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horrible father inlaw?!

Yesterday me&my boyfriend told his father that we expecting he didn't really seem phased by it but today me&my boyfriend went with his father to do some work and he took us to the abortion clinic and told us that we either get an abortion or he will buy the pill online and will put it in my food so that I get the abortion that way. He then barged me in the stomach when I refused to walk in there. The thing is we haven't asked for any of his help, the only thing we asked for was his support and he seems to think his support is trying to black mail me into having an abortion?
I've told him that it has probably come as a shock to him but he said he already knew?!
I honestly don't know what to do? I'm definitely not getting an abortion but I just don't see how he can be like that.
Should I just tell him that if he isn't willing to support us and that he wants his first grandchild dead then he doesn't have to be involved with the child?!

25 Responses
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13167 tn?1327194124
If your boyfriend is self-sufficient and working,  i really don't see how you can blame this monster of a man for your boyfriend breaking up with you.

He does sound like a bossy busy body,  but your boyfriend was willing to send you packing from your home you share with him.

That's who I'd blame.
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
Well, it is unfortunate.  I do think that as a parent, you worry about a 19 year old having a child.  It's young.  But once someone is pregnant, you figure it out.  But I must say, your boyfriend must not have been very committed to listen to them.  I'm sorry about that.  Hopefully you have family on your side.  good luck
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Nope, he just believes we are ruining our lives because we are 19. We have our own place, my boyfriend works I'm in university studying, should be finished by the time the baby is here
They don't think its fair that we are having a baby cos apparently it puts stress on them. They are selfish and only care about themselves and spending loads of alcohol to have a good time.

Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Seriously why? That is ridiculous....  is his dad that controlling and obviously mentally ****** up.. I'm so sorry about this.
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Avatar universal
Some people are just that way. I'm sorry to hear that though. I hope you and your baby the best.
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973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
Wow, I'm sorry to hear that.  There's nothing else going on to cause such a big reaction?  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Turns out my boyfriends father has persuaded my boyfriend so he broke up with me. I'm on my way back to my home state to live with my parents.
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Avatar universal
Thats a stupid reason. There are plenty of people out in this world under the age of 28 havin babies and do just fine. Its your life, your babies, and you've already said you're not getting an abortion. So just ignore him and do for you and your growing family.
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
Well, if you two are adults, stable financially, living on your own and not at home and not teens, then this is an odd response to a pregnancy.  What's the deal with age 28?  I could see a parent being upset that the landscape of their kid's life and future was going to change dramatically due to an unplanned pregnancy but that is more when someone is a teen, just starting out and not quite in a stable place (or in college, those kinds of things).  Do you work too?  Do you two live together?  Is it because you aren't married?  Is he religious--- well, probably not if he is wanting you to get an abortion.  

Just seems like an over the top response and I'm wondering what I'm missing.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
His son works full time, his father just doesn't agree with a baby being brought into this world by someone under the age of 28
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
Well, he definitely should not lay his hands on you.  He has a right to be upset and to ask his son to convince you to have an abortion if he truly feels it is a bad idea for the two of you to have a baby---  that's unfortunate, but not like hitting someone in the stomach.

He seems very opposed to this baby.  Is his son in college, a working man?  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I think you can press charges for threatening your childs life by him stating that he will buy the pill and put it in your food. There was a story in the news about a boyfriend doing that to his girlfriend and I think they charged him with murder, it happened a year ago I think. (Could be wrong though). But yes stay far far away. To me it doesnt sound like you guys are living with him, and if you are you need to run away before he does something even more drastic. Even of he were to get those pills and somehow slipped it into your food, praying he doesn't,  and you end up loosing the baby. Press charges for murder (I believe you can because it was your intention of keeping the pregnancy), and receiving medication from an unlicensed professional. Its a crime to administer drugs of any kind without a prescription. And later in life thats your choice of letting him in or not. Me personally would never go near the ******* again. Good luck, keep yourself safe.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
OMG that Sick, I'm so sorry your boyfriends dad is doing this...  sorry but I would never ever trust him around my child. Even ten Years from now..  people are aloud to not be to happy about a baby coming but that's taking it to far saying that.. ik my father isn't gonna be thrilled but he would never say that and my dad's a real piece of work. he obviously has major mental issues.. so no stay far away from him as you can.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Call the police and have it documented so if anything does happen, your baby will get the justice he/she deserves! !!!!!
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Avatar universal
I would go around him at all
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Avatar universal
If you want this baby then its ablout about that child now not you are your husband /boyfriend or whoever
You need to do what you can to protect your child and yourself the first step is to see a GYN or go to ER and say what he did to you and want an ultrsound done and to be checked and also you will like them to call the police. Because of he attract you and your unborn and is trying you drug your food and drinks with pills to kill your baby !
Helpful - 0
9309185 tn?1420228764
What did your boyfriend do in response to this? I would stay away, but I wouldn't do quickly write him out of the child's life. For your safety stay away but he could come around once the child is here
Helpful - 0
9634886 tn?1405819605
stay far far far away from him....he sounds like a terrible unsupportive(obviously) jerk. i hope you dont live with him....and if you dont do not let him in your home. and yes what did your bf do or say? you should call an officer or go in and see if they can do anything. this guy deserves no part of yours or this sweet babies life!!!!
Helpful - 0
10844008 tn?1414461825
Wat did your bf do/say?
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Avatar universal
I would call the cops, honestly. You can definitely press charges and I really dont think thats over reacting considering he threatened you and your childs life.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Don't think I've disliked someone as much as I do him. I've said to him that if he can't learn to support us with his grandchild then he won't be seeing it/hearing about it. I called my doctor and she said asking as I get no cramping/bleeding then I don't need to worry until my next appointment. The police have been called and they have given us a crime number and have told us that if he comes near me to ring them and they'll remove him off the property.




Helpful - 0
9801256 tn?1412729114
Wtf don't bother with him
Don't visit him
Don't even let him near you that's shocking its completely you're choice if you want to have this baby or not what an idiot his first grandchild and he should miss out on so much you should let you're boyfriend know how angry you are!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Stay very far away a away from him and there is no if he isn't willing to support yall he doesn't have to have is 1st grandchild in his life the child should never be in his life period there is no choice for him and I wouldn't care if down the line he says he has changed I wouldn't trust him around me or my child stay away
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Yes tell him that and stay away from him! (Dont eat his food either) he is sick ! You dont need him or the negitivity in your life. Its bad for you and the baby and you never know if he'll try to pull some funny buisness. Stay away !
Helpful - 0
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13167 tn?1327194124
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