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11515243 tn?1427129031

my friend .. help?..

My friends bf has been talking to his ex behind her back her whole pregnancy he told her all his ex talks about is her boyfriend. & he recently told her that he don't want to be with her anymore . I have no idea what advice to give her....
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134578 tn?1693250592
I would be glad to be proven wrong, but he probably won't stay with her forever if he doesn't have feelings for her, even if he cares about the baby.  When reality hits, she should see a lawyer.  Paying child support is a legal obligation to the child, a guy does not get out of it by saying "I will help" (or by getting mad.  My husband gets mad about having to pay taxes, it does not change the laws.)  

If she thinks he will go, she should propose they go to couples counseling.  Maybe they can work it out.
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11515243 tn?1427129031
They've been together for 2 years so it wasn't a one night stand or anything. And he staying with her just because of the baby and he says he wants to be in his child's life. And he gets mad if she says anything about child support he says he will help her. She's just heart broken because she didn't see it coming that he wasn't happy anymore. And she just found out he has been talking to his ex
Helpful - 0
134578 tn?1693250592
Tell her --  if he says he does not want to be with her any more, and talks to his ex all the time, it is wise for her to believe him and move on with her life at least as far as thinking he is her "boyfriend" is concerned.  She should talk to a lawyer about what is required to file for child support when the baby is born, and talk to her (not-)boyfriend about how much he expects to see the child, and she should be ready to file papers for child support the week the baby is born.

Girls sometimes think that just because they have gotten pregnant by some horndog, he and she are now inextricably a couple with a loving bond, or that her being pregnant will make him care about her.  This is confusing cause and effect.  Just because couples in love sometimes produce babies, it doesn't mean pregnancy creates love.  They are legally parents of a kid together, but that sounds like about it.  Nothing about adding a baby to the failed relationship will make a guy into someone who wants to be her boyfriend again.

Guys sometimes think they can have unprotected sex and just walk away with no responsibility to their child.  They can only do this if the woman is a patsy.  While they might be able to blow off the fiction that they are a loving boyfriend to the pregnant girl, they can't walk away from their legal right to their child unless the new mama doesn't even file for child support.

Tell her that no matter how sad it makes her that he is emotionally gone, well, he is.  What she should not do is let him get away with adding insult to injury and trying not to take responsibility for his child.  



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11515243 tn?1427129031
He hasn't been having sex with her either and keeps porn saved to his phone...
Helpful - 0

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