I went through the same situation regarding fears I had going for help because I thought they would have my daughter removed from my home; instead, they did my assessment and diagnosed me as having BiPolar, then they paired me up with a great Psychiatrist. They knew I had a clear understanding of my illness, I sought help! I told them I had suicidal thoughts with intentions of taking my only child with me but I also told them that I knew it was wrong and I was very aware that what I was feeling could be fixed! Because I was honest, they did not have concerns. They specifically asked me if I would do it, I said no, it was a thought, not one that I would ever act on! It is wrong, no matter how hopeless you feel! One very important thing I've learned over the years, never give up on yourself or your family! Most importantly, Never GIVE UP ON YOUR MEDS; furthermore, if you don't feel good or right on a specific medicine, DON'T GIVE UP! Talk to your Dr. about all the different medications out there and your feelings or reactions to the meds you try. Last thing, if you approach the Dr. and your just starting on new meds, ask him to start you on a low dose and work your way up because sometimes if you start off on too high of dose, right off the bat, it can scare you off from trying other meds or even going back for treatment that can save your life! WORK WITH YOUR DOCTOR. My very best wishes to you and your family, God bless.
people respond differently to meds keep in touch with the p-doc let him know all your side effects drink plenty of water also talk to others you are not alone hope this helps :)