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Avatar universal

Advice needed after stupid mistake

Hi all, thanks for such an excellent website,
I am a happily married straight male but 3 weeks ago whilst drunk on a stag do I made the biggest mistake of my life and had protected anal and vaginal sex with a csw from Romania ( working in Spain ) everything was done with a condom and it appeared in tact when all was finished.
This is the most stupid decision of my life and I am now terrified that I may be infected with something. I have no symptoms and have been for a full sti screening after 2 weeks since exposure I'm just waiting for the results.
The woman at the clinic made me feel awful and said I am at high risk of many stds including HIV as it was anal with a csw even though it was all protected, I feel there is a lot of scare mongering that takes place in uk clinics but still can't help but worry.
My question is what are my actual chances of being infected with anything, I understand I am at risk of hpv and herpes etc but what about any other infections, needless to say I haven't had sex with my wife since and will not until I get my results back , many thanks in advance for any help someone may be able to offer.
Yours sincerely
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Avatar universal
ThNks so much for your replys folks, I know that a lot of symptoms can come from anxiety and guilt etc and I'm sure I'm noticing things that I wouldn't normally for exactly these reasons. I will see the doc for what I think may be thrush and take it from there, thanks again just getting other peoples view points helps with the anxiety , now just need to work on the guilt.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
That time frame was fine for gonorrhea and chlamydia. But you didn't even have a risk for those. See a Dr and explain symptoms, don't see this as a STD related issue.
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Avatar universal
Also may be worth speaking to a doctor here, just to ease your mind.

What is low risk / high risk depends who you ask.

Some people (even here) will say all unprotected sex is high risk. Some experts say unprotected vaginal is low risk (with regards to HIV) ie. on average  1 exposure per 2000 and that's with someone that has it. (other factors can change this a bit)

It's all about risk perception. One person would see a 1% risk as no big deal, another may see a 0.05% risk as a huge area for concern.

With clinics, i'd imagine they don't really know who is really up to the most risky behaviour so treat people the same in some places, as people do tend to lie about risks for various reasons.

Your exposure is no concern because it was completely protected, so i'm surprised you had this reaction. If everyone that had protected sex went to the clinics each time they wouldn't be able to cope with the volume!

All the best, any more help just message m and i'm happy to talk.
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Avatar universal
My opinion..

If it was protected you are completely fine, that's the whole point of protection.

You need to separate your guilt from this and deal with that another way. Of course it's not easy, with all sorts of thoughts going on at once.

Constant stress and anxiety can be even worse, especially as you would be told you had a 'no risk exposure'

A while ago, I was anxious and kept thinking I could feel shooting pains / burning in my penis. Then i kept going to the toilet every ten minutes. It was anxiety, I was focusing on every little feeling there and imagining it.

It may be worth testing again after 12 weeks purely to give you complete reassurance not because there is anything wrong. The mind is a powerful thing.
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Avatar universal
Hi guys, just wanted to share my concerns and see if anyone can offer me any reassurance, further to my recent posts I am pleased to say that all results from my recent episode came back negative I.e
Gonnorhea , chlamydia HIV and syphillis all negative, I was tested two weeks after possible exposure, however in the last couple of weeks I have had an itching feeling under the foreskin and excessive smegma, I have also had cloudy urine a couple of times, I have been using canisten cream and took a thrush pill which stopped these symptoms for a while but now they are back .
My question is do you think 2 weeks was to soon for testing and do you think I should retest , many thanks in advance
Helpful - 0
6709254 tn?1389303349
Why not just get the full screening. It won't hurt to find out. Besides people are supposed to get tested every six months I think. Just because your married and trust your spouse doesn't mean anything. Certain diseases aren't just sexually transmitted.
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3149845 tn?1506627771
COMMUNITY LEADER
Testing for hiv is not necessary as you did not have any exposure to contract it.
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Avatar universal
Hi , thanks very much for your rapid reply I have had a full sti screen  but couldn't understand why the woman at the clinic felt it necessary to test for HIV especially after 2 weeks as I thought this was too early after exposure to detect . She really was pushing the high risk thing  and has scared the crap out of me to be honest. I just want the results back so I can move on with my life . 1 last question should I test for hiv at 12 weeks as the health worker suggested? Many thanks again
Helpful - 0
3149845 tn?1506627771
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi, well using the condom would only put you at risk for what you mentioned as well as syphilis. The only testing you would need would be for herpes and syphilis and this would be for your wifes protection. There is no test for hpv.
Helpful - 0
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