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Avatar universal

CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE

My 10 year old step-son has had a lot of problems.. I dont know where to begin.  

He has a real problem when it comes to animals or any living thing really.. He has put cats in the microwave, dishwasher, clothing washer, he even threw one in a vat of oil.. all of these incidents lead to the cat in questions death.  He picked up my dog, lifted him over his head and slammed him to the ground as hard as he could.. He has picked up animals and swung them around his head by their tails.. He is always angry, and he is a habitual liar.. even if its something  he wouldnt get in trouble for he still lies.. his father and I have both tried to break him of this.. and to no avail..  Whats worse is that thats not the worst of my problem..

I think he has been abused when he was little before I came into the picture.... Im not sure.. but since he was about 4-5 he was circling womens private parts in magazines, He has been drawing anatomically correct pictures of women.. His Aunt woke up one night with him on top of her going through sexual motions...when she asked him what he was doing, he said that she was his girlfriend.  He went to a friends birthday party and was caught under the covers with his friends 4 year old sister. He said they were playing house?!!  The final straw for me was when he touched MY 4 year old daughters private parts.  I dont know what to do to fix this.. or how to make it stop...

CAN ANYONE HELP ME????
11 Responses
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599170 tn?1300973893
Oh my, get that child into a psychiatrist asap, do you know almost all serial murders, murderd animals as children as a cry for help in child hood, skip right over therapy go directly to a licencesed pediatric psychiatrist not psychologist, he needs medication and therapy'''''he is screaming for help...whos it gonna be next the little kid down the street Id be terrified if I was you help this kid.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
We have brought him to the Center for Behavioral Heath for counseling there.. We have attempted to bring him to Meadows, they wont take him b/c we cant afford it..  We definitly cant afford a pshyciatrist... and no one.. not even ppl in the child protective Services will help us.. which kills me b/c he lives (obviously) under tha same roof as my 4 year old... Thank you for your input... I will look into it and see if I can find a nearby Child pshyciatrist that will take payments on a sliding scale.... Thanks!
Helpful - 0
599170 tn?1300973893
Your welcome, Id be terrified for that 4 yo next time the step son kills an animal get proof, get wittnesses, even if kids, take photos, hell imight so so far as to call animal patrol to come get the body, you need some proof if nobody believes you or soon this boy will grow and your gonna be sleeping with one eye open.
Helpful - 0
603946 tn?1333941839
I know it must be the hardest thing you have ever had to face- if you cannot afford help- isn't there an SSI program that helps here? or MHMR?

How about clergy at the very least they can counsel the adults.... if all else fails I suppose he can become a ward of the state- and it sounds so very cruel of me but I think he is headed that way anyway as a juvenile delinquent- Of course as you have realized already, animal torture is one of the first signs of being mentally ill...... it will be a person I am almost sure of it and I 'm sure you see it coming also-

My parents had to put my 13 year old brother in for psychiatric eval at age 13, and he stole a car off the hospital parking lot, from there on he went to juvenile facility of the state of Texas, then big boy jail, then prison for theft by check, then murder.....

So either find some way to get your younger children safe or take out a loan- and put him in military school or teen boot camp.
Helpful - 0
599170 tn?1300973893
wonderful advice, Im very concered about this poster, Her children are in danger.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I have already tried to get him made a ward of the state.. and they wont do ANYTHING until he goes one step farther.. I dont see how they think he hasnt gone far enough already!  No one but me will testify to the incidents his Aunt dont want to see him go away, and she was the only eye witness to that.. so me saying it is just hearsay... The little girl at the birthday party.. is his fathers best friends child.. who also will not tell anyone else about it....  No one else see's how making him a ward of the state would help.. we cant afford to get him the help that he needs, and the state could.. but they wont do it unless someone else comes forward and complains.. He is in a special class in school with only boys in his class.. so Im not too worried about that.. but he still goes to recess and lunch, and rides the bus with other little kids, he just kicked a 1st grader last week on the bus..  Im just at a loss..  I am in the process of applying for medicaid AGAIN.. so that I might be able to get him in to a counselor aside from my pastor..
Helpful - 0
599170 tn?1300973893
I am so sorry for you, this situation is terrible, have you talked to anyone thats a religious figure like priest etc... my cousin turned bad alcholic, was a widower and gave  all5 of his kids to state so I know it can be done, I feel sorry for this child but you need to protect the other children.
Helpful - 0
13167 tn?1327194124
Tiff, this is very,  very hard.   And my post is going to be long.  

Making him a ward of the state won't help him.    That will certainly  make him worse.

What would help him,  is to get him into a residential mental health assessment facility that specializes in juveniles.  That's what he needs.  I know this is expensive, but that's what he needs.   Your husband is responsible for his child,  although you aren't responsible for him.  

The other thought is do you and your husband have any children together?  Is your four year old daughter your husband's child?  If so,  this complicates this but I would move out.  

I would take my daughter,  wish them well,  and move out and have your husband take care of this child if you aren't willing to stay and bear the financial burden of getting appropriate help.  He is dangerous to your family and society as a whole,  and he needs to receive help from his parents who are responsible for him.  

Best wishes.  This must be very,  very scary.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Im at lost for words! so i can only imangian how hard this must be for yu but the first post is right most killers do these things hes been doing as childern. It deffanly sounds like hes been abaused, i would keep yur daughter far far away for now. have you asked her if hes ever done ne thing to her!?. He needs help/care asap! yur pastor isnt going to be able to give him nearly the amount of help and care he needs! im srry yur goin threw this yur in my prayers.

this might sound corkee but go the the dr phil website he has lots of links there to help. places for low income familys and that sort. or heck better yet email him maybe he'll have yu on the show, never knw cud be the chance to save yur son! before he really hurts someone elses child.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Actually I have gone to the Dr. Phil Website, and e-mailed him twice.. got nothin back.. idk.. and in response to RockRose.. both children have the same father.. and me and their father are married.. and ur right leavin him would be extremely hard.. this is a VERY complicated situation. .. I wish I could just pack up and dissapear.. but.. unfortunatly.. at this time in my life that also is not an option..
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Keep trying some times it just takes that 3 time to change yur luck, thousands and thousands of ppl apply every day keep tryin!!
Helpful - 0
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13167 tn?1327194124
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