No baby shower VENT

[Babyweathers15]

So I originally thought I wasn't going to have a baby shower so I took matters into my own hands and tried to have a get together of my own. I told people a month in advance and at first it looked like there would be decent amount of people showing up and now last minute literally EVERYONE cancelled on me so I just decided to cancel it. I'm so heartbroken and feel like the biggest loser ever. It seems like everytime I plan something people always have an excuse not to show up. I've bawled all evening about it. I'm done trying.

[ribaby15]

I feel like I'll be in this boat when the time comes.
I have a 5yr old, and never had a shower with her and obviously she's 5... I've gotten rid of everything over time as I could to make room for other stuff. Like, getting rid of her crib and updating to a toddler bed, getting rid of the toddler bed to get a big girl single sized mattress, etc. Why would I save an infant car seat for 5+yrs... ? lol.
I'm 10wks now and my 'friends' have said they're going to throw me one, but I'm not holding my breath. I'm the type of person to go to all the birthday parties, etc. While NONE of them come to MY kids... But it's like, do I want my daughter to miss out on sh*t like that just because I'm pi$$ed off? :\ hard to say.
sorry our friends s*ck, lol.

[Babyweathers15]

I agree with you on that!

[alicesaidwhat]

I tried planning my own shower since none of my friends could be bothered with planning it. I asked them for help a month in advance and the week before, they started flaking on me.
So literally 3 days before my shower I just said **** IT and cancelled it.
This is my first child, so I'm pretty disappointed that my loser friends couldn't keep their **** together for this ONE thing.
I say that something like this kind of shows you not necessarily who your real friends are, but how far YOU should go for them. They can still be your friends, but you don't owe them any favors going forward.

[RockRose]

Babyweathers,   since this has happened before to you with other events,  you probably need to figure out why this is happening.  In some circles,  2nd baby showers are really not the norm,  and it's not the norm to host your own in most circles,  so maybe that had something to do with it.  Although I do see girls on these forums hosting their own showers and raking in the goods.

Sometimes,  things honestly just happen where a lot of people get sick,  their car breaks down,  they have an unplanned trip out of town,  they have a sick child.  So that's just a shame and it can happen.

But if you sense that your friends aren't reliable friends who want to come share your joy,  it's time to find new friends or find out what's happening in these relationships where they go to each other's stuff but not to yours.

Best wishes.  This must feel so lonely.

[Babyweathers15]

Yes!!! I completely agree and feel the exact same way girl!

[Kathy2015]

It bothers me for 2 reasons. It was as if these people were saying they had too much else to pay for and I was being greedy or something and second, like they don't care to celebrate my new child. It's like a penalty for deciding to have another child.

[Babyweathers15]

I'm in the exact same situation Kathy2015 my first child was 8 years ago and we are starting all over again! I'm 35 weeks tomorrow and have nothing but a few outfits for her! I'm so stressed out,heartbroken,mad ect.

[Kathy2015]

All I did was inquire about having a baby shower and I was shut down. I was repeatedly told I shouldn't have one because this isn't my first baby. But I haven't had a baby in 8 years! I got rid of everything so I needed EVERYTHING! Ugh...

[tara86]

I'm sorry to hear this. That's so horrible. I would definitely let people know how disappointed you were. It's not fair! You don't need to go off, but expressing your feelings may trigger a few of them to clean their act up. But that's just what i would do. I have a sister in law who has had that happen to and i was the only one that showed up and we don't even get along! It's a dreadful feeling. Chin up and just remember you're blessed to be given a beautiful baby that will love you so much. xo

[Mimilove3]

Maybe they cancelled because they might be planning a surprise. Hopefully thats it. Chin up though.

[Babyweathers15]

I'm trying to keep myself from blowing up on people! But I will remember this when they invite me to something of theirs!

[sbenson]

I am so sorry that happened to you. It's unfortunate that people arent more considerate especially with all the pregnancy hormones we have going on anyways. When we had mine only extended family came and none of my friends showed up. It made me upset and made me feel like i didn't have any real friends. I still had a good shower though.  If i were in your shoes I'd be having a hard time not telling people how rude and hurtful that was to you.

[Babyweathers15]

Thanks girls. It's really hard not to get discouraged when people are so flakey :(. I honestly don't even want to attempt planning another event because I feel like I'm setting myself up for disappointment again. This isn't the first event of mine that this has happened to. Everyone wants people to show up to their parties but don't feel like they have to make an appearance to anyone else's.

[tiaspilchuk4]

I would definitely have a "baby's here" party!  Plan it for a month after babys jere so your well into routine,  theres no way people are not gonna not come...everybody loves baby snuggles! And also it will be easier for everyone to buy gifts becuse you'll know the sex of the baby and what size to buy!  Dont get discourage,  throw a party after babys born!

[Mommabanielle]

I'm sorry. Last July I planned a baby shower for my little sister. I was in the middle of moving out of state at the time and let family know three weeks in advance, my older sister was supposed to get the actual invites out but didn't until a week before. I hand made all of the decorations, my older sister cleaned up her house and sent her kids to the sitter and my mom spent all day making food and dessert. No one showed. One person called before hand and said she wouldn't make it. I called three of my aunts to see if we should wait for them but they all said they thought it was the next week. I was so upset and felt like I ruined my little sister's shower by not being able to plan it better. I can't imagine how crappy it made her feel. My grandmother was the only person who showed up. I'm sorry your shower didn't work out. Maybe try for a welcome home baby party? Maybe that will get more attention or work better with people's schedule. Good luck. I'm sorry you had to deal with that.