The chance that you got herpes from her, assuming she has type 2 and she doesn't take daily meds like Valtrex, are about 1 in 1000, or better. You can get genital hsv1 from receiving oral sex, and it remains type 1. The number indicates the strain of the virus, not the location of the infection.
I'm not sure if you attempted anal with her to try to avoid herpes, but if someone has genital herpes, they have it in their entire genital area, including their anal area.
In any case, you didn't really penetrate her but twice, so chances that you got herpes from her are very, very slim.
When you try anal, are you stretching your partner first with your fingers and lube? That will make it easier for you and your partner, cause less pain, and prevent the feelings you had the following day, which was perhaps from you trying to enter her.