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Avatar universal

annoyed with family...

I'm 13wks and just told both sides of the family we are pregnant this past weekend. Everyone's is happy and excited for us,but idk if its me being stupid or what. I've never been the type who goes and posts my life and feelings on fb or tell everyone what I'm feeling. I have my good friends who i can talk to, but i never go and post my life on facebook bc theres no need for everyone to know my business. I hate being the center of attention. not my thing. My bfs sister is the opposite, she has to tell the whole world and everyone has 2 know her problems and feelings and she has a big mouth and if it wasn't bc we had to ask her to stay quiet my ultrasound pics and belly pics would be all over her fb by now... I get that she's excited for us, but if my bf and i don't do that, then i don't see why someone else should. Besides, if my bfs ex found out I'm prego, we probably be seeing her in court next month trying to get more $ from my bf as that's one of her main means of income. My boyfriend and in aren't rich, but we do ok and his ex is a money hungry girl who screw him over in their divorce and turn their daughter against him even though he's always been there for her and supports her since day 1. She's always looking for that opportunity to stick it to him and continues to use their daughter againts him. My bf and his sister are from a very small town where everyone knows ea other and everyones on everybodys business and most of them know his ex. If we allow this to happen the ex would find out in a second im prego and why go through this already?. I know i cnt hide it long, but i don't see why putting out there bc you're happy is going to help in any way. Dont get me wrong my sis in law is really nice and we get a long good, But she thinks I'm crazy n stuck up, and im avoiding to get fat (as if i can) and im trying to hide my pregnancy and "her baby" from the world and the family. She's even butt hurt we didn't tell her right away and I told my sister I was prego b4 she found out. I have little patience for these things, I think it's annoying and childish and idk how to tell her and I know she's already wanting to move into my house for a while to help me when the baby is born... but I don't see why she has the need to tell everyone on Facebook...
6 Responses
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9304548 tn?1409619763
I dont blame u not wanting her in YOUR business. And about the EX idk if this helps or not but I was getting child support from my ex for my daughter and once he had another baby with his wife now my child support order actually got lowered so I dont get as much lol. She cant get more if he has another baby.
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Avatar universal
I was just annoyed with her all weekend. She's so bored with her life that i guess she feels like posting everything on fb is going to get her attention from people and unfortunately it does. I'm not like that and she's the type that asks infront of everyone to see ur belly, I'm like I will when i get one, but what you see now is not a belly,but the damn hot cheetos and crap I've been eating in the past. I get on the scale everyday and weight myself. I've gained 1 lb in 3 mos, and not bc I'm unhealthy it's just that i've been eating right. Well, she claims I don't know and it is baby weight! Arguing with me that im wrong and how she noticed my lil belly b4 we even told her I was prego. I'm like u didn't notice anything bc you always just go with the flow of the conversation. If I said I lost 20 lbs u would of said you notice it too!! And no, by no means she's not moving in my house. She will visit when the baby is born, but at this rate I rather not sleep and get any help than to have to be in a pissed off mood in my own house. Ugh! I needed to vent haha... thank you! Lol
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
people are overstepping boundaries a lot with privacy this whole pregnancy and although it bothers me, I have no control over others. I can't help what they ask or what they say to anyone else. Unfortunately this battle will still be fought over and over. People think that this is something happening in their life so they want to share that, not realizing that it affects you and typically not understanding the issue of someone being more private. When they don't understand they don't care. Plus, you feel like you have to be confrontational over and over.
Really, the only thing you can do is guard yourself against what you don't want public against people you can't trust. If it becomes something on Facebook you can confront it but ultimately have to let it go if they refuse to comply.
As far as the ex, I can see anticipating the bad and doing what you can to protect yourself from that. I always wonder why ex's are so possessive and do what they can to make someone else miserable. However, things turn out as they may and you can only anticipate so much.
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8793709 tn?1409594060
That's exactly why I don't use Facebook (or Twitter, or Instagram, etc) in the first place !!  :-D

(... and I have a diploma in Digital Marketing)
Helpful - 0
9440890 tn?1415878121
You are completely in the right!  It isn't her business to share, it's yours. And it's up to you what, with who and when you share your business. She needs to relax.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am on your side,  mama! I will be 27 weeks tomorrow and refuse to post anything about my pregnancy on fb. To me, the people who see me and know me well, will know and do know I'm pregnant. I don't think it is anyone in my family or his family's right to post my business on fb. And she wants to move in?? I believe coming to visit is okay, but full blown moving in is a bit much. I feel like you should address the problem you're having with your bf and then come to her together, in a respectul, non aggressive way and explain your feelings. If she doesn't understand,  that's her loss. But do not budge on your comfortability.  I, also am having problems with my bf ex. She has not let him see his kids since she found out I was pregnant.  And always says it's because he's building a new family. He pays 650 a month in child support and buys everything they need on top of that, she is spiteful and ugly on the inside, often even telling him she hopes our child comes out still born. Although her actions hurt me at first, I have learned that ultimately,  that's her karma she has to deal with and now he is filing for visitation. I'm sorry you're going through this and will keep you in my thoughts.  ♡♡
Helpful - 0

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