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973741 tn?1342342773

What is your definition of cheating?

People have different expectations.  I have a clear idea of what I think is cheating and a minor grey area that falls into that category as well.  Other people are more extreme or more loose with it. What's your definition of cheating when in a relationship.  
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In my opinion, anything He would not do or anything He would not say in the presence of His Partner is unfaithful to the relationship.  
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so good to see you!!!!  Glad you stopped back!  So, if he is mad and he says to a friend that I'm a nag/hag . . . he's being unfaithful?  I'm sure this has happened.  And sadly, I cheat on him all the time.  My good friend and I vent.  then I'm over it and go back to not picking at his flaws.  And I wouldn't want him to know that on SOME days when *I* am in a bad mood . . .   every little thing he does seems like a flaw.  LOL  (what can I say, I can get a little crabby).  
Hi Special Mom !!  It's good to 'see' You, too !! These are good points You make here and I agree with You !!  !!  I wouldn't call Your examples here cheating or being unfaithful.  I was thinking more that one shouldn't do or say anything with the opposite sex that He wouldn't be prepared to do or say in the presence of His Partner.
I agree.
Venting to another about your spouse isn't cheating in my book.  Now, if you are venting to someone who your spouse knows nothing about (a male co-worker, someone you're meeting in secret to complain about your hubby) then that's wrong.  That's how emotional affairs pretty much get started.
973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
When I first posted this question, I thought my opinion was firm and clear.  I'm finding when I think about it more, that there is more grey area than I originally thought and it's more complex than my surface response.

What is NOT cheating to me:
porn, going to a strip club, talking to a girl, talking to an old friend that is female.

What IS cheating w grey areas included:
true sexual affair, true emotional affair, online stuff that someone would have to hide from their partner, someone that became more important than the person's spouse/partner/family.  
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2 Comments
I do agree with what you've stated to a certain point, but if a man feels he has to hide the fact that he:

looks at porn
goes to strip clubs
talks to old female friends

then there's an issue.  Hiding these things makes a man look suspicious.  Who can trust a man who hides what he is doing?  If a man is honest with a woman from the beginning and tells her he does these things then I can respect that man for being honest, but I can't respect a man who represents himself one way and does something else behind his partner's or wife's back.  A man hanging out in bars, strip clubs and looking at porn on a frequent isn't my ideal of any man I would want in my life, but that's me.  The same with guys sitting online all day chatting with loads of women.
I wouldn't want a man that did those things either, total turn off for me.
20691887 tn?1504691993
Hiding a relationship or relationships deliberately from your spouse or partner even if there is no sex involved.
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2 Comments
Agree that sex doesn't need to be involved, that hiding is a big red flag.
Hiding is a big red flag, and leads to worse things for sure.
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