IS IT PTSD?

[Zandriya]

So I have been diagnosed with schizophrenia anxiety disorder and PTSD among other issues lol, but I was wondering... I am usually pretty fine during the day, but at nighttime things get really bad for me. I have a history of sexual abuse so I was wondering if this was PTSD... At nightime I hear voices (which is the schizo), but I also feel as if people are taking advantage of me... it's the worst feeling in the world, I can't control my body and I feel like people are touching me and raping me... I can't tell if this is the PTSD or not, because i have upped my meds a thousand times for Schizophrenia and the voices sometimes go away but these feelings do not... is there a medication that can help me work through this or should i just battle it out?
Also these feelings cause my to have a lot of self hatred because i feel like it was all my fault that this happened and sometimes i even feel suicidal. Should i be checking myself in somewhere for around the clock psychiatric health, i really don't want to and it sounds scary, but i don't know if it is necessary or not.

[doctora]

Well Im glad Im not alone. I have a few others I could add to the list...LOL

[drifter0213]

i have both PTSD and schizophrenia also

[doctora]

I have pretty close to the same diagnosis that you have, but I have a few more added on for good measure...LOL

I too was raped at 7 yrs old and a couple of more times in my teens.

I too hear voices, primarily male, especially when I am in the shower, but I convince myself that its nothing, but my shower time gets cut down.

The only time I had the feeling that someone was touching my body is when I was taking Geodon, I was shaking, tense, it was horrible, and it did bring up some old memories that I am trying to put aside for now - so I got off of it ASAP, and to replace it my Dr put me on Abilify, along with Seroquel (600mg) per day, but every so often I hear voices still.

I think the feeling thing was part of a bad side effect from the Geodon, possibly muscle spasms all over? But now I am off it Im okay.

You said you upped your meds a thousand times, maybe you should just let it ride until your body can catch up to the meds and level out.

Hope this helps.

[Zandriya]

I should probably read that book :)

[margypops]

Write it down ..many of our most celebrated poets  writers had 'wild 'thoughts so get writing , our thoughts can spin out of control but if you take that control back it becomes something you can use, not as a weapon but as a tool ,keep that little brain busy , I am quoting this from a book that helped me a lot a few years ago, '  Its impossible to experience any negative feeling without first creating a negative corresponding thought'. The truth is our thinking will always create the reality we perceive ' it was written by Richard Carlson in a book called 'Slowing down to the Speed of life " ....

[Zandriya]

Thank you so much for your support. I will definitely try thinking about other things, because i am just so imaginative that my thoughts turn into wild day dreams i think and i over think a lot of it and it spins out of control, so keeping that in mind might help me some.

[margypops]

I am sorry you are feeling scared and suicidal, have you had any therapy treatments are you able to talk this through with any professional.Sometimes the meds can have side effects it may be a good idea to speak to the prescribing Doctor to check the dosage out.especially as you have upped the dose. It is never your fault if you have been abused, never, a lot of victims feel like that you are not alone, it was the perpetrator not you .....Sometimes our thoughts can make you feel really bad whatever disorder you have, I know its not easy but try to switch off from the thoughts a bit at a time , make it a project to see how long you can do it for.So when you start to overthink, especially worrying thoughts see if you can think of something else..anything. Good Luck let us know how you are doing, you are not alone ...