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Avatar universal

No longer good role model!

Got "fired" as a youth group counselor at my church because I am pregnant and not married and they don't want the kids to think that this is appropriate behavior! I am so mad! I couldn't believe that! I put my time and energy every week into something I don't even get paid for and I love these kids! Really upset right now!
29 Responses
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Avatar universal
@breynolds you are 100% completely accurate! There are many of the girls that go to my church as well as serve at my church that are having sex! They are young just as I am and sometimes things happen but I am the one who is put down for it and thrown out because the consequences of my actions actually showed through and theirs didn't!
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Avatar universal
@mrsrogers thank you for your kindness my faith will be with me no matter what and I will follow God no matter where I go! I am fully aware that what I have done is a sin but it's like you said God knew long before I did that I would become pregnant so I have to know that this was in his plan for me!
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Avatar universal
Truth be told they are having sex outside marriage as well. Churches are too hypocritical
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Avatar universal
I completely understand the difference. Just like some don't know the difference between praise and worship. We all are living in sin, we are sinners who are forgiving by God. After we repent it means we are to turn from our wicked ways. I had a baby before marriage and I know God has forgiving me but after repenting I chose to not do it again till I was married and thats when I had more kids. Just because we fall short doesn't mean we should be criticized especially from those who are just as we are and no better. The bible says we are all created equal and in Gods own image so before we even existed our life was written out for us. God knew she would be pregnant before marriage because he wrote it out. As well as I, so jordy you go to church for YOU and no one else. God loves you and knows your heart just don't let this steer you from your faith. :)
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Avatar universal
Mrs.Rogers.. How wonderful that your church is so accepting of people from all walks of life and even better that they have found a place in the church. That's a great way to spread the message of God to EVERYONE. Everyone is at a different place in their journey and how can we say we are followers of Christ without learning to love without judgement, right? However,  I'm sure you've heard the saying "Going to church doesn't make you anymore a Christian than standing in a garage makes you a car." Same applies for the example we set at christians. If you take on a role as a leader to our young people it is your job to set an example for them. If you teach children the word of God but do not live by that word, what message are you giving to the children you teach? There is a huge difference between sinning and living in sin. Most of us can't seem to differentiate the two.  
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Avatar universal
This is very sad, I understand part of what they're saying but to fire you is absurd. In my church there are lesbians, homosexuals, unwed mothers and the church welcomes them with open arms and juat about everyone in my church has a duty. Be it teaching bible study, sunday school,  cooking in the kitchen, being a usher. We don't shut anyone out. Honey this is what you do, "Pray for them" pray for your pastor. Yes sex before marriage is a sin but God doesn't judge you so why should they. If they were true followers of Jesus they wouldnt have done that. Just remember that Jesus loves you, you can't see him but he's right there beside you telling you everything is okay. I get so overjoyed when I think about his love for us, its never ended. Stay blessed hun. Sorry its so long...lol
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Avatar universal
This is why I find organized religion to be the biggest absurdity to ever be created. They are just groups of people who believe in the same "magical" nonsense and use it as an excuse to judge everyone else.
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Avatar universal
I'm sorry to say this, but the truth is that God does not approve of sex outside of marriage. Given that you were working 'for God' you have not represented Him well. So it is understandable that your church got quite upset with you. But having said that, God is also a loving and forgiving Father, who would not shun you for getting pregnant. However you do owe God an apology for having sex out of marriage. After that, forgive your church members - though you shouldn't blame them for a mistake you did. You should be willing to see, and respect, their point of view,  as well. Then you need to also forgive yourself. God bless!
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Avatar universal
If none of you can see where this church is coming from than I think the problem is your own. Getting pregnant out of wedlock is a sin. That doesn't just apply to biblical times, that means that God has said that we (all of us) are to be married before we have sex and when someone in a leadership role sets an example contradicting the law that God put in place, you should no longer be in that role. None of us are perfect and the only one who can judge us is God and one day we will all me judged on our works but This matter has NOTHING to do with judging her and everything to do with teaching the word of God. I think she can see that they were just in firing her even if she's mad about it.
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8908480 tn?1417916904
When I got pregnant with my first child, I was embarrassed and didnt want to go to church due to I wasnt married. My first lady embraced me and told me that the act I had done was a sin,but babies are a blessing because we are here to be fruitful and multiply. Everyone sins but mines was just more obvious because I had a belly compared to those who were doing things behind closed doors. Dont lose your faith and thats probably not the ministry you need to be in, God is awesome and will continue to be with you. New things are in store for you.
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Avatar universal
This is crazy!! Sometimes the church can have the meanest ppl. It's crazy how a place of worship and joy can be turned into something so negative because of the ppl. I've heard a story similar to one of the other moms that posted, a women wanted her son to be baptized but they wouldn't do it because she wasn't married. He would only do it in private and not with the other children smh! Good luck with your pregnancy and dnt lose your faith because of this there are plenty of churches with good ppl who dnt act that way!
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Avatar universal
That is crazy! We are to love and accept no matter what not to judge and abandon. My church and youth pastor did the same to a boy in my youth group. He supposedly did something with another girl that was a minor and was supposedly in trouble for, even though nothing happened, and he already came from a bad olace and really needed people there for him to just love him and talk to him you know, like just to be there. But what did the church do? They told him to leave and never come back. A few months later we learned he killed himself and everyine couldnt understand why??? Because no kne was there for him in his time of need instead they just turned their backs in him, which is what your church is doing to you, its rediculous. If God didn't want to bless you with a lil baby then he wouldnt have but he did and even that you(i did as well) went against His word he still gave you this little blessing
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6926872 tn?1386186835
that was not right what they did at all. a true christian will support you no matter what and shouldn't make you feel uncomfortable about having a child. everyone has their own "sins" and should never look down on someone else when no one is perfect. i hope you either get your job back or find a better church that don't look at you like you're less than human.
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Avatar universal
I think it's an utter disgrace and I really feel for you x
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Avatar universal
Of course I did! They didn't care what I had to say they said it's the policy of the church not theres so I kind of just accepted it I don't need to get myself more worked up than I already was
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8870903 tn?1403153273
Did you try and talk to anyone to try and keep your job, or did you just walk out and accept what they had told you?
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6502237 tn?1396004798
Sorry about your church turning on you like that. My mom was Catholic and when she had my sister, she wanted to baptize her and the church wouldn't let her because she had a child by a man she wasn't married to. Then they called my sister a ******* child and said neither of us were welcomed back at the church. I'm not a religious person, my family is, but since then I thought most people of any church are ugly extremists.
That wasn't right what the church did to you, especially if you've dedicated a lot of your time to them and the kids there. Hope things get better for you.
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Avatar universal
If you really hated to say it you wouldn't have. I don't know why people say ... And it's not that I don't get where there coming from because I do. It's the fact that I am now shut out from something I have been involved in since I was 4! 16 years! And the way they did it hurt me really bad too! I'm sure you'd feel the same way if it happened to you! And then I'm sure you wouldn't beaking a statement like that. It doesn't make me a bad person things happen!
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Avatar universal
I am a single mom, so I'm not trying to bash on you for that. I am sorry you lost your youth kids as well.
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Avatar universal
I hate to be the one to say it, but it is setting a bad example to the kids to have a baby outside of marriage.. I think it is wrong what they did to you, but being a youth counselor/church staff means you're dedicating yourself to the church's core values and to leading the youth into the path of righteousness. If you were a regular church attendee, it wouldnt staffmatter.
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Avatar universal
I find people who go to Church can be very nasty. I go, pray then leave

after all i went through in my coomunity ive learnt noone is worth getting upset over

everyone just wants to be superior. Not a Christian environment at all
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7420616 tn?1401158804
I wish the church my sister goes to fired the young womens leader since she was sleeping around with my sisters husband...oh not to mention she was also my sisters best friend and all their kids are too!  Not a great example but I don't think having a baby out of wedlock is bad. I can sorta get where they are coming from but they are also supposed to be caring and not judgemental...not like you are their property!! Give it time maybe you will get your chance to go back and work with those kids :) stay positive
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Avatar universal
That's dumb. When has it been a sin or wrong to have a child out of wedlock ugh. Do you really want to represent a church that does that to their people??
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Avatar universal
So the example setting here instead is to turn your back and shun people? And the want to point fingers about role model quality? Ufgg. Im getting fired up on your behalf now.
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