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massage parlor mistake need help

I went to a massage parlor also, bachelor party mess up beyond belief.  I feel awful and if I tell my soon to be we are done.  Something I don't want to do again.  She performed a hand job with lotion and lube.  Watched her what I felt was the whole time but now my paranoia has kicked in.  She went to spit and I said no and wiped away before it touched me.  Not 100% there wasn't anything besides that as when we were done 2 mins later she almost upset and asked why not spit.  Nervous I just said lotion only and left.  I have tested for urine chlamydia and gonorrhea which came back negative.  I currently am waiting for early detection hiv test but need advice, this is killing me holding off being with my fiance in fear of what I may give her.
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3149845 tn?1506627771
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi, you have nothing to worry about and no std transfers from a hand job and saliva actully kills germs.
Helpful - 0
7 Comments
Thank you for leaving a response, not sure if my imagination is going full swing but I really don't think there was oral.  I did after we were done and having that brief convo look at her lips.  She was black girl and her lips looked 2 different shades.  Not sure again if that was open sores or bleeding/cuts.  I feel so stupid for doing this and now have unbelievable anxiety!
I read things like this every day and its crazy how anxiety can rule the imgination.
If you need extra reassurance, I totally agree. Hand jobs never transmit STDs, and I have no idea what her lips have to do with anything, as they didn't touch you, but you're fine.

Here are some posts from our experts (when we had them) that may help -

https://www.medhelp.org/posts/STDs/Nervous-about-mutual-masturbation/show/2183476

https://www.medhelp.org/posts/STDs/Mutual-Masturbation-STD/show/1968429

https://www.medhelp.org/posts/STDs/mutual-masturbation-sti/show/1858544

https://www.medhelp.org/posts/STDs/Understanding-the-risks-of-mutual-fingering/show/1516796

https://www.medhelp.org/posts/HIV---Prevention/Vaginal-fluid-on-hand-touched-inside-of-condom-and-head-of-penis/show/1119533 - read this thread thoroughly. There is an excellent explanation about why certain activities are not risks, and why others are.
I do apologize, my imagination and trying to account for every second of my mishap is starting to haunt me.  just remember her leaned over with mouth looking like it was or did have oral but was hard to tell with all the lotion and oil.  The saliva and me saying no and wiped away before touching is all i can definitively say happened.  My mind is having alot of what if moments and truly having anxiety attack waiting for these results.  Again I apologize as I have no one else to speak to about this.
That's your imagination. As a woman, I can tell you that we aren't going to put our mouths on a penis that has a bunch of lotion or oils on it.

Guilt doesn't equal risk.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/dec/29/stop-catastrophising-expert-guide-psychologist

Thank you all for the help, Just say no to activities like this.  Wanted to give update and hope this helps if someone else makes a stupid mistake. Early detection test came back negative, I follow up with the rest of blood type tests in 2 weeks but talking to counselors and what not its due to come back negative also.
Thanks for the updates, but you don't need any follow up testing. You had no risk, and didn't need to test in the first place.

You can absolutely expect any test you take to be negative, as the counselors have said.
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