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Embarrasing Thoughts Make Me Blurt Out Things

When I think of an embarrassing moment (whether it be real or imaginary) I will blurt out a swear, or perhaps a sentence like, "I love you (insert name)". I believe I do that as a means to "snap me out of" the moment so as not to re-experience the feelings the embarrassment caused, or causes, or to just end the momentary thought before it completes.
I would say that 50% of the time I blurt out some kind of swears or a sentence with a swear in it. The other 50% I have this habit of saying "I love you (insert ex gf's name)" or some other name. I must interject at this point that I am happily married and have no interest in any past gf's. But for some reason, the one name I usually insert is an ex-gf who I was overly in love with and who did end up dumping me. Which is fine by me now because I have an awesome wife and a wonderful family. And I am not supressing any deep down desires for my ex....believe me on that. When I do this most is when I am by myself and therefore, dealing with the gazillion thoughts that race thru my mind every minute. Sometimes my mind is like a runaway train. And eventually, the thoughts come back to an embarrassing moment, or a situation I make up in my mind that would embarass me, and I blurt something out, I thought out of habit to snap me out of the moment. Sometimes I blurt something out and one of my kids or my wifes hears me and will ask me what I was saying. Most times I can cover up what I said with some kind of excuse about what I was talking about. One time I was in the bathroom and, in the middle of an embarrasing thought, I blurted out, "I hate you!". My wife happened to be walking by the bathroom at that second and heard me and she thought I was referring to her which I wasn't. So we had a big to-do about that. Of course I"m scared to death that I will blurt out my ex-gf's name and she will hear me and she'll freak. It does seem to be worse when I am really stressed. I am not nearly as stressed as I used to be probably because I have learned how to deal with it in many ways including meditation. Thank God for meditation. Best part of my day.

Anyways I'd like to know if this happens to you and if you have any techniques to control these outbursts? Thank you.
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Avatar universal
thank you for posting this. I have struggled with that exact issue for so long. It started when i was in about 2nd or 3rd and they put me in detention for "disrupting" class a few times. Back then it was just sudden throaty noises...I couldn't hear myself doing it and I couldn't control it.  
Then one day it just stopped. Over the years, I noticed my mother would suddenly say things out of nowhere but only while doing housework, computer work or getting herself ready to go out of the house. She will say the first part loud then finish it as a sentence, like she meant to say it but I know she doesn't mean to say these things. She still does it.
I'm not sure when I started to say random words and phrases but I either didn't realize or didn't accept that it was involuntary. I don't want to spend my days covering it up like my mother seems to. I finally had to type into the search bar what I was going through and this forum popped up on top. Now, I hope I am brave enough to get evaluated or find a natural way to get help for this problem.

Also, your wife should be understanding as long as she knows you have tourette's or bipolar.If not, still get help knowing that God is someone you can turn to when others let us down. I know if it turns out I have something like this, my spouse will not understand to the point of putting me down. I just have to pray for strength and long suffering.
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Avatar universal
Damn it feels awesome knowing I'm not slowly losing my mind. Or if I am, I'm not the only one. But now I'm more curious to our shared problem. Why are all of us saying the same things? There has to be a reason we only say we love/ hate something or someone, or just start cussing. Most of us even share the same muscle ticks. Why is this? Do we all share some traits we aren't mentioning? I read that it happens to creative more imaginative people. I'm into photography, writing, play guitar and other string instruments. Im highly comedic, maybe that's some kind of connection.  Does anyone else have any of this stuff in common?   More importantly how can I make this stop? Meditation works sometimes but it more often then not it just gives my mind a chance to go out of control. I really want this to stop. I hate it. It's getting worse. I'm having trouble controlling it in public. At work I've taken to staying away from co-workers because I don't know when it's coming sometimes. As long as I'm active my mind doesn't seem to snap. Only when I'm not focusing. Does that mean I need to be busy in some activity to get through this? What do I do when I'm trying to sleep? Laying in bed saying "I wish, love or hate someone. The 4 hours of sleep I get a night trying to not to think is really getting old. When I wake up I have to goal of just trying not to say any names out loud.
I'm 30 and single so maybe I deep down I have this problem until I fall in love or something but as I'm starting to see from other writers is that it doesn't stop for them. That's probably the worst news I found out.  
I will let someone study me if they could do something to help me with half of the outburst.
At least I'm not the only one. At least I know I'm not going crazy. I so glad I'm not going crazy.
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Avatar universal
I'm not crazy!!! yeahh!! I have the exact same issue. For me it started when I was 20, blurting my ex boyfriend name out of nothing. Then after few years it changed to a different boyfriend name who I really don't miss or think about at all. Later, it changed to mom, yes, to mom, hahahha. It comes sometimes as I hate you, or I'm going to kill you... It happens when I think about an embarrasing situation where I look or feel guilty or stupid. As someone else commented on this chat, I'm a creative person, I'm into design and drawing (not sure if that is related or not). I'm 31 now and happy to know that I'm not alone in this world!!
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Avatar universal
I forgot to say, some other of the phrases I say are: ''I'm going to die'', I'm going to go away'', ''do you love me?'' ''I want to go (insert country name)''. I think all of these reflects that maybe the solution is to face those embarrasing moments by going thru them and forgiving ourselves for being fool or doing something wrong.....
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Avatar universal
I am 53 and just started noticing that I do this about 5 years ago. I do it just before I go to sleep, every time I wake up in the night I say something out loud. ( gets embarrassing on trips when I stay with friends in hotels). I also do it during the day, especially when alone and not working. Sometimes it is a cuss word, sometimes what ever I am thinking about. How can we quit doing it?
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Avatar universal
I am SO happy to find this post!!  It is so encouraging to know that I'm not the only one, that others have my exact symptoms, and that it's beginning to make sense!  I first started noticing myself blurting about 2 years ago.  I thought I was going crazy or was having a mental breakdown or something.  I have no history of anything and have never been on any meds or anything.  I was teaching in a particularly stressful position at the time and was having relationship problems so I related it all to stress.  It would get worse, then reside a little bit.  But then I noticed it even when I wasn't that stressed out.  It seemed to be getting worse.  I was scared I would do it in front of someone, I hadn't yet.  I would always blurt "I love you Dwayne".  Dwayned was a guy that was an awkward acquaintance that I had a strange friendship with, and never dated.  I certainly didn't love him.  I was afraid someone was going to hear me say that and wonder why I was saying I loved him.  I would consciously try to repeat something better whenever it would happen, for example if I had blurted "I love you Dwayne" I would immediately talk to myself, saying "no you don't".  And try to suggest to myself to say something else if I had to say anything at all, like, "this is great" or whatever would be less conspicuous.  But it never worked.  Then I had an epiphany moment.  I realized that whenever I blurted, it was during a time when I was thinking about something I was embarrassed or ashamed of or thought I should have done differently or acted differently concerning.  I realized that I was being a perfectionist and being hard on myself for these situations that were replaying in my mind. So I wonder if mostly perfectionistic and type A people do this blurting stuff. I really identified with the earlier post where the person said it helps to work through these situations by talking to a person about it.  I need to do that.  Or at least start writing it out in my journal, writing about thoughts helps me so much.  I've also noticed that I do it alot more when I'm anxed up on caffeine or brain stimulants like msg or maltodextrin....for some reason those make my mind go in overdrive and I blurt more.  When I get into a blurting season,  I drink a lot of water, go for a hike to pump things out or exercise real hard, and it seems to help put things back to normal.  So for now this Is my road to a cure.... reduce stress with exercise and eating healthy and drinking lots of water, talk to a friend or write out all embarrassing or anxiety causing situations, and stop thinking that I have to be perfect in all situations.
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