Best way to divorce someone when they don't want a divorce

[jaysgirl0703]

I've got the divorce papers filled out, I just need him to agree to sign them, because I would like to file them as jointly because I heard it goes more smoothly than filing single. What would be the best most calm way to approach him to sign the papers as joint. I was thinking about having my parents and his sit down with us to have him sign them. To keep a calm environment. Since I'm afraid he'll lash out and refuse to sign the papers or tear them up.

[RockRose]

Jaysgirl,  what were you thinking when you took the vows?

Used to be,  you had to have "grounds" for divorce.  That is,  there had to be something so wrong with your partner that you could claim the vows were broken.

Abuse,  alcoholism,  infidelity,  abandonment,  etc.

I really think we should go back to that,  or if there aren't grounds for divorce - one partner just found someone that at the moment they think is better - then that partner should have to walk away with nothing.  No property,  no rights to the children,  etc.  

[jaysgirl0703]

Have any of you watched the end of the Bachelor lately? Well that is how I feel, that I should follow my heart and I feel the same way jason explained on the Bachelor because I have met an incredible guy even though my husband is a great guy hes not for me. My husband found the divorce papers I had hidden and completed the other day and burnt them. So I'm back to square one again.

[gokuangel]

I had to get a one signature required divorce to get it to happen! he didnt want it and even ran from the PI for 4 months!! So if you know he doesnt want it then you may have to that route!

[heatherlynn22]

well.....if he doesn't want to sign them he won't. you might have a rocky divorce. having other people their might and might not stop him from lashing out. i know if my dh gave me divorce papers i wouldn't give a flying rats a$$ who was there....i'd be throwing a fit. i wouldn't tear up his papers....i'd just throw them back in his face, after i slapped him.

[iam1butterfly]

Having others present is an excellent idea... after all, the whole idea is to circumvent any foreseeable outbursts. If both sets of parents are agreeable to this approach and, their presence can, indeed, offer an atmosphere of civility... then go for it! However, I would think that you would do best to involve only those who are reasonably neutral, and aren't emotionally invested in all of this. If you could perceive this to be a potentially difficult situation for either set of parents, you may want to rethink the thought of involving them. Good luck!