Aa
This forum is getting depressing...
Am I the only one who feels this way?? I know we are here to help & uplift eachother but lately all I see are complaints (from myself included). My husband has pointed out that the sad/depressing stories stress me out, as I am always wondering, "what if" or is our baby ok. My heart breaks for the women who have lost their children for no reason, and it leaves me wondering if its going tohappen to me. I love to be able to get loving support from all of you wonderful women but I do believe I am leaving this forum :( any women who I have made friends with who would like to continue talking pls inbox me and we can exchange email addresses. I wish all of you wonderful women all the luck & blessings. Thank you everyone for all your help and advice on all my many posts & rants! love to you all!
I agree with shirano and everyone else that agdeed with her and ^^ good advice, hopefully things change. Im getting extremely bored and depressed with this forum!
Thats good advice ahp84 I never thought of that, but I do love the 25-34 forum theres alot of wonderful mommies on there I wish it would pick up abit more everyone is so nice.
I've been on this site for six years and from experience, I can tell you that this forum in particular (which used to be for ages 18-34, as a lot of you know) goes through these phases. I've noticed particularly since this forum has been split between 18-24 and the 25-34 forums that, mainly because a lot of you are first time mom's going through their first pregnancies and quite a few of you are not even married yet, that this forum gets the most traffic BECAUSE the experience is not there...and many of you find yourselves on common ground, asking the same questions, experiencing a lot of the same upheavals in your lives as they are on the path to changing your whole lives more drastically that you could have ever imagined.
This is not a bad thing nor is it a judgement to any of you--I was once a pregnant 19 year old going through exactly the same questions and shakey life changes as you are. Oh believe me...I was there. The sh!tty boyrfriend, the drama, living at home still, being in college, trying to work a part-time job, eventually going through a nasty break-up with the babydaddy that included a restraining order, etc.
The point I want to make is that many of you are beginning the first steps of a journey in your life that will be the most significant journey you EVER make. It's totally understandable that you'll face problems, questions, drama, suffering, and even losses of things from your financial security to relationships to God forbid even a child. It can happen to anyone at any age, but it's a more expected of younger couples/parents than older. Just take a look at the pregnancy forums for 25-34 and 34+. It's a different world for the most part in those forums, both with their own unique life problems related to pregnancy and relationships and child-bearing.
So don't get discouraged with this forum too much. It will enter a new phase within a few weeks or so. Trust me, I've seen it happen again and again over the years, and certain phases have frustrated me too and I had to remove myself for a few weeks before coming back. But if you love the company here and have made good friends, then it's worth it to come back from time to time to check in. People here do care. :-)
One last thing: over the years here, I've found the best places for posting a personal vent is a journal. There may come a time after you post something that you'll want deleted, and with a journal, you have that control for yourself. You can also delete the comments that are posted to your own journal by people if they are rude or just too weird for your liking, lol. And believe me, journals can get just as much attention as a post, if not more, because it'll show up in the sidebar if it is public (another thing you can control) in more than one forum, therefore giving more people a chance to see it and offer advice or consolation or whatever it is you're seeking. And the other good thing about journals is that you don't have to worry that they'll get transferred to another forum because your topic was "miscategorized" here or elsewhere. For example, I'm noticing a lot of posts in this forum about relationship troubles effecting your pregnancies are getting moved to places such as the Relationships forum--where many of your friends who do know your stories never post, and then you get a whole new set of people chiming in that you've never "met" before.
Journaling--it's a great advantage to utilize here.
This is not a bad thing nor is it a judgement to any of you--I was once a pregnant 19 year old going through exactly the same questions and shakey life changes as you are. Oh believe me...I was there. The sh!tty boyrfriend, the drama, living at home still, being in college, trying to work a part-time job, eventually going through a nasty break-up with the babydaddy that included a restraining order, etc.
The point I want to make is that many of you are beginning the first steps of a journey in your life that will be the most significant journey you EVER make. It's totally understandable that you'll face problems, questions, drama, suffering, and even losses of things from your financial security to relationships to God forbid even a child. It can happen to anyone at any age, but it's a more expected of younger couples/parents than older. Just take a look at the pregnancy forums for 25-34 and 34+. It's a different world for the most part in those forums, both with their own unique life problems related to pregnancy and relationships and child-bearing.
So don't get discouraged with this forum too much. It will enter a new phase within a few weeks or so. Trust me, I've seen it happen again and again over the years, and certain phases have frustrated me too and I had to remove myself for a few weeks before coming back. But if you love the company here and have made good friends, then it's worth it to come back from time to time to check in. People here do care. :-)
One last thing: over the years here, I've found the best places for posting a personal vent is a journal. There may come a time after you post something that you'll want deleted, and with a journal, you have that control for yourself. You can also delete the comments that are posted to your own journal by people if they are rude or just too weird for your liking, lol. And believe me, journals can get just as much attention as a post, if not more, because it'll show up in the sidebar if it is public (another thing you can control) in more than one forum, therefore giving more people a chance to see it and offer advice or consolation or whatever it is you're seeking. And the other good thing about journals is that you don't have to worry that they'll get transferred to another forum because your topic was "miscategorized" here or elsewhere. For example, I'm noticing a lot of posts in this forum about relationship troubles effecting your pregnancies are getting moved to places such as the Relationships forum--where many of your friends who do know your stories never post, and then you get a whole new set of people chiming in that you've never "met" before.
Journaling--it's a great advantage to utilize here.
It's just frustrating for me, this pregnancy is super emotional for me. But shirano is right. Hit the nail on the head. When people (myself included) have genuine non vent questions people don't respond. At all and no one wants to continually bump their question. Maybe if we collectively bump the questions even if we don't have an answer that could help. I have gotten wonderful advice from so many of u and hate to leave but Hubby thinks its best. I spend waaaay to much time here. But if any one wants to exchange emails or Instagram I would be happy to. So many of you I too wanna see pics of your Angels once they arrive.
Yeah shirano hit it on the money, however besides all the rants and vents there have also been some really nice posts about husbands and boyfriends and babyshowers and what not. . Haha just saying. . I have not ever posted a rant or vent since i been on the forum but sometimes these ladies who do have no one else to talk to. . I guess i'd just say that if those particular posts depress or annoy someone, its not that hard to just ignore those and only go for answering the questions. .
Idk maybe it would make alot of people happier if all the vents had there own forum because theres so many of them and this could be back to qyestions about pregnancy and things baby related. It would probably be real popular as well. But I do wish the mood of this forum would change as well.
I agree, i used to be on here more than facebook and I've noticed myself backing off quite a but and getting aggitated with peoples posts lol and my husband tells me that i worry too much bc i come on here and see all the problems that might happen to me. But i love being able to offer any advice i can, just like you ladies did for me in early pregnancy, if it werent for y'all then i would have been in the dr once a week freaking out lol
Dont leave I like your post!!! I am gona cut back as well my hubby said I pay to much attention to this app;( I do need to get caught up in my housework. Just skip the ones that make u sad thatz what I do alot because im natural a emotional person. Whatever u choose is up to you but ill miss you:(
best of luck with your pregnancy, I agree that there are depressing posts, but at the same time I feel those are the ones who need help, as for the questions getting overlooked, I am a second time mother who has been through a ton, I cant relate to any posts about pregnancy past 33 weeks cause that is when I had my first child, but I do try to answer every question I have an answer to cause I am on here day and night lol. to you mommies leaving the forum I want you to know that since September when I joined this forum you ladies have really helped me answer a lot of my problems or concerns with my pregnancy and please come back when baby is born so I can see pics and know how big and beautiful your precious babies are!!!!!!! again best of luck and I hope that you still visit us occasionally with any questions or updates on your pregnancy :):) you will be missed
Yea same here... I've requested to cancel my account...but it was nice talking to all of you . Hope you all have a Happy and Healthy pregnancy..
Not just that its depressing,its gotten like facebook where people literally post every single thing that pops in their minds an like ^^ said real questions get overlooked..i guess thats just how the app is now,i barely come on.anyways...hope the rest of your ride to new baby town is super smooth hun!!!
Only thing that has been slightly frustrating to me about the forum is that some genuine questions have been going unanswered lately. I try to answer as many as I can but I only know so much lol. Then there are vents that get a crazy amount of responses. Although its sometimes easier to respond to vents then questions. I get that. I just hope more questions start getting answers.
Not really ,everyone has there ups and downs, but i wouldnt let a forum depress me,it actually has helped me because i get to learn different things from other girls pregnancy's good or bad,& right now i dont have too many ppl i can talk to in my life about my pregnancy so if its either good or bad,happy or sad,boring or funny i can talk about it on here,& am thankful to the other girls that have put in their input,and am more than glad to help anyone one out with what i can. so i dont agree too much,but i hope you feel better & dont let post on here depress you,just stay positive!
In my mind its fixed thatvevery women n every pregnancy is different.. Everyones circumstances are different... This is Health help forums.. W can not ecpect it to be always laughing n bubbling.. If thts wht we would want thn it ll become chatroom.. I know mostly things asked here are from mother whoes either in serious problem or going thru one.. Unfortunately only help we can give thm is emotional love and support.. My midwife always said never compare ur pregnancy with others...
I understand ur concerns n worries.. I wish u very best in life and for ur pregnancy..we are always available to help and support.. Take cares...
I understand ur concerns n worries.. I wish u very best in life and for ur pregnancy..we are always available to help and support.. Take cares...
Ive been feeling that way. 2-4 days ago all the depressing posts that were going up made me feel depressed. And I know I had posted a rather depressing post too. But yeah, Im not on the forum as much because of it.
I do agree that a lot of the posts are sad but theses are hards time for some mothers ans very real everything that is happening to some women can happen to any of us a forum is a place where everyone has a voice..there are also a lot of first time moms on this forum and they are going to ask a lot of bad or good questions...some women really look for advice on here and comfort and we have helped other women in time of need and helped them through their problems I think that is very uplifting...just bc its get hard does that mean that we have to kinda in a way bail out ??
Completely agree! It's sad itself that everyone feels so depressed on this forum.
I agree. It really has been and I've haven't been posting as much as I usually do 'cuz like baby has said. I'm a ftm and can't really offer much advice when It comes to those things, I haven't experienced It myself or been around someone who did. All I can do Is pray. It's sad to see you go, but I do wish the best for you and your family!
I agree,70% of the post now are super depressing an i cant relate to the majority to offer advice,so i just pop in every now an then but not nearly as much as before lol..best of luck on the rest of your pregnancy girly!!
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