early testing

[worriedman888]

So I was with a woman this past weekend, and midway through she told me that she had Genital Herpes HSV II.
We had not had sex, but had already been kissing alot and touching and messing around. I had masterbated her with my fingers and she had inserted her fingers into her vagina, and had masterbated me with that hand. There might have been some slight contact with my penis and her vagina,  beacuse of how we were laying, but it was not inserted.

So now I am freaked out. It is now the 5th day since that night and I am very worried. What makes it worse is that I noticed a small area on the shaft of my penis (about 1/8 of an inch diameter circle) that does not have skin on it. I do not know if this came from all the rubbing or what. It does not have any blisters, or puss, and I do not have any kind of pain at all. No discharge or anything at all.....but I cannot get this out of my mind. I have looked at all the picures online and nothing compares to what I have.

I have read about getting a culture or a swab of infected areas, but there is nothing to swab and I noticed the area 2 nights a go, and now it is almost healed over.

Is there a test that can detect this early?

Is there a specific test blood or whatever that can determine if I did get infected this early? If so would you tellme the specific name of the test, because it seemd like there are so many out there (with false positives or need so long to be in your system)

HELP !! I AM SO FREAKING OUT>
Please give me some advise!

Worriedman888

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Please try to relax.  The nature of your exposure makes herpes VERY unlikely.  The virus does not live well outside of the body and in not effectively tranmitted by genital to hand to genital contact.  

In addition, let me tell you that you are lucky .  She knew she had herpes and told you.  This means that she was taking the precautions needed to keep from giving it to you.  To put this in context, remember that about 1 in 4 American women have herpes but, of those who do, only 1 in 10 knows it--those are the peole who spread the most infections, not those who know it and disclose to partners.  

If you have a sore or open spot, then that could e cultured.  But, as you point out, what you ahve now certainly does not sound like herpes.  Getting a swab from an area that has already healed is not a good use of time or money.  Initial herpes lesions last about two weeks, not two days.

No there is not good blood test for herpes to tell if you good herpes.  On average, it takes about three weeks after lesions appear for tests to be positive and in some people it can take as long as 6 months.

Hope this is helpful.  EWH

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Once again, for starters, the nature of your exposure was low risk.  No penetration and indirect exposures at best.  All of this makes it unlikely that your acquired herpes. As for your questions:

1.  Cuts on your fingers might increase your risk for getting a herpetic whitlow but not herpes of the penis.  You said nothing to suggest you got a whitlow.
2.  of course you can keep your eyes open for sores.  The issue is that you really weren't exposed as noted above.
3.  You might ask her if she was taking suppressive antiviral therapy but that's about the only thing of import.

Overall, I think your anxiety is out of proportion to you risk.  Your partner is acting responsibly and that is a good thing (as I said before, not everyone would have done so).  My advice would be to discuss the issues with her, use condoms, have her consider suppressive therapy but that's really about it.  EWH

[worriedman888]

So a quick healing sore does not sound like a prime candidate for Herpes? I noticed the "raw spot" on Tuesday nite, and now it is all about gone. It was never "wet" or puss filled, and never had any soreness or pain. I was hoping it was from the rubbing she did of her hand to my penis with no lub and a lot of rubbing.

1) Would it make any difference on getting herpes if I had any unhealed cuts on my fingers since I had "fingered" her?  

2) Should I just keep an eye out for any more sores or places on my penis to be sure? could the sores show up any where else?

Also I have opened up the subject to her just saying that I was nervous about the situation b/c I did not know enough about it.

3)  IS there anything you sugest that I ask her about her herpes or medications (she might or might no take) , or outbreaks, or anything of the sort. She has opened herself up with "ask me anything you want", but I am unclear what to ask?

Any other advice you  have would be great.

Thanks so so much.
This anonymous medical advice is a priceless help to people...I know it is and has been for me. Thank you. You look ths stuff up online and it is like a roller coaster of scary.

worriedman888