Is she really pregnant?

[TooConfused60]

Sorry, this ended up A LOT longer than I thought it was going to be, but please help if you can.
So, here is my complicated situation.  I have been seeing this girl for about 2 months, but we first had sex on 1/2/2010. This was the first day after her period. It was unprotected, but I've always been told that I can't have a baby the normal way, due to the fact that I went through chemotherapy when I was 18. I'm currently 27 and we have had unprotected sex multiple times since the first time. I haven't "pulled out", due to the fact that I was told I would not be fertil after the chemo.  She is not on birth control.  She told me after about 2-3 weeks after the first few times we had sex that she felt ill and that her breast were very sensative.  She didn't allways feel sick, just some days.  The breast pain went away, but she did have flue like symptoms, which i read that some women have and don't realize they are pregnant.  Never the less, we continued to have unprotected sex, and she said she had her period, ( the first one, since we started having sex) but I did read that some women think they are having their period when they are actually pregnant, but it really isn't their period, it's just bleeding.  I know this is not normal for all women, but I've been reading A LOT on the internet, and I need some more information. Here is where I need the help.  We ended up getting in an argument at a bar, and I OVER REACTED and walked out of the bar on her.  Needless to say she was pissed.  I was a complete *** for doing what I did, and she was not happy with me.  She told my friends, that showed up at the bar later, that she was done with me.  When they told me this the next day I got her stuff from my house, because I was so hurt, and took it to her/her mom's house.  I had a pregnancy test that  I had bought from when she first told me she thought she was pregnant, but did not want to ask her to take it until she, or if she, missed her period & put that in the bag as well.  She was obviously not happy about that either.  She ended up texting me later that night saying that she was pissed at what I did.  I appoligized and said that I knew that it didn't change things, but I was sorry.  I really hurt her, and it wasn't intentional, but I did.  Anyway, the next day I felt like a HUGE ***, and went to her house to appoigize.  To my amazement she actually let me appoligize in person.  I felt like an appology over the phone or text is nothing, and I felt like saying I was sorry in-person would prove that I really was sorry. Later that night she texted me saying hi.  I said hi back and asked her what she was up to.  She said she was working, and I asked her if I could call her.  She said she wasn't in a real good mood, which I expected since I was rude to her. I said sorry, and she said thanks.  I said that I would like to talk on the phone and she said to give her a few min, she has a terrible stomach ache due to the positive test result she got back.  ( The home pregnancy test I put in the bag of her stuff I left at her house.)  I asked her if she was serious, and she said that yes the test came back positive. She said that she is going to take it again in the next few days.  Do you think she is actually pregnant?  I love this girl with all my heart and she has never lied to me, so I don't think that she would lie.  It's not like I told her I don't want anything to do with her, so it isn't like she would be lying to try to keep me around, because I do want to be around her.  I love her. any imput would be appreceated.

[smjmekg]

I just looked up chemo's affect on fertility in males, and although it could cause infertility there are many sites that suggest your body will recover after the chemo. It all depends on the type of cancer and what medication they gave you to treat it. The sites say that some people continue to have low sperm counts, and some people will have no sperm at all after chemo, but like I said some will recover. You should definitely go get checked out and see if you can get a sperm count to see if you are still fertile, or if you are doubting this girl's loyalty you can always get a DNA test, but don't rule out the fact that you are the father or that she is pregnant unless you get yourself tested and are proved to be completely infertile.

[MARIS78]

get your sperm tested,, and then youll know if you are fertile or not.. then you can make an informed desicion to see if you move on in your relationship or not.

[tina25]

From the Story you are telling us I don't think that she is lying! I would be there for her and support her as much as you can!
Go to all Dr.Appt. with her if she let's you and if this isn't the case (I would be suprised if it wasn't) if I was you I would start using some kind of protection. Not only for pregnancy reasons but there are 10000000 stds out there.......
Good Luck and Congrats Dady!

[worrieddd612]

well i guess thats your call. but if i were you i would just tell her that you are the father and you want to be involved and that means all the doctor's appointments. if she still says no then there probably isn't a lot you can do about it unless you chose to tell her your not 100% convinced she's telling you the truth. but its your call from that point. if she doesn't want you to come in to the room with her maybe she will let you sit in the waiting room. and (depending on the doctor) she might be given some things such as baby development magazines and some other things. i know my doctor gave me a big welcome kit with my first appointment..and that would clue you in that she was telling the truth. but im sure there are plenty of doctors that don't give these, so her walking out without one would not mean that she isn't pregnant.  nevertheless, if she isn't lying, eventually there will be ultrasound pictures and things like that. so you'll know before too long.

[TooConfused60]

Thank you for your response.  I know what you mean, I don't really think that she is lying.  It actually would make me so happy, because I want to have a family soooo bad, & I really do love her.  I definnetly don't want to make her have any idea that I'm questioning it, but what do I do if I say that I want to go to the doctor with her and she says no?

[worrieddd612]

well i mean from the story you told i see no reason that she would lie...she was obviously mad at you for how you treated her..so like you said she probably had no reason to lie to try to keep you around. and the fact that you apologized and pursued her again makes me think even more that she wouldn't see a need to lie to keep you around.
so with that said i would assume she's telling the truth. as far as your chemo goes, i think it depends on what type of cancer you had, and how much chemo you received. but maybe they meant you could be infertile? or that there was a small chance you could still conceive a child? whatever the case it sounds to me like you have. if you're still questioning her i would request to go to the doctor with her. she needs to go now anyways. she will need a blood test to confirm. so go with her to that, and ask to be in the room when the doctor speaks to her. i wouldn't let on that you're questioning her, because if i were here that would greatly p*** me off. good luck.