Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.
You are asking some of the most common and basic questions about genital HPV infections. I'll reply briefly to your specific questions. However, I recommend that you also read the thread linked below -- as well as the several other threads linked there.
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/STDs/HPV-concerns/show/1819004
1) You can assume you have had (and maybe still have) a genital infection with the HPV strain that caused your partner's abnormal pap. If so, it's from genital sex, not oral. Condoms reduce but do not entirely prevent genital to genital transmission; even with consistent condom use, you can assume you have (or had) a genital HPV infection.
2) HPV spreads locally. For example, an infection acquired on the penis may spread to the scrotum or anal area, but as far as we know, it doesn't travel through the body.
3) Excellent question -- without a clear answer. To my knowledge, this has never been studied. My guess is that if someone has infection at more than one site -- e.g. both genital and oral -- that when it clears at one site, it will also clear at the other.
4) If there is a link between HPV and these problems, almost certainly it is indirect -- and for sure HPV isn't the only cause (and almost certainly not the main cause) of either heart disease or prostate cancer.
5) You need not say anything to future partners. What to say (and not to say) to partners is discussed in one or more of the other threads linked above.
6) There is no readily available test for HPV in men, and no need for it. You're going to get HPV, probably several times -- we all get it. Knowing that an asymptomatic infection is present doesn't provide any useful information, does not protect health, and doesn't protect partners.
HPV is a complex issue, but the bottom line is that it's mostly harmless. You are much more concerned about it than you should be. It's a part of life -- not worth a lot of worry.
Best wishes-- HHH, MD