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what do I do

I am here due to curiosity, and i must say philnoir responses impress the hell out of me.  I hope to briefly explain whats up, and go from there.Maybe you will have answers i cant find from anyone else.I was in a wreck in 04. front royal hosp would have just taken my limbs off, but the great drs in alexandria, where i was sent to, decided to use me as a class project and rebuilt me to a tune of 38 pins and screws, 5 metal bone reinforcements, a metal femur, several cables and 2 6 inch screws. I was told i probably would never walk, but I didnt beleieve them,  after 8 monthes in the hosp and rehab, i walk, and function at about 45%.my motivation was my three kids, and now being a single parent. (my wife died from the wreck)
at one time I was so hopped up on meds it defeated the purpose of being rebuilt, since i was so drugged out i could not function, so my dr and i took me down on dosages so low i was miserable, then we started increasing this and that until i was where, even though i still had moderate pain, i could at least function to properly take care of my kids. we dropped xanex altogether, 8 10ml meth and 5 30 ml oxy for bt pain every 24. this year we have gone so far as to rduce my meth to 5 per day, still at 6 30ml oxy for bt.
it has been ten years since my wreck. One kid is now married with 1 child, and attending nursing school. middle child is now a freshman in college with excellent grades, and no real wimpy courses. political science, political phsycology, economics, and more. hes is awesome. my youngest now a sophomore in hs and takes 3 AP courses, 3 honors, civil engineering academy, robotics club, organized a suicide watch program and more.my kids are awesome, and i feel a lot of that is due to quality of life. with everything they had to endure, they are still thankful they had me, and i love the fact that i have been able to be there for them at least in the capacity I have been. I feel that quality of life is what has helped them to achieve their potentials, because i was there, and not some one else.
now, the quality of life is being threatened. i dont know where i am going to end up when this is all over. (i thought it was all over a year ago, but i was wrong)
remember when you couldnt find a30ml oxy to save your life. it was difficult, for about a year. i would faithfully go to my pharm, and they would faithfully fill my scripts. like clockwork.it all seemed to blow over, although my pharm i used for 5 yrs or so would not fill them any more, so i found a new branch, and they have done well. about every other month i get to play seek and find, and all the places i go get to laugh and send me on my way, but i usually will find my pills after 20 or 25 stops in a day. you cant let them get you down, no matter how hard they try.Maybe i shouldnt ask you this, and i already know the answer,but do pharmacists lie ? and do they enjoy it? (yes to both)
it is difficult being on these meds, i have been taking them for quite some time. but now i am to be made to feel like a drug addict, a "seeker", and guilty of something I have yet to figure out. one pharm says they have regulars they hold meds for, another says they are not allowed to hold pills, and must dispense them in a first come first serve. a friend at my docs office referes me to a phamacy where he gets his, but when i go there they havent carried that drug in 2 yrs.  my reg pharm only had 22, so i went to other pharmacies, including another of the same chain about 3 miles away.after almost 30 pharmacies that day, i went back to get the 22. he could see what the day had done to me, and said "hold on", and picked up the phone. he then sent me to a pharmacy he called, and asked the pharmacist there to do him a favor if he had the pills would he fill my script, he did , so i went. i ended up at the 3rd pharmacy i stopped at that day that "does not stock that pill anymore". they got no shipments, the pills were there earlier when i had stopped in before.
does anyone else out there have any of these situations occur?I am clean cut, polite, and i smile the whole time, i stay "up" because i know that its a numbers  thing, but the negativity i have to contend with is ridiculous. now, about the quality of life thing is,  my dr is now saying that we have to start reducing my 30 ml numbers because "they" have set a maximum on the amount allowed to be disbursed. I can only get 4 per day from now on. so i reduced from 8 to 5 on the 10 ml meth, voluntarily, and supposedly that is the new number anyhow, but now i can only take 4 30 ml oxy per day. (who is this "they", the pharmacists have been using "they" for about 2 years or so, and now "they" are governing my dr too. if you know who "they" are, will you tell me, because those that "they" are governing are still to stay anonymous. In other words, when i ask "who is they", no one can tell me. (yes, I have asked a few times) does anyone really know what is going on.?
i know that my abilities are being compromised. my medication dosage has been working up til now, i still maintain a pain level between 5 and 8 with meds, but my sleep is now being affected, so my days are being affected, my pain levels are increasing. its all going to crap.  
should I find a new dr.? or are the new dosage numbers real? how can I set it up to find a reliable pharmacist again? we split my script in half, (2 at 90) because it is a big gamble to try and find a pharm that has that many in one shot. so we fill the first one no problem ( as long as they have them), and then when it is time to fill the second, nobody has them. BUT, when they do have them, they wont fill the second part of the script because it is too early.this is driving me nuts.i know there is some bad stuff going on out there with these meds, i dont live under a rock, but the extreme parameters that have been put on these meds, and the lack of parameters given to pharmacies regarding patient responsibilities, has left disabled people like myself, with a real need for these meds, just running around like chickens with our heads cut off. drs appts and pharmacies really stress me out now. all i acn do is to play their game, and "they" know it. thank you for listening. any thing you can offer would be great, considering i get nothing out here but " you will do this, and you will like it".. I could go on and on.
real quick, one pharm, 3 weeks ago, using their new program of authenticating scripts, ( i ahd undergone this same system a year ago and passed, at this very pharmacy) they were going to fill y script, they had the pills, only waiting to hear from my dr.  well, my dr called, and the only thing different was that i was taking less pills.they had my script for 4 hrs and it was et to be filled, at six i was called to come get them. when i arrived, it was a different pharmacist, and i was told they would not fill it because i failed their questionaire. "how did i fail"? i asked. " you just did not meet our criteria." well, i had met it before you talked to my dr, was it something he said"? "no, "she said. I attempted to ask another question, but she interrupted saying just that i failed the questionair and she could not take anymore time with me. this is true I swear. I kept mile smile and said thank you and left.(you gotta keep smiling people know when you are carrying bad baggage. right). '
i promise to go now. but i really could tell more. fromwhat i have said here, do you think i am doing something wrong, the system changed and i dont know how to? help
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Avatar universal
Wow, and i do mean Wow.  You've been through a LOT.  I really feel for you.  Every singe Oxycontin came out in 1995-6, there has been an exponential rise in opiate-abuse.  Pharmacists are used to seeing people with drug-seeking behavior, and some pharmacies simply won't stock opiates at all.

What state are you in?

I know all too well how AWFUL pharmacists can be.  I don't usually reveal this, but I used to be a licensed pharmacists.  It is a burn-out job.  You work long hours standing on your feet the whole time, you have a quota of scripts you have to fill in one day or you get FIRED, and the public is not easy to deal with.

I wish I had better answers for you.  You sound like someone who is a legitimate pain patient, but I'm not a doctor.   The actions of a few drug-seeking people to get high have destroyed the chances for folks who really need these meds.

Your post was very long and and I had a hard time following some of it.  Could you discuss what you're going through with your doctor and try to strategize a different plan?  

I'll say a prayer for you tonight.  Keep well.
Helpful - 0
7721494 tn?1431627964
Yes, things have changed.

Visit my friend Steve the pharmacist's site for a pharmacy perspective:

http://www.pharmaciststeve.com/?p=5954#comments

Also, I like to recommend this site occassionally:

http://www.deasucks.com/index.htm

My advice -- keep learning. Keep fighting for effective and adequate pain care, for yourself and for others.

There are 100 million pain patients in America. Our voices are not being heard. Speak up.
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