, old, middle aged, my eyes are involuntary moving to this person. Sometimes this also includes woman and kids. I am also not pervert, and I don't think about sex when I am doing this, I am just afraid, and try to stop, but I can't.And when people notice this, they are rejecting me,or laughing at me. I am unable to work, shift stores where I shop, I am embarrassed to go to the kindergarten to pick up my little girl. It has been like this for more than five years. I tried psychotherapy, medications, nothing helped. I am constantly thinking about killing myself, the only think that stops me is my daughter. I told my husband and my family, but they don't understand. I desperately need help. If you have found a way to stop with this please write me, even if you didn't ...
1699033 tn?1514113133
COMMUNITY LEADER
Interesting KevJames.....how does this work?  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi.  Do you wear glasses?  Just add a strip of scotch tape across the bottom third of the outside of the lenses.  Cut to fit so it doesn't look funny.  That should solve your problem and give you your life back again!  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hello...am female and i do this with males and females alike, i am about to get crazy. i am not a pervert or like sex more than anybody else!!! :(((( i am in a terrible sorrow...i can't be normal.ever at all.
Helpful - 0
1 Comments
Hey, i m also a female and suffering from this from past 4 to 5 years.. I dont understand how really i got this.. its making me too uncomfortable around ppl. I m not able to face anyone. Pls do let me know if u have got any any solution, kindly help me with this. Hope u can understand my problem as u have faced the same
Avatar universal
Hello...am female and i do this with males and females alike, i am about to get crazy. i am not a pervert or like sex more than anybody else!!! :(((( i am in a terrible sorrow...i can't be normal.ever at all.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm 44, have had the same problem for 15 yrs now.  Are you coping ok?
Helpful - 0
1699033 tn?1514113133
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi there.  So if you don't have the ability to see a psychologist then you need to learn things on your own.  Can you access the book  The OCD Workbook:  Your Guide to Breaking free of OCD?  In the states it could be ordered on Amazon but not sure what you have available to you in India.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
well.....i belong to small place from india....pyschologists are not available here :(
Helpful - 0
1699033 tn?1514113133
COMMUNITY LEADER
Where are you from?  ERP is taught by a psychologist.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
that means ive to use medication as well as E&RP treatment i.e. to face that situation which i always fear while talking with people........but how should i start?
Helpful - 0
1699033 tn?1514113133
COMMUNITY LEADER
Here is an article that you might find helpful.  

http://www.wsps.info/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=63:heres-looking-at-you-kid-people-with-ocd-who-notice-things-too-much&catid=0:

Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thanks a lot........i am looking forward to your reply
Helpful - 0
1699033 tn?1514113133
COMMUNITY LEADER
I am trying to find some reference articles for you so give me a little bit.  Thanks.  
Helpful - 0
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