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Avatar universal

An i being a bad mom ?

My son is due April 8 2016 I'm going planning to leave to the military by October 2016 so he is only going to be 5-6 months when I leave. I feel that I'm leave him so little and I'm afraid he's not going to my to remember me when I come back and it makes me sad to know that I'm miss he's first step he's first and etc.
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Avatar universal
I agree with happymama2016. Dont leave ur baby 5 to 6 months thats too early to leave your baby. Those first few months a child should b with their mother. Ur not a bad mom but take into consideration of how your child will feel away from u. Noone can fill a mothers void but a mother. Something for u to think about hun.
Helpful - 1
Avatar universal
Don't leave ur child. Bonding is more important
Helpful - 1
Avatar universal
I am in the military and currently pregnant and I plan on getting out the service so I can do for my child. My husband is also in as well so I can do what I need to do for our little boy. You have plenty of options I think it depends on what you want to do but I know I want to be their for mines so I am choosing to get out
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My sister in law went through this about 30 years ago and she had no choice. Her mom took care of her boy for a year and she communicated with letters, photos, and phone. It was tough for her but he grew up to be a responsible and handsome young who also served. She mustered through and they both survived. Her son loves her no less because of it. Good luck to you and thank you for your service.
Helpful - 0
13167 tn?1327194124
Maybe I misunderstood.  Are you being deployed in October,  and you don't have a choice except to quit with a less than honorable discharge?

Or are you planning to join the military in October and you aren't in the military yet?

If you're joining in October,  don't,  IMHO.  If you don't have a choice,  you don't have a choice.
Helpful - 0
9812003 tn?1452545539
It was tough for my sister and her girls,  but they survived and they knew who she was,  we used pictures and traveled to her when we could. I believe it's tough but not insurmountable.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wow, brave woman. Not a bad mom at all. I assume you're a pretty tough lady, something I am not lol. So I don't know how hard you might find leaving your baby. Like the lady above said, technology is your friend here and nothing will ever break your bond, it's for life. Good luck and thank you x
Helpful - 0
13167 tn?1327194124
"Being a bad mom" would imply you have any choice in this.  You don't have a choice.

You need to use technology to keep in touch with your baby while you're gone - if you can't be in contact with him,  film a lot of you talking to him,  reading to him,  singing to him.  Your family will have to be involved in keeping your personality there in the home until you return.

Best wishes.  This is hard.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You are not a bad mom
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Also, you're coming back your for your baby. Have you seen in the news these awful women that leave them at a subway bathroom, shallow grave still alive, or worse... You're not being a bad mother. Do what you need to do to support your family
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You're not being a Bad Mother! A Bad Mother is neglecting your child because you don't want the responsibility! Which is definitely not you! You're fighting for our country...you're wanting to provide for your child! There is always Skype...FaceTime so he can see you and hear your voice! Pictures and recording all the first time experiences your son will do. That will help you feel closer to your son! I'm praying for you and your family and don't ever feel like you're a Bad Mother because you're the Best Mother that any child can have!!!! God Bless you sweetie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Honestly, lots of countries other than US gives bonding time for mother and baby up to year. If you plan on serving your country, I commend for that and thank you. Many of my friends are in the military, army, etc.

If you can extend the time you before you enter, it would be optimal so you can bond as much as possible and breastfeed etc. It's tough, but your doing what you need to do for your baby. You're not being a bad mother. Keep in mind, you will miss those things, hopefully someone can video then for you.
Helpful - 0

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