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Embarrasing Thoughts Make Me Blurt Out Things
When I think of an embarrassing moment (whether it be real or imaginary) I will blurt out a swear, or perhaps a sentence like, "I love you (insert name)". I believe I do that as a means to "snap me out of" the moment so as not to re-experience the feelings the embarrassment caused, or causes, or to just end the momentary thought before it completes.
I would say that 50% of the time I blurt out some kind of swears or a sentence with a swear in it. The other 50% I have this habit of saying "I love you (insert ex gf's name)" or some other name. I must interject at this point that I am happily married and have no interest in any past gf's. But for some reason, the one name I usually insert is an ex-gf who I was overly in love with and who did end up dumping me. Which is fine by me now because I have an awesome wife and a wonderful family. And I am not supressing any deep down desires for my ex....believe me on that. When I do this most is when I am by myself and therefore, dealing with the gazillion thoughts that race thru my mind every minute. Sometimes my mind is like a runaway train. And eventually, the thoughts come back to an embarrassing moment, or a situation I make up in my mind that would embarass me, and I blurt something out, I thought out of habit to snap me out of the moment. Sometimes I blurt something out and one of my kids or my wifes hears me and will ask me what I was saying. Most times I can cover up what I said with some kind of excuse about what I was talking about. One time I was in the bathroom and, in the middle of an embarrasing thought, I blurted out, "I hate you!". My wife happened to be walking by the bathroom at that second and heard me and she thought I was referring to her which I wasn't. So we had a big to-do about that. Of course I"m scared to death that I will blurt out my ex-gf's name and she will hear me and she'll freak. It does seem to be worse when I am really stressed. I am not nearly as stressed as I used to be probably because I have learned how to deal with it in many ways including meditation. Thank God for meditation. Best part of my day.
Anyways I'd like to know if this happens to you and if you have any techniques to control these outbursts? Thank you.
I would say that 50% of the time I blurt out some kind of swears or a sentence with a swear in it. The other 50% I have this habit of saying "I love you (insert ex gf's name)" or some other name. I must interject at this point that I am happily married and have no interest in any past gf's. But for some reason, the one name I usually insert is an ex-gf who I was overly in love with and who did end up dumping me. Which is fine by me now because I have an awesome wife and a wonderful family. And I am not supressing any deep down desires for my ex....believe me on that. When I do this most is when I am by myself and therefore, dealing with the gazillion thoughts that race thru my mind every minute. Sometimes my mind is like a runaway train. And eventually, the thoughts come back to an embarrassing moment, or a situation I make up in my mind that would embarass me, and I blurt something out, I thought out of habit to snap me out of the moment. Sometimes I blurt something out and one of my kids or my wifes hears me and will ask me what I was saying. Most times I can cover up what I said with some kind of excuse about what I was talking about. One time I was in the bathroom and, in the middle of an embarrasing thought, I blurted out, "I hate you!". My wife happened to be walking by the bathroom at that second and heard me and she thought I was referring to her which I wasn't. So we had a big to-do about that. Of course I"m scared to death that I will blurt out my ex-gf's name and she will hear me and she'll freak. It does seem to be worse when I am really stressed. I am not nearly as stressed as I used to be probably because I have learned how to deal with it in many ways including meditation. Thank God for meditation. Best part of my day.
Anyways I'd like to know if this happens to you and if you have any techniques to control these outbursts? Thank you.
I have had the same thing happening to me when I'm alone. I'll have an embarrassing thuoght or a shamfull thought of a past event. At that moment where the thought make me fell bad or embarrassed I burt out my wife's name and somtimes the word "help". There are time's that curse words will be in a sentence. Latey I have been blurting with the wife in the roomm with words and phrases like "goddammit" and "oh my god" and she'll ask me "what?" and I'll feel embarrassed and roll out some excuse for what I said, Like "man today was a long day" My mind is always filled with useless thuoght's. I've been having truoble latley finishing anything at work or at home without stoping and starting somthing eles that i'll never finish. ADD, ADHD, Tourette's whatever it is I have atleast acknowleged it.
2 Comments
Yes! I live in Finland. I shout often involuntary (in Finnish) "I will kill you", or "I am so drunk." I used to be normal, but these kind of problems started when I accepted my free swine flu shot in an university. That was about 7 years ago...
Yes! I live in Finland. I shout often involuntary (in Finnish) "I will kill you", or "I am so drunk." I used to be normal, but these kind of problems started when I accepted my free swine flu shot in an university. That was about 7 years ago...
From reading the posts, it seems that we all have the same issue. And the commonality for most is that our blurt is triggered by an embarrassing thought. What also is becoming apparent is that the words we blurt have little or nothing to do with the embarrassing thought. Myself, I go through different phases of what I blurt. My current blurt is usually "TERRY!" I have no idea why. I don't even know anyone called Terry. But I have blurted other things in the past. Can anyone shed any light on how our minds pick our blurt words?
1 Comments
I yell all kinds of things. I've been saying DaViD, JaCoB, and CRaiG. Have no idea why. I'm sure you know the feeling. I can't help but laugh. I'm glad I'm not alone.
Welp I'll go ahead and be the first comment (as far as I can tell) from the Covid pandemic-- which has definitely increased the habit for me, living alone in lockdown! I have done this since I was in high school at least, but I find I've been doing this a lot more in the past few years (I'm now in my late 20s.). I tend to blurt out that I either love or hate my ex-boyfriend too! Wow! It was a very intense, often all-consuming relationship during late teens/early 20s, and it ended rather badly. I wish him well, but I am certainly not in love with him anymore and have no desire even to see him again. Pesky man that he always was, he pops up, though, when I have an embarrassing or troubling thought. This can be anything from things I actually regret/cause me to feel genuine and deserved remorse to silly things like being late to respond to a work email. I think about these things and suddenly, without even thinking about it, I'm saying in a short quick sentence, "I love __" or "I hate ___" (Depending on my mood? My tic seems capricious, and I'm unable to tell which kinds of thoughts prompt which kind of response?)
I have a couple of others that are a bit odd, but seem related/similar to some other people's expressions on here. These are, I think, new since I have been in lockdown and working remotely due to Covid. I have a lot more of that unstructured alone/quiet time (which I actually highly value-- I, like a lot of people on here, really love and value my creativity and like to spend a lot of time writing, knitting, sewing, and dreaming up ideas around all three crafts), and that, of course, means more embarrassing daydreams and more blurting out! Just as I was once highly invested in making a relationship work with my ex, I was once equally invested in going to graduate school. I'm now almost finished with my PhD, but I will sometimes blurt out "I really hope I get into grad school" or "I wonder where I'll go to grad school." Grad school is almost over for me. This is hilarious. This happened before the pandemic, but it has intensified for some reason lately. I do have one that's completely new (thanks, Covid) that I think must have been brought on by the very specific context of the pandemic. I have lately started to blurt out "I wonder how old I will be when I die?" and sometimes I'll then blurt out a few numbers (potential ages?-- though some are younger than I am now-- i.e. I can't possibly die at 16, when I'm a grown woman in my late twenties). When the pandemic first began, especially, I felt frightened about death and the idea that a deadly virus might even be wiping out humanity on earth. I said and did a few embarrassing things (e.g. showing affection to an attractive neighbor), that I don't think I would have said or done if I hadn't been experiencing anxieties about mortality and the spread of a deadly virus. Now that (knock on wood) it seems that this terrible and deadly virus has done so many awful things but hasn't actually wiped out humanity and probably won't, I'm hoping this more morbid "when will I die" version of the blurting will go away? Or at least... that it will go away once I can safely return to working in person-- it would be awkward to do this in front of say... students in my classroom or patrons at the library where I sometimes pick up a few hours of work each week!
I'll end by saying something I wish I had seen more of on here: I totally understand that this is distressing (it bothered me enough to look it up and contribute to the forum, after all!), but I also want to acknowledge that this "problem" is a fairly benign one to have. This is definitely not my favorite thing about myself, but I am committed to making sure I don't use it as a reason to hate myself, and I don't want to "cure" it if that makes sense? I see a therapist so that I can let go of past shame, build my self-esteem, and identify/sustain healthy relationship dynamics, and I'm proud of my progress in those areas. If I blurt out some odd things here and there, welp... if this pandemic has taught me anything, it's that blurting out my ex-boyfriend's name here and there really doesn't have much power in my life. It's funny, but it doesn't matter nearly as much as healing some of the thoughts/impulses/memories that prompted the quirk in the first place...
I have a couple of others that are a bit odd, but seem related/similar to some other people's expressions on here. These are, I think, new since I have been in lockdown and working remotely due to Covid. I have a lot more of that unstructured alone/quiet time (which I actually highly value-- I, like a lot of people on here, really love and value my creativity and like to spend a lot of time writing, knitting, sewing, and dreaming up ideas around all three crafts), and that, of course, means more embarrassing daydreams and more blurting out! Just as I was once highly invested in making a relationship work with my ex, I was once equally invested in going to graduate school. I'm now almost finished with my PhD, but I will sometimes blurt out "I really hope I get into grad school" or "I wonder where I'll go to grad school." Grad school is almost over for me. This is hilarious. This happened before the pandemic, but it has intensified for some reason lately. I do have one that's completely new (thanks, Covid) that I think must have been brought on by the very specific context of the pandemic. I have lately started to blurt out "I wonder how old I will be when I die?" and sometimes I'll then blurt out a few numbers (potential ages?-- though some are younger than I am now-- i.e. I can't possibly die at 16, when I'm a grown woman in my late twenties). When the pandemic first began, especially, I felt frightened about death and the idea that a deadly virus might even be wiping out humanity on earth. I said and did a few embarrassing things (e.g. showing affection to an attractive neighbor), that I don't think I would have said or done if I hadn't been experiencing anxieties about mortality and the spread of a deadly virus. Now that (knock on wood) it seems that this terrible and deadly virus has done so many awful things but hasn't actually wiped out humanity and probably won't, I'm hoping this more morbid "when will I die" version of the blurting will go away? Or at least... that it will go away once I can safely return to working in person-- it would be awkward to do this in front of say... students in my classroom or patrons at the library where I sometimes pick up a few hours of work each week!
I'll end by saying something I wish I had seen more of on here: I totally understand that this is distressing (it bothered me enough to look it up and contribute to the forum, after all!), but I also want to acknowledge that this "problem" is a fairly benign one to have. This is definitely not my favorite thing about myself, but I am committed to making sure I don't use it as a reason to hate myself, and I don't want to "cure" it if that makes sense? I see a therapist so that I can let go of past shame, build my self-esteem, and identify/sustain healthy relationship dynamics, and I'm proud of my progress in those areas. If I blurt out some odd things here and there, welp... if this pandemic has taught me anything, it's that blurting out my ex-boyfriend's name here and there really doesn't have much power in my life. It's funny, but it doesn't matter nearly as much as healing some of the thoughts/impulses/memories that prompted the quirk in the first place...
So what the hell is this called and what can you take if anything to help it? besides magnesium. What is the actual diagnosis
My behavior is very similar, with just one difference. I don't "blurt" anything out, but rather have some physical reaction, like whipping my head to the side or clinching up my fists/abdomen. Occasionally I will make a noise to go with it, but nothing intelligible.
It's typically triggered by embarrassing or humiliating moment memories. Being bullied in junior high, the dramatic things I used to say, stuff that later just made me look foolish or that I looked like I had an inferior intellect or character.
I often have to explain the "quiet outburst" or try to cover it up. Even the outbursts themselves become an embarrassing thing to remember (triggering an outburst LOL).
History: I am an extremely creative person who has been on several anti-depressant meds (for several years) prior to these outbursts. I also accidentally took a 220V charge to my arm while trying to repair something I thought was not charged. I am a father of four, in my 40s, successful career in Technical Writing, conditions or medical problems other than chronic chemical depression (not emotional).
It's typically triggered by embarrassing or humiliating moment memories. Being bullied in junior high, the dramatic things I used to say, stuff that later just made me look foolish or that I looked like I had an inferior intellect or character.
I often have to explain the "quiet outburst" or try to cover it up. Even the outbursts themselves become an embarrassing thing to remember (triggering an outburst LOL).
History: I am an extremely creative person who has been on several anti-depressant meds (for several years) prior to these outbursts. I also accidentally took a 220V charge to my arm while trying to repair something I thought was not charged. I am a father of four, in my 40s, successful career in Technical Writing, conditions or medical problems other than chronic chemical depression (not emotional).
I started looking at this thread a few years ago after googling "blurting out when I think of an embarrassing moment". I was so surprised to see so many responses that literally mirrored my experiences with this. Some of them are eerily similar, such as my wife hearing me blurt while I was alone using the bathroom and she says "What did you just say", and I had to respond "Uh, Nothing!". It's crazy I checked back tonight after a especially bad week of blurting due to stress at work and I see s0 many new responses over the past couple years. I figure it's time I shared my story so others can hear it as well.
I have had this issue for at least 4-5 years now and I am 28 currently. I usually blurt when I think of any embarrassing moment. They most often occur when I think about a social situation, one that I thought was awkward, or I said the wrong thing, or minor conflicts at work. My main blurt for the past couple years has been is usually "I love babies". Not sure why this is, I worked as a pediatric RN for a couple years, and I do have two daughters, but I don't know why this is what I blurt. If I am in the car on the way to work and I know no one can hear me, and I think of an embarrassing moment, I will usually blurt very loud a curse word such as "****" or "****". Other times I will blurt things such as "No', or "Don't", "Don't do it". It is well controlled when around others, although I do find it occurring more on accident at places such as work when I forget others are around (this happens only occasionally, and I usually catch myself as it is coming out, or it will only come out as a low whisper). It is not well controlled in my household, and my wife and kids are well aware of it by this point. My wife jokes "you have a mental problem", but I actually showed her this thread years ago and she understands its just a weird thing I do. She often asks "what were you thinking about" when I blurt, because she knows what triggers it, but often the scenario I was thinking about is really such a minor deal that I feel dumb explaining it so I don't tell her. I have worked as an ER nurse and paramedic for the past 10 years and the death and crazy things I see don't trigger my blurts, it's almost exclusively embarrassing moments / social scenarios.
I do have anxiety and a history of panic attacks (although never been to the doctor for these issues or taken meds). Also have always been told I have ADD and I've always suspected it since I was young but I never was officially diagnosed nor have I taken any prescriptions. Also, as it has been mentioned in here earlier, I too have noticed the blurting is 200% worse during a hangover.
I have not found a way to control it, and it seems to have gotten worse over the years. Some personal details about myself so others can draw correlations, I have a bachelors degree and am starting grad school soon. I have a successful career and stable family. Only my wife, two daughters, and maybe 2 other people know about my blurting. I did do a lot of partying in my teenage years, which included frequent daily use of marijuana (not sure if that triggered this or not). I have not used marijuana since I was a teenager and I take no prescription meds.
Sorry this ended up being longer than I had anticipated, but I hope it helps someone else.
I have had this issue for at least 4-5 years now and I am 28 currently. I usually blurt when I think of any embarrassing moment. They most often occur when I think about a social situation, one that I thought was awkward, or I said the wrong thing, or minor conflicts at work. My main blurt for the past couple years has been is usually "I love babies". Not sure why this is, I worked as a pediatric RN for a couple years, and I do have two daughters, but I don't know why this is what I blurt. If I am in the car on the way to work and I know no one can hear me, and I think of an embarrassing moment, I will usually blurt very loud a curse word such as "****" or "****". Other times I will blurt things such as "No', or "Don't", "Don't do it". It is well controlled when around others, although I do find it occurring more on accident at places such as work when I forget others are around (this happens only occasionally, and I usually catch myself as it is coming out, or it will only come out as a low whisper). It is not well controlled in my household, and my wife and kids are well aware of it by this point. My wife jokes "you have a mental problem", but I actually showed her this thread years ago and she understands its just a weird thing I do. She often asks "what were you thinking about" when I blurt, because she knows what triggers it, but often the scenario I was thinking about is really such a minor deal that I feel dumb explaining it so I don't tell her. I have worked as an ER nurse and paramedic for the past 10 years and the death and crazy things I see don't trigger my blurts, it's almost exclusively embarrassing moments / social scenarios.
I do have anxiety and a history of panic attacks (although never been to the doctor for these issues or taken meds). Also have always been told I have ADD and I've always suspected it since I was young but I never was officially diagnosed nor have I taken any prescriptions. Also, as it has been mentioned in here earlier, I too have noticed the blurting is 200% worse during a hangover.
I have not found a way to control it, and it seems to have gotten worse over the years. Some personal details about myself so others can draw correlations, I have a bachelors degree and am starting grad school soon. I have a successful career and stable family. Only my wife, two daughters, and maybe 2 other people know about my blurting. I did do a lot of partying in my teenage years, which included frequent daily use of marijuana (not sure if that triggered this or not). I have not used marijuana since I was a teenager and I take no prescription meds.
Sorry this ended up being longer than I had anticipated, but I hope it helps someone else.
1 Comments
My behavior is very similar, with just one difference. I don't "blurt" anything out, but rather have some physical reaction, like whipping my head to the side or clinching up my fists/abdomen. Occasionally I will make a noise to go with it, but nothing intelligible.
It's typically triggered by embarrassing or humiliating moment memories. Being bullied in junior high, the dramatic things I used to say, stuff that later just made me look foolish or that I looked like I had an inferior intellect or character.
I often have to explain the "quiet outburst" or try to cover it up. Even the outbursts themselves become an embarrassing thing to remember (triggering an outburst LOL).
History: I am an extremely creative person who has been on several anti-depressant meds (for several years) prior to these outbursts. I also accidentally took a 220V charge to my arm while trying to repair something I thought was not charged. I am a father of four, in my 40s, successful career in Technical Writing, conditions or medical problems other than chronic chemical depression (not emotional).
It's typically triggered by embarrassing or humiliating moment memories. Being bullied in junior high, the dramatic things I used to say, stuff that later just made me look foolish or that I looked like I had an inferior intellect or character.
I often have to explain the "quiet outburst" or try to cover it up. Even the outbursts themselves become an embarrassing thing to remember (triggering an outburst LOL).
History: I am an extremely creative person who has been on several anti-depressant meds (for several years) prior to these outbursts. I also accidentally took a 220V charge to my arm while trying to repair something I thought was not charged. I am a father of four, in my 40s, successful career in Technical Writing, conditions or medical problems other than chronic chemical depression (not emotional).
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