Avatar universal

Daughter Aggression Issue

Hi, Greg here.

I have a 14 year old daughter that has grown a lot over the past two years.  She's around 5'11" now and catching up to her mother' height.  She's also very strong naturally, plus has become addicted to weight lifting over the past year since she joined her high schools field hockey team.  I'm 5'5 on a good day, 130 lbs soaking wet.

Her mother told her to clean her room last week before she went a way on a business trip.  Cleaning her room has been an issue, and my wife told me to check to make sure she cleaned it.  I went in her room, it wasn't clean, so I told her to clean it, and she said to me, "who's going to make me, you?".  She lifted me off the ground against the wall and started giggling.  I was a bit stunned at this moment, and I told her to put me down, and she paused for a while starring at me then said "maybe".  She put me down then told me she would clean it later.  I was very shaken up so I said "OK" and left.

I told her mother when she got home from her business trip and she laughed it off, saying "I guess she takes after my side of the family."  This wasn't exactly the support I was looking for.   I'm not sure what to do her and could use some advice.   Thanks.
3 Responses
13167 tn?1327194124
This post is very,  very familiar.

Have you posted here before under a different name?
Avatar universal

Hi RockRose,

Nope, first time poster, long time viewer.  If you are aware of anyone on here that has a similar issue and could direct me to them, I would greatly appreciate it.  Please IM me if you like.  Thanks.
Avatar universal
   Your wife's response is the correct response, as children grow up, parents should treat them as friends and give them enough space to grow up independently. You should take the role of a philosophor, guide and a friend and never try to force yourselves unnecessarily. Also in this case, your daughter was ready to do the work a little later, so you have no scope to complain. You should also understand that a teenager's brain is under development and during this period it is natural for them to behave rudely some times, as matured parent, it is your turn to smoothen out such bumps in their life to make them pass through it as smooth as possible.

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