Just need a woman's point of view

[leahmoriah15]

Hi ladies. This isn't baby related. I just need the advice of another woman. I am going through a situation with my boyfriend who is also the father of my  unborn child. About four months ago I saw where he and a coworker of his were texting and I came and cross a few texts that were disrespectful. I mentioned it to him and he assured me that he had handled the situation. In October as I was going through our phone bill I saw that he and this same coworker had texted a lot, sometimes starting as early as 7 am and as late as 12am. He and I got into a big argument and he admitted that he deleted the texts because he knew I would be upset and admitted that at times they had gotten disrespectful. He called her and told her they could no longer talk. Fast forward to November and and I get the bill and check it to see if he kept his word. Unfortunately he hadnt. They exchanged 1200 texts from the date that he claimed he told her they could no longer talk. We got into yet another argument and I explained that I felt betrayed because I made it clear that I didn't trust the situation and asked him to stop and he blatantly lied about doing so. He claimed he was going to let her know. I saw where they were still exchanging texts late that night and I took all of his things to his house and told him I was done. He said sorry etc but I was done. The next day he calls and I go over there and we talk and he promises to leave it alone. He deleted her number and I asked him to delete her off Facebook which he did. We are currently trying to rebuild our relationship but last week I saw where they are friends again on facebook. I feel that this is a slap in my face and that he feels that her feelings are more important than mine or maintaining contact with her in a more important. Any advice???? Sorry so long

[MrsJake]

I went through this situation myself with my son's bio dad... believe me when I say enough is enough. Cheating isn't limited to physical contact but also emotional. If he honestly had to delete and hide those messages then obviously that girl and him are having an inappropriate contact. If you and your baby are not priorities now then chances are you will never be. At this point, I suggest you don't go back. It will suck and hurt and at times you might feel weak and want to give in but believe me the future will be brighter with Less stress and worry about what he's doing and concentrate on you and baby. I'm wishing you the best of luck no matter what you decide.

[bestmotherof3]

I would say leave him alone I mean yes we all want the father of our child and to be that happy family but you know when something isn't right its not right && if he's continuously lying dead to your face getting caught and lying obviously he doesn't Care and him and this girl has feelings for each other and you don't deserve to be treated that way.

[MzGatez]

I'm so sorry to hear this. I went thru something similar with my babys father recently. Unfortunately, I found out that it was a full on sexual relationship with this woman. Being the hard head that I am, I called her myself. Needless to say, they haven't spoken since then. But even tho, I gave him another chance, I am now 11 weeks pregnant and still with him, I still can not forget the infidelity. I am dreaming about it and stress off of it alot. I know he is sorry for what hes done, and I don't believe he would ever do it again, I still have that doubt. I have decided to try to move past it for our baby, I think my baby deserves that. But the difference between him and your babys father, is that he admitted and realized he was wrong and hasn't contacted her again. I feel a leopard can not change his spots and your ex is making that evident. Do what YOU feel is right for YOUR situation. Noone can tell u whats best. None of us have actually walkes in your shoes. But we can be here for advice and support. My best wishes to you and your unborn baby. And I hope he finds the error in his ways.

[laur23]

Congratulations on your pregnancy and don't ever let a man think your his door mat. No female deserves that.  Especially w all the chances you have gave him after he kept talking to her. Like have some respect dude your girlfriend is carrying your unborn child.

[laur23]

I'm sorry girl but he's cheating on you...  some people are pigs and want the best of both world's. Screw a break why would you want to get back w someone who is clearly cheating on you? Sorry but he should be texting you that early and late.. my ex did that and tired to say because we were new to the state he was finding friends for me lmao..  long story short he was screwing her the whole time.  

[jessicaeden13]

Cheating isn't always kissing, touching, or flirting. It's a conversation that you wouldn't want your partner to see cause they would misunderstand. That's cheating. I know exactly what you're going through.

[ninak01]

In my opinion you should not give him more chances because in the past you have given him chances and he has done same mistake again and again. So the best solution is leave him. You dont need the stress while u r pregnant because u nd ur baby dont deserve it. He should be ashamed of himself because he is cheating on u, he should be looking after u nd the unborn baby. I would leave him now because once ur baby arrives u dont want ur child to suffer as well. He does not deserve u or the baby.

[jennnmike22]

I wouldn't trust him either. If he's lied once and twice & more don't trust him. Believe me u don't need a man to raise a baby &you deserve better don't feel the need that u wanna stay for the baby because if u do you'll get hurt worser throughout your life with him &keep on finding more stuff. See it like this if plenty of women can be single mom's u can do it too :) & if he keeps on saying sorry n keep messing up then he doesn't regret what he does cause he obviously keeps on disrespecting u and the baby so think for both of yall :)

[1NAMILLION]

Where there's smoke, there's fire. Your bf is being dishonest and they clearly have more going on than he's divulging. I'm so sorry that you are having to endure this, pregnancy is difficult enough and you don't need him adding to that; so, you definitely should consider officially calling this relationship a wrap for the sake of you and your unborn child. I know the divide will hurt but it is best since he cannot get his priorities together....if workplace flirtation means more, let him have it because that has unfortunately take precedent over his family. On this decision you will have to show him just how much you love and respect you and baby and that if he can't do the same he needs to dismiss himself from your life.

Side note: Feel free to express whatever you need to on this app, either a person will answer or not but to the super extremely hormonal ******* woman that mentioned that this isn't what this app is about....the category pregnancy social is precisely for these things. You are pregnant and in need of support regardless of the topic.

Best wishes, congrats on baby and I hope everything works out.

[brkness]

Um thats a major issue, obviously he has something for her and can't let go. You should be number one priority!!! U need to let him go when you do you'll see what choice he makes and that will give you the answer to what you should do.

[MrsHarris2009]

He obviously does not respect your feelings. ***** that you're pregnant by him but this isn't about you anymore. Think about the environment you will be raising the baby in. Arguing and tension is not what you need. Leave him alone. It will get easier with time. And I'm sick of certain people trying to say this isn't the place for posts like this. Some people come here for support because they have nowhere else to go. I had a bunch of haters jump on me a while back for a post.

[happymomtobe2]

Just cut him loose, hes been disrespecting
You all. Along and and ur baby deserve better.

[happybaby2015]

@leahmoriah15 you're welcome & best wishes hun!

[91512]

Just raise your child together and call it a day . He clearly is no good and does not care about your emotional feelings nor your trust . And if he doesn't care if you trust him , then there is no relationship . Get out while you can before you have more kids and waste more time . Because flirting is the first step , how can you be sure he hasn't taken it further ?

[leahmoriah15]

Thanks. I've pretty made up my mind to give us a break for a while so that I can focus on myself and the baby. This is causing me more stress than I need right now. The people who I have talked to in my life are trying to convince me to stay for the sake of the baby, but I am full at this point. Thank you all for validating my position and for the encouragement.

[bnl0725]

My advice is to walk away. He's never going to be someone you can trust.

[happybaby2015]

You gave him multiple chances to stop this inappropriate relationship so now you must act or he'll always know you're just giving empty threats. I'm sure you love him & want to work it out but I know you want a trustworthy, faithful partner so leave him for a period of time, focus on yourself, & move on like you could care less about him. For some reason when we show we don't care then they come begging & crawling back like puppies. You have to be strong for awhile & then take him back if he's proved by actions that he's changed. He'll realize she isn't worth ruining his family over.

[saramay2014]

I wouldnt trust him....

[Mimilove3]

If he cant respect YOU and BABY u dont need him in your lives. He's the one losing 2 important people. So chin up u are capable of raising that precious baby :-) if he decides to leave that girl then hes showing that u 2 are far more important...

[ohmitout]

But you can't wait on him to change if he keeps up.. I'd leave him if he does my abide by your ultimatum

[ohmitout]

Ouch.. You could ask him why he feels the need to do this like is he unhappy in your relationship for a reason you don't know about? If thats a dead end, since you've already went through the motions of confronting him and he knows you don't agree with it, I think it's ultimatum time that you won't stand for this bull**** and you have a baby on the way so he has to smarten up. With him wanting to talk it does sound like he wants you.

In the past I have also confronted the girl in similar situations because she is in the wrong as well and maybe she doesn't know the situation or that he's a taken man. That either goes where she plays dumb or you have to get mean. Haha

[leahmoriah15]

Thanks ladies. I appreciate the insight. My emotions are in overdrive especially with this pregnancy and I really needed the support of another person. I don't associate with many females so I truly appreciate the response.

[isabela2]

This is an app relate to baby but it is also somewhere where we can vent about our problems since all us girls can offer advice. Ann's we all know how we feel since we are all pregnant.  I say leave him that is so disrespectful especially after deleting her and then them going back to being friends again! Both are not respecting you at all leave his @$$! He is not worth it! He should be the most considerate ever since Ur pregnant and he is doing this to you while you are carrying his baby he is not worth it!

[mylittlemiracle418]

Foul me once shame on you. Foul me twice shame on me. That is a slap in your face! Me and my ex went through problems and we agreed that we both delete our facebook pages. And thats exactly what happened.currently to this day I don't have mine (Almost 2 years).were not together now but we still see eachother like we are. He has his. But i think we moved past all that stuff. So I dont ever say anything. Im a very forgiving person but after so much you just cant deal with it. You gave him a chance and im sorry to say but there is more to the story then what hes saying. If your anything like me. I would have called that number already and if shes a real women she will be honest. Good Luck with everything