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Avatar universal

Different goals.

I have this amazing boyfriend, fantastic. We both enjoy a good sex life, and we are bestfriends at that. It doesn't seem it could get any better. But we have different goals in life. I want to become a Musical psychologist. His plans are to move to another place but not have enough money to actually stay there just get there and have a kid. The sooner the better. He plans to live in his car until he can find a job and he hopes for a child before this. He says that we may end up breaking up though I am willing to find a different carreer. I have been conceplating this for a while. You can always get the job of your dreams. You cant always find the love of your life. He has these two things mixed up. I don't know what to do. I need help. Advice?
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4456827 tn?1363378247
One thing I look for in a partner is someone that can be the head of household and can make sound decision for my family. This guy sounds like he isnt capable of that.
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Avatar universal
DITTO the above posters.  
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13167 tn?1327194124
I agree with SpecialMom,  and have to add you can NOT always get the job of your dreams,  and I don't believe in "the love of your life".  

I think there are innumerable men out there who are wonderful,  and would make fantastic husbands and fathers of your children,  and you would have a great life together.  I don't believe there is one pre-destined man who you are meant to be with.

And even if I did,  this guy isn't it.  Frankly,  he sounds a bit unbalanced.
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Avatar universal
thank you so much!
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973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi there.  Well, I'm not sure about the future of living in a car with your boyfriend.  And with a baby to boot.  Why would you think that plan is credible at all?  

Personally, I am very business like when it comes to things like long term relationships.  Romance is great and a given but it is the fine details of a couple that make or break them.  Having the same goals and similar desires for lifestyle is really critical among other things.  

No, I wouldn't give up your career for this boyfriend.  and if he is threatening to break up with you unless you do, he's not being very boyfriend like.  

Someone who wants a normal life that includes being able to support themselves (BEFORE HAVING KIDS) is probably worthy of having on your list of must haves.  

In my opinion, men can come and go and your education gets you through.  It actually helps you get in a better place to make a wise decision regarding your love life because you don't 'have' to settle.  

So, I would stay on track with your career.  The boyfriend stuff will sort itself out and no, don't have a kid for a while.  good luck
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