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Orgasm help??

Not sure if this is this is the right place to be posting this, but I was hoping to get some help about female orgasm/masturbation. I have never "felt the tinglies" of an orgasm from sex, but I think I have from masturbation. But I can't find much help online for how I masturbate. To cut to the chase it's basically just rubbing up against a chair or some hard surface I can kinda spread my legs over :/ I think I've orgasmed from this (felt my"walls" contracting and my back will kinda ripple with the feeling). However, in recent years I've had trouble doing even this by myself (still feels good, but no "ripple"). I'm in my early twenties so I would't think age would be a problem (even though I've been rub mastubating since like 1st grade). I'm not even sure exactly what it is I'm rubbing so I haven't been able to figure out how to do it laying down (basically I always have to use a chair, annoying).  I have tried fingering myself, but this has never worked. Feels nice, but never got me close at all. Same with trying to rub my clit (I'm not actually sure where it is or how to rub it right, always kinda hurts when I rub to hard or upwards and when I gentle caress it really doesn't do much to light the spark. I've gone at it for long time periods trying to see, but not anything crazy). When I have sex with my boyfriend, it feels good, but I've never reached any climax point. It'll feel good for a bit but then he'll have to stop or else he'll get too far. We've done lots of positions (I've tried experimenting) but nothing really seems to work. One position will feel good one time, then I'll basically feel nothing the next time. It's very frustrating and I feel I have a lot of pent up sexual energy from it. At this point I want sex way more often and am much needier than my boyfriend. He has tried even "going down" on me and again, it feels fine, but nothing mind-blowing :/ I really want to be able to understand better how exactly I'm masturbating when I rub, and how to transfer this to the bedroom, I want to share this experience with my boyfriend. If anyone has any help or tips (again, I've googled my fair share of articles and tried lots, but none seem to cover the "how to rub your clit if it doesn't feel good and hurts when you try with your hand and where it is exactly" problem and no one really talks about rubbing against chairs or whatever and what it is I'm doing so I can transfer that over to the bed (literally, chairs are annoying...)). If anyone has advice or wants to offer help I'd greatly appreciate it.
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139792 tn?1498585650
COMMUNITY LEADER
If your boy friend, touches your right shoulder with his left shoulder, he will be rubbing your clitoris properly. It should be in a missionary position. If you are on top, you can adjust in such a way that it rubs your clitoris. For masturbation, move your fingers around clitoris. Clitoris is very sensitive as it is ending of many nerves. . For more details google female masturbation. you may also use toys. Do kegel exercises or Female deer exercises which will give many health benefit.Google both the exercises.  Try this one; Sit cross legged on the floor. Bring your hill of one leg near the mouth of vagina and try to lean forward.This is one of good posture.If possible you should be without under cloth.
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Avatar universal
My first wife had a similar issue. She thought she was having orgasms, but as our relationship progressed, she realized they were only precursors to orgasms. With time, they became more intense. It seemed like every few months, she would reach a new high and realize the last one wasn't quite it. She explained that she felt she was holding back because as the feeling intensified, she often felt a little discomfort or like she might pee. At that point she would hold back and be satisfied with what she had experienced so far. It took about 6 years until she really really peaked to the full extent possible.
I think as she understood her body more and more, things naturally progressed. I can imagine the frustration one might have trying to reach that plateau though.
Hopefully your partner will be understanding and patient and will work with your as you learn more and more what it takes to please you in the way your unique body and mind need.
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139792 tn?1498585650
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