Aa
sex after menopause
I am 48 yrs old, I had a hysterectomy 8 yrs ago and just recently (June 2010) had both ovaries and fallopian tubes removed due to a 12 cm complex (benign) cyst. Minor menopausal symptoms started straight away, sleepless nights, headaches ect. after 2 weeks the crying started. feelings of not being a women anymore.
I have been in a relationship with a man for the past 5 years and sexual relationship has always been well above average.
I feel like I have lost sexual sensations in my body.I think my sex drive is still there, I think about sex but my body does not seem to respond. My breasts use to be very sensitive but now just feels like 2 lumps of flesh. I don't get wet anymore, we used to use a towel every time we made love because I got so wet, now nothing, I feel that my mind is responding but my body is not.
I am a strong minded woman and thought I could deal with any problems I had. But when my body doesn't respond my mind takes over and I'm finding it harder and harder not fall into a depression.
The loss of sexual sensation is devastating to me.
I am a single mum, middle to low income earner, I don't have a health care card or private health insurance. So a specialist or naturopath is out of the question, I simply cant afford it.
Finding a local GP who understands sexual issues with menopause is difficult. when I spoke to my regular GP all she heard was hot flashes, she dismissed my sexual concerns as minor.
what can i do
I have been in a relationship with a man for the past 5 years and sexual relationship has always been well above average.
I feel like I have lost sexual sensations in my body.I think my sex drive is still there, I think about sex but my body does not seem to respond. My breasts use to be very sensitive but now just feels like 2 lumps of flesh. I don't get wet anymore, we used to use a towel every time we made love because I got so wet, now nothing, I feel that my mind is responding but my body is not.
I am a strong minded woman and thought I could deal with any problems I had. But when my body doesn't respond my mind takes over and I'm finding it harder and harder not fall into a depression.
The loss of sexual sensation is devastating to me.
I am a single mum, middle to low income earner, I don't have a health care card or private health insurance. So a specialist or naturopath is out of the question, I simply cant afford it.
Finding a local GP who understands sexual issues with menopause is difficult. when I spoke to my regular GP all she heard was hot flashes, she dismissed my sexual concerns as minor.
what can i do
My wife had a complete hysterectomy with similar outcome to yours. Look into a small amount of hormone replacement. That's all my wife required. That may be all you need.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Serious Sam is an expert in sexuality subject. His advices are practical.
If you like doing exercises, one simple exercise is Keger exercise. this akin to sahjoli kriya in yoga. Research Kegel exercises and Sddh yoni mudra. they might help you. masagin perineum can also help.
Hormone replacement therapy is strongly indicate when both the overies are removed or when one reaches manopausal age.
If you like doing exercises, one simple exercise is Keger exercise. this akin to sahjoli kriya in yoga. Research Kegel exercises and Sddh yoni mudra. they might help you. masagin perineum can also help.
Hormone replacement therapy is strongly indicate when both the overies are removed or when one reaches manopausal age.
My hysterectomy was 8 yrs ago and I sailed through it, i was back at work after 2 weeks, I have had many surgeries and I always recover well. the point is, I know my body. Estrogen will probable help with the headaches and hot flushes, but these things dont bother me like the loss off sexual sensation.
"Most women undergo menopause over a period of months or even years"
Thats because the ovaries gradually stop producing hormones
Surgical menopause is instant and symptoms are usually more severe.
Can anyone tell me that HRT will restore my sex drive and sexual sensations to just the way they were before,? or is that gone for ever?
"Most women undergo menopause over a period of months or even years"
Thats because the ovaries gradually stop producing hormones
Surgical menopause is instant and symptoms are usually more severe.
Can anyone tell me that HRT will restore my sex drive and sexual sensations to just the way they were before,? or is that gone for ever?
Honestly there are several herbs that can help as they have analogs to estrogen but really a cheap hormonal patch is really the only sure way to restore full responsiveness,
But having had several women in my past as lovers who had hysterectomies please allow me to point out two things? You are still recovering from surgery on several levels psychologically and physically. Most women undergo menopause over a period of months or even years, pregnancy on a hormonal level takes 4 years to recover from. I am sure you are a remarkable person but you need to give your body at least a small amount of time to heal and reach an equilibrium.
But having had several women in my past as lovers who had hysterectomies please allow me to point out two things? You are still recovering from surgery on several levels psychologically and physically. Most women undergo menopause over a period of months or even years, pregnancy on a hormonal level takes 4 years to recover from. I am sure you are a remarkable person but you need to give your body at least a small amount of time to heal and reach an equilibrium.
COMMUNITY LEADER
You had your ovaries removed. This means your not producing the hormones your need. You might want to talk to your Dr about hormone replacement. This could really help with your sex life, sleepless nights, headaches and crying spells. I take a generic hormone because I had a complete hysterectomy. It's very inexpensive. Remar
Thank you for replying,
I will look into Lavada, but as I said, I feel my libido is still there, its just that my body is not responding, the sensations are gone.
I have tried masterbating and with a vibrator, as well as mental stimulation (fantasy).
but nothing happens,
I want back what I had before, I dont want to just 'get by" i want to be like i was before.
I was married for 24 yrs where sex was for his pleasure only. I have really only discovered good sex in the last 5 yrs, only had my first real orgasm 5 yrs ago, prior to surgery I had multiple orgasms everytime we made love, my breasts responded to the slightest touch even from me, now there is nothing, this is not fair, no one told me this would happen, had i known i would have begged the surgon to leave 1 ovariy at least.
Im sorry, im crying again now, this is very important to me,
I keep reading where people are saying sex isnt everything, quality of life is more important
I feel the people who say sex isnt everything are people who have never had great sex.
I will look into Lavada, but as I said, I feel my libido is still there, its just that my body is not responding, the sensations are gone.
I have tried masterbating and with a vibrator, as well as mental stimulation (fantasy).
but nothing happens,
I want back what I had before, I dont want to just 'get by" i want to be like i was before.
I was married for 24 yrs where sex was for his pleasure only. I have really only discovered good sex in the last 5 yrs, only had my first real orgasm 5 yrs ago, prior to surgery I had multiple orgasms everytime we made love, my breasts responded to the slightest touch even from me, now there is nothing, this is not fair, no one told me this would happen, had i known i would have begged the surgon to leave 1 ovariy at least.
Im sorry, im crying again now, this is very important to me,
I keep reading where people are saying sex isnt everything, quality of life is more important
I feel the people who say sex isnt everything are people who have never had great sex.
I'm Peri-Menopausal and I totally empathize... might I suggest a topical hormone cream
to enhance vaginal sensations. Also, you might consider trying non-prescription herbal dietary supplements that are specifically formulated to boost the female libido and promote vaginal wetness. The supplement that I have experience with is called, Lavada and, it's available over the internet. It's not a miracle remedy by any stretch of the imagination... plus, it's a bit pricey at about $25 American dollars for a 30 day supply... but, I found it to be effective enough to use on a semi-regular basis and to recommend to others.
Also, seeing that lubricants and oral sex are out for you... how about masturbating with a vibrator? It can be a very effective means of sexual stimulation... not to replace intimacy... but rather as an aid to induce sexual pleasure.
to enhance vaginal sensations. Also, you might consider trying non-prescription herbal dietary supplements that are specifically formulated to boost the female libido and promote vaginal wetness. The supplement that I have experience with is called, Lavada and, it's available over the internet. It's not a miracle remedy by any stretch of the imagination... plus, it's a bit pricey at about $25 American dollars for a 30 day supply... but, I found it to be effective enough to use on a semi-regular basis and to recommend to others.
Also, seeing that lubricants and oral sex are out for you... how about masturbating with a vibrator? It can be a very effective means of sexual stimulation... not to replace intimacy... but rather as an aid to induce sexual pleasure.
Please dont sugest lubricants as this idea is not appealing to me. it doesnt bring back my lost sensations, and going from penetration to oral would not be fun.
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Sexual Health Community
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
Discharge often isn't normal, and could mean an infection or an STD.
STDs aren't transmitted through clothing. Fabric is a germ barrier.
Normal vaginal discharge varies in color, smell, texture and amount.
