Hot for a teacher?

[kcalla]

It wouldn't be so hard if we weren't so compatible... what am I supposed to do?

[kcalla]

thank you, treazzure.

and, no, he doesn't know; no one knows! it's a secret. i talk to him sometimes but i'm always appropriate, so i don't think he has any idea. he only likes me as a student.

[treazzure007]

are you approaching graduation this year and will you be at least 18 years of age?  if so, just enjoy your own little secret crush for the next few months and after graduation, leave him a note or tell him outright that you're interested in becoming more acquainted with him.  
if you're not close to graduation and 18 years of age, sorry for you.  you'll just be forced to crush for years or deal with those dreadful, immature sillies known as boys :)

[RockRose]

You're absolutely allowed to have a crush.  Lots of girls have secret crushes on their male teachers.

Keep it a secret,  and leave him alone.

[mami1323]

Of course they aren't mature, they are in highschool.  People don't mature until much later in life when they go through life experiences.  A crush is a crime when the person is older and can be arrested for statutory rape.  Or when it is a person who is supposed to be in a position of authority and takes advantage of a innocent girl.  He could lose his job so I don't think that's funny at all.

[kcalla]

i'm not trying to use that as an excuse... i'm simply saying that i love the fact that he's mature when none of the guys at my school are.

and since when am i not allowed to have a crush? it isn't a crime. my mom knows and just thinks it's funny.

[mami1323]

You can talk to him as a mentor and as someone like a father figure, but once you start thinking of him in a romantic way, it's time to put on the brakes.  You know it's wrong or else you wouldn't be posting on here.  I didn't have my father in my life either but I didn't go after a teacher.  You can't use that as an excuse, you know what's right and what's not.  You said it yourself, it makes school exciting, that's why you continue with it.  I don't think you want any advice, I think you want someone to say, yep, it's ok.  No one here is going to do that.

[kcalla]

i don't talk about it with ANYONE... it's like my little secret; it makes school fun!

and all we do is talk. it's nice to talk to a mature guy once in a while (i don't really have a father figure).

if that's so wrong, i don't know what's right.

[PrettyKitty1]

Here is my 2 cents. Forget about that. It will not work out.  He will get in trouble and you will feel like it’s the end of the world. I not only had one crush on a teacher but many. You fantasize, you think about what it would be like, but then you have to wake up and move on. You’re still young, so finding other guys with a lot more things in common will not be hard to find.

[ThePhilosophizer]

Blech... filled with grammatical errors. Sorry if it doesn't make sense. My greatest writing comes from editing my papers. I will not commit the same mistake again in future posts.

[ThePhilosophizer]

I went to a college where many people attained education degrees. I'll just repeat what my buddy told a girl who said something to him only pertaining to what a certain enduendo meant among high school women at the school that employed him as a student teacher: " Are you kidding?! You know I have to report you just for that to me, right?!"

Now it may just be the concept of a relationship, but his position implies that he cannot do anything less then get you in trouble about it, or else he risks his entire life. That's protocal, and I don't think he'll risk his 5 years of college for a women he just met.

Also understand that this guy has four or five years on you, and you may see many things in common, but also understand that might change quickly - and there is a lot that you may have no idea about. And judging from what you've said, he is porbably about 22 or 23. I'm his age, and I'll just state that perhaps the similarities of cookiness  that I probably share with many high schoolers of this era speaks little to my complexity as a person. Not to sound harsh, but a lot of things in common with you may be a few things in common with him... and yes... only because of those four years of college. One useful thing to learn is that you can have very deep and complex relationships with people and never having any more expection then friendship (unlike what is often implied from the TV and pop culture. I know... a relationship between a straight man and women that has lasted for years, is close enough to the point where one would give their life for the other, and no expection of anything more?! It sounds proposterious and rebellious... but is ultimately true. *Makes a face of frankness, then rolls eyes at the stupitidy of society.*) This bit of wisdom is very useful, and few ever learn of its truth. I... only learned it a year ago, and lost a very good friend because of it. A person that I spent so much time with, wrote letters to, and even worse, was a connection so deep that it could have led somewhere... if she wasn't haunted by a past of terrible men in her life.

We had more then just a lot in common. We could generally predict our interacting behavior and even shared the same troubles and psychological issues.... fear of possibilities. It was a relationship that no similarities that men in my life could ever dream to behold. This was learned over 160 emails between each other, and constant talks filled with laughs and joy that I had never previously experienced.

Now... can you say the same about this teacher? Because if you cannot, then you don't know him, and you should understand that.

Regardless, you shouldn't because of his job, because not reporting you would be the end of his career. This is in contrast to you recieving some discinplinary report or something of that measure for him reporting you. In the end, Reporting you from his position is what is best for everyone, because everyone keeps their jobs and doesn't have their life ruined.

So the answer is clear: It doesn't matter if you're attracted and have in your perception a lot in common. It still isn't enough even after you graduate to ask him out, and certainly not a good idea to mention to him unless you expect him to turn you in.

Peace.

[BabyHardiman]

How the heck would you know if you have "a lot in common" with one of your teachers?

I would certainly hope that a teacher would not pursue a school girl crush and risk his entire career.  

I think you should keep your distance, and do not talk about your crush with ANYONE.. just talking about it could get him in to trouble, or investigated.  There is entirely too many inappropriate things going on in schools today.  You are NOT there to crush on your teacher!  You are in school to LEARN.  

[drmwvrjean]

kcalla,
does this teacher have the same attraction for you that you do for them?!?  

[kcalla]

we do have a lot in common... it's almost weird.

[kcalla]

yes, my plan IS to wait until i graduate! calm down, everyone. i'm thinking about coffee...

[momagain59]

How do you know this teacher is interested in a relationship outside of a teacher/student? What do you have in common with this teacher? Has he just recently started teaching? If he were to have a relationship with you, his teaching career would probably be over. Have you thought about waiting until you graduate and then it will not be that big of a deal?

[imanaddict]

I honestly don't want to see another student/teacher triangle on the news!!

[mami1323]

Are the feelings mutual or is it just on your end?  Even still, it's completely inappropriate and can really ruin his life.  If he's pursuing you, that is wrong as well and honestly he should be reported.  

[heatherlynn22]

it's the same in pa. if a teacher has an inappropriate relationship with a student their teaching credentials are yanked and they're tossed in jail. it would ruin his life. wait till you graduate then pursue it. or just forget about it and stick to a guy your age. do you really want to risk him loosing something he's worked a long long time to get? depending what degree he got it took him at least 4 years to get it. and have him thrown into jail?

[babypooh]

I agree with the above posts. Know your boundaries and don't cross those lines. Concentrate on other things like being with friends and having some good healthy fun :)

[Fuzzz]

It's normal to be hot for a teacher.  It makes a class much more fun.  Enjoy the attraction, but know that he could get in a lot of trouble if he were to give in to temptation.  It's his job to control himself with students.

[RockRose]

oops,  meant to say "In Texas" in above post.

[RockRose]

And actually,  I don't know if this is true in all states,  but for a teacher to have an "inappropriate relationship" with a student in public school is a felony.  And they will go to prison for a LONG time,  oddly enough even if the student is 18,  an adult.

Don't ruin this guy's life.

[teko]

Um, think no more about it, is not acceptable. Even tho it is totally normal to have a crush on a cute teacher, it is not good for their career and you will find that the situation is temporary.

[kcalla]

erm... high school. but there isn't much of an age difference.