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Erection Problem

I have been with my boyfriend a year and we have never been able to have intercourse because he can't keep an erection.  He is now 52.  He has tried generic Viagra and over the counter things for testosterone also but nothing has worked.  I have recently found out that he has been getting off to pornos this whole time by himself with no problems!  Why can't he make love with me?  What should I do?
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3149845 tn?1506627771
Hi, i think your words "why cant he make love to me" kinda implies hes tired. At 52 men do loose much of the fire and its much easier to masturbate by himself. What to do? Try making love to him and see if that helps.
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Avatar universal
Guess I worded that wrong lol  I have tried to give him oral sex and  do the hand work for him and that didn't work either, so me being on top wouldn't make a difference.
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and it was with not 2 lol
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Sounds like he has been heavy into porn and now he is having problems dealing an ACTUAL person to please and connect with.  

Problem is psychological.  Would he be open to see a sex therapist?

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Avatar universal
Said he won't go to a regular Dr or see a shrink, thought he was hiding something like this and he lied and said he wasn't.  I just found all the pornos and he had no choice but confess.  I have tried several things with him over the year but I am not a 20 yr old porn star, he has killed my self esteem!  I can't compete with this.
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Avatar universal
Hon, I hate to say it................it is you vs. the porn and the porn is winning.

That fact that he won't see a regular doctor or a shrink says VOLUMES.  It is saying he isn't interested in:

A. Pleasing you sexually because he just can't be bothered.
B. Hearing you complain about this.
C. Changing.

You've only invested a year in this and now you need to ask yourself is it worth continuing with a porn addict who doesn't see a problem and who could care less about your needs?
                                                                                    
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Avatar universal
The deal breaker here should be he has killed your self-esteem.
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Avatar universal
Thank You!
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Avatar universal
Hi there!

Not sure if you needed any more input, but I had the same problem with my ex, and we're only 28. It's definitely a side effect of the addiction, and if he's not willing to talk to someone about it, it's never going to get better.

Remember, you are amazing and deserve to be treated accordingly!

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