Six year old boy does not respect parents- but does well in school and sports etc

[chrisld]

At home, my son focuses for 20 minutes and then decides to get out of control: singing, jumping, not listening at all.  The only way to get him off that stage is to hold him.

We were told to show respect for him and to empower him to control himself. We gave him a place for him to take times out, allowing him to decide when and for how long he should take a time out -to think.

We have gone over relaxation techniques etc.  He says he understands but NOTHING works!!
We tried to walk away and leave him alone,he follows us around. And we cannot jump into a car and leave him alone at home.

In school he is doing exceptionally well. He is the best in his class. His teacher says he would be doing even better if he would concentrate more.  He is also doing well in sports.  We took him to see a psychologist and he was amazed at his abilities and self discipline : yes sir, sat still, behave like an angel.

Maybe we are the problem. We don't not want to do. It is a constant battle for control. And we are very tired.

I appreciate your help,

Chris

[chrisld]

KLT83

THANK YOU so much for the great ideas.
I will put them into practice right away.

They make so much sense.  I feel foolish not having thought about them myself.

[KLT83]

First of all, I dont believe a 6 year old child should decide his own disapline. If he is extreamly hyper, make sure he has lots of outside time to play and run out the energy.  make sure he understands all of your household rules, sit down with him and write them down togather and have him help you to remember them, make this a special time for you and him.  Tell him that there will be a concequence for every rule he brakes (for example 10 min in time out) and stick to it!!! It also helps if you have a daily routine or scedual that you follow every day. Let him play outside when he first gets home from school to burn some of that energy. Try giving him some responibilities around the house, like taking out the trash, or clearing the table. I have a six year old boy, and its all about keeping him busy, and trying to make it fun. Try a reward system, like alowing him to have a popsicle after dinner if he is good that day, if he gets in trouble, DONT LET HIM HAVE IT! Its all about letting them know that you mean what you say. you have to be consistant. my son tends to act up when he gets bored, which is about ever 10 min, lol. this is why I say to keep him busy. I have sent my son on scavenger hunts in out house while im trying to clean or get things done. Tell hime to find you three things shaped like a cube, then when he comes back with them, tell him to find three things that are blue, so on and so on. It is hard once he is in the habbit of misbehaving so ovten, but it is possible to change his behavior. I hope these things help you, let me know