Best friend or more?

[rena6878]

So one of my best friend is a guy. (I will call him J here to make it easier to tell the problem). I met him during freshmen year in high school. Him and I got real close sophomore year; we would talk for hours on the phone, test ALOT, and always were together, everyone was always say things to us like "oh you two are so cute together" and "oh are you to dating yet??" and we kinda dated... well not really dated, as it was never official. (he was my first. I AM A VIRGIN STILL... i dnt mean first in that sence) We would always hold hands and flirt with eachother and hug. During our finals we were in the same group so he would come over to my house often. but we made sure no one knew anything about all this that happened. We almost kissed one night but I nodded no and turned away, and he just kissed me on my cheek and forehead. We would say "I love you," to eachother too. But during summer he went away, over seas, and when he came back he would talk to me as much, he was cold and distant. so i asked him whats up? why dont u tlk to me anymore. and he said i want to be just friends now. and i was like... ummmm....ok? then things got akward between us.... for a long time. NOw we are good friends and talk alot again (not as much as before). but i am afraid he is going to ask me out...by the way he acts and all... help anybody?

[Meral]

what you should better understand in my opinion is if u feel u can love him or not,i think u can never find a guy who knows u more than he does.you feel anxious cos u know he`s going to ask you out...you should think if u want him or not..if u really wan t him to be your friend make him things clear and stop torturing him from flirts...cos that`s the reason he thinks that you like him too or sth more  that goes beyond likeness....be more clear with yourself first and then take a decision....that`s my advice good luck

[Judy246]

I think honest is the best policy and communicating with him straight and forward on your desire for only friendship will make a difference him sending mix signals.

[rena6878]

yes!! I want to be just friends... and he won't ask. He the type of guy who to scared to make a first move.... even though he did with me..

[luvzherman]

u just need to make sure he knows that nothing is going to happen between u 2 let him down nicely if he asks, u still wana b frendz right.

[rena6878]

Thanks! :)
but I hve stoped with the flirting... He jus started again... I have truely moved on... But I dnt noe about him...

[Judy246]

If you are frie nds and you cross the line between friendship and interest, it can ruin your friendship and you will both feel awkward with each other. There is a lot of mix signals here, which cause even more confusion. He also said he just want to be friends.

If you value him in your heart as just a friend then the flirting has got to stop, but if you feel that you can have an relationship with him and he feels the same way, then go for it, but remember that once you cross that fine line, you can't go back to the way it was as friends. Also, stay in school and you both have your life ahead of you and life is a great big journey and within time you will both meet other people to. Enjoy life and just have fun...Judy

[rena6878]

We both are 16 and Junior in highschool.