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Avatar universal

Parenting issues

Kind of new here. I have a two year old daughter and I'm pregnant with another. (14 weeks 4 days) I don't have any problems being the single parent to my daughter and her father does next to nothing other than court ordered child support. The father to my unborn doesn't want a child, not right now, and I don't believe he will step up. With my daughters father he stressed me out, depressed, crying every night for most of the first year of her life and I don't want that to happen again. The few that are close to me know the father, agree with me, and told me that if I feel like I can make it happen on my own do it. Everyone else is hung up on "who's the baby daddy? Is he going to help? Do you know?" I feel if he doesn't want to be there don't stress me out trying to force him to grow up. How can I explain all that without going through everything in my past? I don't need everyone in my family life if they aren't going to help raise them.
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Avatar universal
Don't say you won't get anything because he has nothing. From what I understand, here in SC, even if the father is jobless at the time, the mother is still guaranteed at least $100 a month.

I'm not positive bc I'd rather not take my ex to court for child support. But I've been told that by many people.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I wouldn't get anything from him in child support because at current moment he has nothing. Not to deny the fact he is the father but eventually if he changes to actually care for this child I have no doubt his side of the family would help. I'm stressed even thinking about people and the opinions and advice they give. Even today I had to walk away from work just to stop myself from crying.
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Avatar universal
Well that's ur baby no need to explain  to people anything just be strong it is hard to raise a child on ur own but trust me if u have to do it on ur own do it a baby it not just a baby it's a miracle there is so many people out there  who need a child they can't have So raise ur baby u just need to be strong if u feel in the future u need his help u decided  what to do trus me u gonna need help specially if u working
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My daughter is 5 and I'm raising her on my own. I'm 16 weeks pregnant by a guy who told me he loved me and wanted to be with me the rest of his life but as soon as he found out about the baby he ran. He wants nothing to do with the baby and wants a perternity test before he will even consider child support. That is fine if he wants to pay for all of that. It will all work out. Men just don't know how to step up anymore and take responsibility. They think it's easier to just run.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Just tell them that you are raising the child on your own. Nobody needs to know why, who the dad is, where he is our anything else. I know that's easier said than done, but after you say it a few times, it'll be a little easier. My sister is a single mom & I've seen the stress she's gone thru. Good luck.
Helpful - 0
134578 tn?1693250592
I would go for the child support.  If he doesn't want any other connection, no problem, it sounds like he will be more grudging than useful anyway.  But don't turn down the money.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
If you want to be upfront and straight up tell them, it's your business and you are going to do it on your own. If they can't accept that and respect it then they just need to mind their own business. Its what I would do, honestly.
Helpful - 0

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