This is my first time posting and I really hope someone out there can help me.
I have been dealing with an undiagnosed chronic illness for almost two years now. The general symptoms have changed over time but the pain has always been a constant. And right now, it’s only the pain I care about.
What seems like eons ago now, the pain started as systematic, but now its more localized, particularly various joints and the muscles and tendons associated with them. Every specialist I saw, before my insurance company dropped me, tried to saddle me with a fibro diagnosis. I do not have trigger points, pressure helps, not hurts, and none of the flavor of the week fibro pharmaceuticals (that their drug reps had just sold them on) have had any effect aside from destroying my body chemistry from going on and off the different anti-depressants in them. And when I refused to take several of them after doing research before filling the script, I was treated as an addict and told to ‘take it or leave it’.
In the last week I have developed excruciating pain in the MP joints of my hands. This has effectively taken my usual pain level of a 5 or 6 on a good day and skyrocketed it to no lower then a 9. It’s so bad that it’s beginning to cancel out my prescription sedatives. Even though I’ve taken the pills faithfully every night, the pain is so intense that I cannot achieve REM. The only time it feels better is when I press the fingers of the opposite hand deep into the knuckles. And that only drops it down to an 8, if I’m lucky.
The pain is so unbearably intense and it never goes away. Never. It is literally driving me insane.
I make too much for Medicare and far too little to afford to see a doctor without insurance. I have exhausted every avenue I can think of and I have found absolutely no relief. No one will give me pain killers, or take the time to do more then run the same blood tests over and over again. I don’t know what to do, or where to go or if there’s even any help to be found. I am scared and alone and I just want the pain to stop. I can’t do this on my own anymore.
If anyone knows of any resources for the broke and uninsured, or even a doctor in New Jersey that’s willing to investigate and not just nod and throw medications at me, I would be more grateful then I can say.
And on a side note: I am not suicidal. Yes, I go through periods of depression, but I’ve been in agony for almost two years, of course I’m going to get depressed. I do not need direction to counseling services please, I need a physician. Thank you for understanding.