Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
644974 tn?1312758070

Off topic... looking for advice on family numbers :)

Hi all havent been on in ages so good to see you are all still here! My youngest is now 18mth old! I also have a 7yr old and a 9yr old all boys!!!
3 boys!
Ok my question for you tonight i know is mainly personal choice but just wanted some opinions on what you all think and the experiences you have had along the way,
Im at cross roads in my life right now as to weather or not to have another baby? i have two boys 7and 9 who are close in age and thats great i then had a medical termination 1 yr later ( long story very sad ) then 6yrs later after much heartache from our loss we welcomed Levi (now 18mths) into our family.

Things are busy and crazy and wonderful and happy but im going to be 30 this yr in december and want to decide if to have anymore children (one more!)  Id love a girl but its not my only motivation id be just as happy with another boy.

id like to hear what others think, what you have done etc...is three an odd number? will little one be left out if we dont have another? am i taking on too much?
i also suffer from PPD and OCD and stress about where they will all sleep etc i have 4 bedrooms and two eldest share then bub in his room then the other room is out play room (toy room) but running out of space! where do all you big familys put all the clothes toys etc? lol sorry i know sounds trivial but it matters to me.

thanks ladies hope your all well xox
6 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
644974 tn?1312758070
Thanks ladies, i agree with all the comments, and Joy i hear you on that when your done you will feel complete i have friends that have kids similar ages to mine and they say NO WAY IM TOTALLY DONE!! and i dont feel that way, i think we will try for number 4 later this yr, and your right we will find the space :) xx
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I say go for it! Give baby #4 the playroom and do a major cleaning of the toys and clothes. We keep clothes in each child's room in a closet & dresser. We also keep a bookshelf in each child's room with age-appropriate books. And finally each child has a toy basket that they keep in their closet or under the bed with their own toys.

You'll fine the space!

Most of the time, at least what I have heard from other women, is that when you're done you have a peace about it. - you just definitely know you're done. You don't seem at peace about NOT having another so I'd consider having another and going from there. ;-)
Helpful - 0
719902 tn?1334165183
In regards to this question, I always ask myself, "Which would I regret?  Having another child, or NOT having another child?"
I know many (older) people, family and friends, who "would have loved to have had another child" but didn't feel they could afford it, were too old, etc etc, and I am determined NOT to have that regret! LoL  
If it were up to me, I'd have a dozen, but at this point I am pretty much hoping for just 1 more (we have 4).  
If you can in any way afford it, I would go for it!!  Finances are my DH's primary concern with having another baby. I am trying to get him to see that putting another little one with  our wonderful home daycare provider will just take the place of our 5 y/o who is going to Kindergarten this fall = no extra cost! But he doesn't see it that way. :?

I agree, too, that it would be nice for your little one to have a playmate closer in age.  All of mine are 3 years apart, so no one is super-close but no one is alone, either.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wow, I am in the same boat as you and amberlia....I too have 3boys, 5-3-1 and have been going back and forth with what I want to do. I just dont know for us if we could handle another little one, kids arent cheap and only cost more as they get older. Right we are fine, but when I think about in a few years; schooling, sports, feeding them (LOL) o-m-g, can boys eat ;)

Some days I am fine with not having another baby, I love my boys and they are prefect and healthy. Then other days I am wishing I could have another one, but for me. I dont know if its the desire to have a girl or the desire to just have a baby? Ahh. but all in all, I believe you should do what makes you and your family happy, and Im sure everything else will full into place :o) Good luck
Helpful - 0
1672583 tn?1303915766
I know exactly what you mean, I am going back and forth with the same thing. I have 3 boys: ages 12, 5, 2 and I will be 30 this year as well.. I would love a little girl or maybe even two girls close together. There are a lot of things I think about as I am sure you do too, Like: Will I be sane? After 3 busy body boys...they keep you running 24 hrs a day! Affordability? I would not have any more if I didn't think I could keep up with the financial demands of my kids wants and needs, sports for 3 kids is already very expensive. and lastly the biggest question for me is what is my end goal? I love family! all in all I would love to have a large family they are going to be your best friends!

I think I may wait until my youngest is in preschool so that will help my sanity and give mommy baby time...so maybe another year before pregnancy for me?!

Good luck to your happy family!
Helpful - 0
287246 tn?1318570063
Well, I am pregnant w/ #7 right now.  My oldest is a boy.  I had him very young.  For the past almost 4 years, he has not lived with us.  The rest of my kiddos are all girls.  The youngest (19 months) sleeps with me.  The 3 oldest all sleep together.  My 3 year old loves to sleep in the living room.  A little untraditional, but it works for us.  I just had my u/s and it's a boy!  I really expected a money wrench in things because I just assumed it would be another girl and that's why I got pregnant again was so my little one would have a buddy just for her.  So, I have no idea where he will sleep when he gets older, but I know I have time for that later.  We want to move to the country.  We want to buy a piece of land and build on it...hopefully within the next couple of years.  This way we have plenty of room for all the kids to play and we can build the house to have as many rooms as we want/need.

As for clothes and toys.....oh man, I could open up a little girls's clothing store.  We have a 4 bedroom house.  Our bedroom is dowonstairs (which I don't like having such small children).  One of the bedrooms upstairs has a queen size bed AND a twin bed.  The rest of the room is all clothes.  That's basically where we store all of those.  Another bedroom has a toddler bed and bunk beds, with the bottom bunk being a double bed and the top being a twin.  Plus we have a twin mattress that slides under the double bed, in case the girls have a friend over or something.  That is their main bedroom, but they have recently started sleeping in the other room with the queen bed.  The 3 like to sleep together and that bed is the biggest for them and super comfy too.  It's our old bed!  The last bedroom upstairs is my son's old room and is now a work out room.  I guess it could technically become the baby boy's room later on but we wouldn't have anywhere else to put all of this stuff and we really want to be out of here by the time he is old enough to need a room.  We do have a game room upstairs though.  That's where we keep all the toys, TV, etc.  Toys aren't suppose to be in bedroom.  This way the mess all stays in one room :)

So, that's how we have it and make it work.  I would have one more but I obviously love my big family.  LOL!  It's really to you though and you still have plenty of time.  I am 35 and pregnant w/ #7.

Good luck and have missed seeing you around here :)
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Pregnancy Community

Top Pregnancy Answerers
13167 tn?1327194124
Austin, TX
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.