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Massage parlor - risk of STD
Hi doctors,
I went to a massage parlor yesterday (and already regret it, big mistake).
The girl massaged me with her body, and then played with her vagina, after which she shortly stroked my penis. I do not remember if it was the same hand she used or not, so I assume there is a possibility for vaginal excretion to have come into contact with my penis.
Afterwards I massaged her body with my hands, and rubbed her clitoris. I did not finger her (no penetration). I remember I very briefly touched the shaft of my penis after rubbing her clitoris.
There was no penetrative sex involved (oral, vaginal or anal).
Am I at risk of having contracted an STD? I am very stressed out at the moment.
What is the chance of having contracted syfilis? Not to worried about HPV, but I am worried about chlamydia or gonnorhoe.
If anyone can provide some help or advice, this would be greatly appreciated.
With regards,
John
I went to a massage parlor yesterday (and already regret it, big mistake).
The girl massaged me with her body, and then played with her vagina, after which she shortly stroked my penis. I do not remember if it was the same hand she used or not, so I assume there is a possibility for vaginal excretion to have come into contact with my penis.
Afterwards I massaged her body with my hands, and rubbed her clitoris. I did not finger her (no penetration). I remember I very briefly touched the shaft of my penis after rubbing her clitoris.
There was no penetrative sex involved (oral, vaginal or anal).
Am I at risk of having contracted an STD? I am very stressed out at the moment.
What is the chance of having contracted syfilis? Not to worried about HPV, but I am worried about chlamydia or gonnorhoe.
If anyone can provide some help or advice, this would be greatly appreciated.
With regards,
John
Short answer here is no risk of anything. STIs cannot be passed by touching with hands. It just doesnt happen.
8 Comments
Thank you for the quick response.
I do however have some more questions. Does the fact that I shaved my nether region earlier that day make any difference in the risk? Minor cuts that would have made it easier for STI germs to enter my body?
Also, the girl kissed me on the mouth a few times. I did not really kiss back, so there was not much contact, and certainly no tongue. Is there a risk of oral herpes here? At first glance she did not seem to have cold sores.
Thanks a lot in advance for your feedback. I have a lot of anxiety about this. By far the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life...
I do however have some more questions. Does the fact that I shaved my nether region earlier that day make any difference in the risk? Minor cuts that would have made it easier for STI germs to enter my body?
Also, the girl kissed me on the mouth a few times. I did not really kiss back, so there was not much contact, and certainly no tongue. Is there a risk of oral herpes here? At first glance she did not seem to have cold sores.
Thanks a lot in advance for your feedback. I have a lot of anxiety about this. By far the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life...
Shaving does not increase any risk.
Minor cuts does not either - maybe if it was a large gaping wounds, but this wasnt.
Kissing could transmit herpes if theres an outbreak but for the short time and the fact you did not see any sores I would not worry at all.
As AJ would say, guilt does not equal risk ok? You have no risk of any thing here. Step back, breathe and move on :)
Minor cuts does not either - maybe if it was a large gaping wounds, but this wasnt.
Kissing could transmit herpes if theres an outbreak but for the short time and the fact you did not see any sores I would not worry at all.
As AJ would say, guilt does not equal risk ok? You have no risk of any thing here. Step back, breathe and move on :)
Thank you for your kind response.
A hopefully last worrysome thought crossed my mind today. I remember after rubbing her clitoris/vagina, I caressed her breasts with the same hand, after which I also sucked her nipples.
Does this mean indirect genital to oral contact? Is this a risk of STI transmission?
Thank you for any feedback... This forum helped me a lot already! You are doing a wonderful thing here.
And yes, I do feel very guilty. Too bad this feeling always comes after the facts and not before.
I decided I am going to seek professional help for my anxiety.
A hopefully last worrysome thought crossed my mind today. I remember after rubbing her clitoris/vagina, I caressed her breasts with the same hand, after which I also sucked her nipples.
Does this mean indirect genital to oral contact? Is this a risk of STI transmission?
Thank you for any feedback... This forum helped me a lot already! You are doing a wonderful thing here.
And yes, I do feel very guilty. Too bad this feeling always comes after the facts and not before.
I decided I am going to seek professional help for my anxiety.
These indirect contacts and touches - that's not how STDs are transmitted. It's really not that easy.
STDs are transmitted by penetration (oral, vaginal, anal) or direct, unclothed skin to skin contact - oral to oral, oral to genital/ana;, genital to genital, or genital to anal. This kind of contact takes some friction, usually the kind associated with oral sex or penetrative sex, so think a lot of grinding or rubbing. A brief kiss or touch isn't going to transmit anything.
I'm super happy to hear you are going to get some help for anxiety. Anxiety is harder to deal with than most STDs.
STDs are transmitted by penetration (oral, vaginal, anal) or direct, unclothed skin to skin contact - oral to oral, oral to genital/ana;, genital to genital, or genital to anal. This kind of contact takes some friction, usually the kind associated with oral sex or penetrative sex, so think a lot of grinding or rubbing. A brief kiss or touch isn't going to transmit anything.
I'm super happy to hear you are going to get some help for anxiety. Anxiety is harder to deal with than most STDs.
In response to the anxiety. It's been really bad the past week. Daily panic attacks. It's practically eating me alive. I scheduled a first session with a psychotherapist the end of next week. In the meantime it's really hard to keep a lid on it. I know this forum isn't an anxiety help forum, but right now this is the only place I feel I can to get some kind of relief by browsing through the forum pages.
Regarding the herpes risk, so I'm at day 10 now. So far no obvious cold sores. My lips are irritated a lot, but I recon this is because I rubbed them with alcohol hand sanitizer after the fact... If I make it to day 12 without any cold sores developing, could I safely assume I did not contract herpes? Would there be a possibility I'm asymptomatic from the start?
Does it make any sense to test for any other STD's from this encounter? Such as chlamydia, ghonoroe, syphilis?
Or would that be completely overkill in this situation?
I cannot express enough how much these responses mean to me. I am completely blown away about what you guys are doing here. This is truly a rare place on the internet.
Regarding the herpes risk, so I'm at day 10 now. So far no obvious cold sores. My lips are irritated a lot, but I recon this is because I rubbed them with alcohol hand sanitizer after the fact... If I make it to day 12 without any cold sores developing, could I safely assume I did not contract herpes? Would there be a possibility I'm asymptomatic from the start?
Does it make any sense to test for any other STD's from this encounter? Such as chlamydia, ghonoroe, syphilis?
Or would that be completely overkill in this situation?
I cannot express enough how much these responses mean to me. I am completely blown away about what you guys are doing here. This is truly a rare place on the internet.
You had NO RISK from this event. NONE. You don't need to test because you had no risk.
I wouldn't worry about cold sores. You don't even know if you already have oral hsv1 - 67% of people under 50 globally have it - and not much is going to change between days 10 and 12. If you get a cold sore, it might be from stress and/or alcohol irritating your lips triggering an outbreak.
If you are getting daily panic attacks, please contact your doctor. You probably need medication as well as therapy.
I'm happy we are helping, but this reaction is completely out of proportion to the risk.
(Also, let's keep all your responses to this thread so it's easier for me to keep up with. Thanks.)
I wouldn't worry about cold sores. You don't even know if you already have oral hsv1 - 67% of people under 50 globally have it - and not much is going to change between days 10 and 12. If you get a cold sore, it might be from stress and/or alcohol irritating your lips triggering an outbreak.
If you are getting daily panic attacks, please contact your doctor. You probably need medication as well as therapy.
I'm happy we are helping, but this reaction is completely out of proportion to the risk.
(Also, let's keep all your responses to this thread so it's easier for me to keep up with. Thanks.)
Did you even kiss the person who gave you the massage? If you didn't, this is all anxiety.
The girl who gave me the massage did kiss me on the mouth three times. I did not want to kiss, so I didn't really kiss back. I just kept my lips closed. It was more of a peck on the lips. I checked with the place I was at, and they assured me the girl did not have and never had cold sores/herpes nor has any other disease.
The thing is... I have a pregnant girlfriend at home, with an unknown hsv1 status. I read that getting hsv can be really bad during pregnancy and extremely bad for a baby. I just didn't know beforehand this was a risk. But I don't even know my own hsv status (never got tested for it). I'm terrified I did something horrible here (hence the constant state of panic). I know I'm a terrible, selfish and stupidly irresponsible person because of this, and I will never forgive myself for what I did.
I just don't know where to go from here...
The girl who gave me the massage did kiss me on the mouth three times. I did not want to kiss, so I didn't really kiss back. I just kept my lips closed. It was more of a peck on the lips. I checked with the place I was at, and they assured me the girl did not have and never had cold sores/herpes nor has any other disease.
The thing is... I have a pregnant girlfriend at home, with an unknown hsv1 status. I read that getting hsv can be really bad during pregnancy and extremely bad for a baby. I just didn't know beforehand this was a risk. But I don't even know my own hsv status (never got tested for it). I'm terrified I did something horrible here (hence the constant state of panic). I know I'm a terrible, selfish and stupidly irresponsible person because of this, and I will never forgive myself for what I did.
I just don't know where to go from here...
Get an hsv1 test. Go to your doctor and get help for your anxiety. Go to therapy.
You are not the first man here that has cheated on his pregnant girlfriend and then had terrible anxiety after. There is only so much we can do, though. We are not trained therapists, so you really don't want us providing mental health services.
Tell your girlfriend that a dude at work was talking about the testing his wife had to go through (or you saw it on TV or whatever works for you), and ask her what testing she's had. Find out if she's had herpes testing, and that you think it's a good idea if you get tested for herpes. It's possible you both have hsv1.
You aren't a terrible person, and we don't judge here. Taking some steps to help yourself can help you feel like you have a sense of control. So talk to your doctor, take the test, and get your therapy.
Your risk is so low for hsv1, and no risk for anything else. LET IT GO. Find ways to do that.
You are not the first man here that has cheated on his pregnant girlfriend and then had terrible anxiety after. There is only so much we can do, though. We are not trained therapists, so you really don't want us providing mental health services.
Tell your girlfriend that a dude at work was talking about the testing his wife had to go through (or you saw it on TV or whatever works for you), and ask her what testing she's had. Find out if she's had herpes testing, and that you think it's a good idea if you get tested for herpes. It's possible you both have hsv1.
You aren't a terrible person, and we don't judge here. Taking some steps to help yourself can help you feel like you have a sense of control. So talk to your doctor, take the test, and get your therapy.
Your risk is so low for hsv1, and no risk for anything else. LET IT GO. Find ways to do that.
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You are reading content posted in the STDs / STIs Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
