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11294269 tn?1422402907

getting married?

Must wondering if any unmarried mothers planned on getting married. I am 11 weeks and have been with my boyfriend for a few years. Before the pregnancy, we discussed marriage, moved in together and started planning our life together. We were blessed with this little one amidst it all. I'm torn about getting married while pregnant. On one hand, I want to complete our family. Our love is strong and part of me doesn't want to wait to make it official. I'm comfortable with a courthouse wedding and After baby having a more traditional wedding. Another part of me thinks we should be saving all the money we can and not paying for a wedding. I also don't know if i want to be huge at my wedding (i treasure my soon to come bump, but it's not how i pictured my wedding). Any positive feedback is welcomed :)
24 Responses
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Avatar universal
We did both courthouse Then traditional religious ceremony separately. We were expecting then, but had other reasons to be legally married sooner than the planned wedding date. We didn't tell anyone either that we were already married and had a blast during our party a few months later. I'd do both again if I had to :)
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wow... That 1747 and other numbers person really needs to learn some manners.... I never said for the person who posted to do what I did... Wtf?!? I have not been engaged for 12 yrs, I have been with my man that long. I was only saying ppl do not have to be married to stay together. I hope ur children have better manners than u!!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My husband and I didn't get married until our son was three years old, this past summer. We wanted to save up enough to have the wedding we wanted without going into debt to do it, and had a lot of more pressing things to do in the meanwhile (I went to nursing school and started a new career, among other things). We had started planning for another baby during our wedding planning and I ended up being eight weeks pregnant at our wedding - not enough to be showing of course so all of our pictures look exactly as they would have if I hadn't conceived when I did. Which was a really good thing for preservation of mostly positive memories, since I miscarried a month later.
We could have gotten married before our son was born but we decided not to even though we knew perfectly well we were very happy and madly in love. It wasn't the right time for us and we didn't want to try to rush the planning for a wedding before I got an enormously huge belly. We were busy enough, stressed enough with planning and preparing to add to our family - that would've added more time-consuming crazy stressful complications to our life at that point.
I didn't want a courthouse marriage. I didn't want to cave to outside pressure to "make it legitimate" or whatever - we weren't inferior parents just because we weren't married at our child's birth, there weren't any legal issues, we were both on the birth certificate just as married parents would be... I didn't see anything wrong with not being "official". I wanted it to happen when we wanted it, when we were ready, when we could put it all together in just the right way for us. Our son made an absolutely precious ring bearer and our day was perfect. I wouldn't have had it any other way.
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Avatar universal
Meant to say husband and I.
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Avatar universal
When I got pregnant, My now husband had been engaged for less than a year. However we have been together for a while. We wanted to get married next year, but we just went and got married two months ago.  As long as you two care about each other, being pregnant and getting married shouldn't matter.  It's all about what you want for your family.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My hubby and I were not married when we had our first son he purposed when we found out we were expecting. i told him I did not want to get married just because we were having a baby so we waited untill our son was 18 months old he purposed agine and we got married on Feb. 14th 2009 we have been together since we were seniors in high school we now have three beautiful kids and one on the way. You don't have to get married to have a family :)
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Avatar universal
On our 5 yr anniversary, except now our little baby will be joining us, which we originally didn't expect to have by then.  We are extremely happy with how things have turned out this far and wouldn't change anything.  I say if u guys want to have a courthouse wedding, then I would say got for it, u guys r cementing ur commitment for each other, and can continue to build ur family together as a unified married couple.  I'm pro marriage, if u know this is the man u want to build ur life with and have a family, y wait?  seal the deal... :).
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I had a court house wedding as well.  There's nothing wrong with it.  My husband and I actually eloped.  It was me, him, and my 4 yr old son at the time.  We got married and then went to lunch, and then drove to our beach house at the time.  Here we are still married almost 4.5yrs later and now we're having our first child together.  We were planning a vow renewal at
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Another option is to have a family member get ordained and they can marry you two. Do the reception at a family members house. Ask for all the help you can get. I agree with the professional photographer or someone really good. Do what is "you" when it comes to a wedding not what you are "supposed" to do or everyone thinks you should. Another option is if you do wait the little one can be a ring bearer or flower girl :)
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My fiance and I had planned our wedding and already booked our venue two months before learning that we were expecting. Although I was initially upset, since I'm due 3 weeks after! We still plan on having our wedding. I know that it changes some things, but I don't mind having a belly on my big day. It is just another representation of our love on the day we already planned on sharing the joy of our love with everyone else :)
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My fiance and I are going to the court house as well with family and close friends. Then we're going out to eat afterwards. We will renew or vows later on down the road, God spare life. I do agree on having someone photograpghing the event or even recording it, because even if you do decide to renew your vows, you'll have memories and keepsakes from the first moment you said "I do"
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Me and my now husband had been together for almost 5 years, he proposed, a nd just after the engagement party we found out that God had different family plans for us...we had already planned the whole wedding for Oct 3 2015 (and I mean invitations ordered with date on it, all vendors booked for that date). We decided after finding out that we did want to get married before our little bundle of joy entered the world. But you must remember the decision is for the two of you to make together, listen to others advice but do what is right in your heart. I was 3 months along when we got married (Oct 3 2014
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9764007 tn?1405807828
I think that was rude to say.. All she tried to do was give an opinion her insight what ever you want to call it.. All you had to say was you agree with the court house wedding..
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Avatar universal
Don't listen to the 12yrs engagement chic...just do the court wedding for now, make it legal since you were already planning on getting married before your blessing started baking. My husband and I did the same with 3 witnesses. It was so peaceful.  I wish you the best
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Don't listen to the 12yrs engagement chic...just do the court wedding for now, make it legal since you were already planning on getting married before your blessing started baking. My husband and I did the same with 3 witnesses. It was so peaceful.  I wish you the best
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I think courthouse would be the best option for now. Just take few of the family members or friends and get married in the court. Like someone mentioned earlier,  you can do big wedding once everything is settled down and you are financially stable
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Avatar universal
I'd =  if
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Avatar universal
My uncle has a weenie roast every year, and he is a minister, so we crashed his roast and got married the same day in his back yard. Everyone was already getting together there anyway so it worked out. Found a cheapo dress on clearance for $16 and hubby wore a button up and sweater vest. Another family member made a cake. It was laid back and easy. I was 6 months. I'd definitely say save all your money for baby, no need to waste so much money on a few hours of stress.  Do see I'd you can get a photographer or some professional images though, maybe a friend who is really good? You'll want to capture the moment no matter what you end up doing.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
We did courthouse wedding, but had the judge come to our home to perform the ceremony, where we had about 15 family members and my mom made dinner afterwards. It was very intimate. I think it's only like 100 dollars extra to have the judge perform the ceremony at your location.
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11294269 tn?1422402907
Advice was well received :) did you guys have a dinner or anything after the courthouse?
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Avatar universal
We did courthouse wedding as well. Don't need all that pressure and stress of a big wedding during pregnancy..  But wanna make it official. Like others mentioned, do anniversary big wedding later.
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Avatar universal
Hubby and I did courthouse. Ain't nothing wrong with it! Save your $$ and enjoy planning your perfect day for later on. You'll be glad you did :)
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Avatar universal
My fiance and I were planning our wedding for 2015 and now we r expecting.. We have been together almost 13 yrs with a 12 yr old... What's another few yrs lol. I think it doesn't matter when u do it, either way u will b together :) but if u feel the need to then do a courthouse ceremony and reception after baby is born :)
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Do the courthouse. Then maybe a vow renewal around 5 year? Or on your 1 year anniversary.
Helpful - 0

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