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Embarrasing Thoughts Make Me Blurt Out Things
When I think of an embarrassing moment (whether it be real or imaginary) I will blurt out a swear, or perhaps a sentence like, "I love you (insert name)". I believe I do that as a means to "snap me out of" the moment so as not to re-experience the feelings the embarrassment caused, or causes, or to just end the momentary thought before it completes.
I would say that 50% of the time I blurt out some kind of swears or a sentence with a swear in it. The other 50% I have this habit of saying "I love you (insert ex gf's name)" or some other name. I must interject at this point that I am happily married and have no interest in any past gf's. But for some reason, the one name I usually insert is an ex-gf who I was overly in love with and who did end up dumping me. Which is fine by me now because I have an awesome wife and a wonderful family. And I am not supressing any deep down desires for my ex....believe me on that. When I do this most is when I am by myself and therefore, dealing with the gazillion thoughts that race thru my mind every minute. Sometimes my mind is like a runaway train. And eventually, the thoughts come back to an embarrassing moment, or a situation I make up in my mind that would embarass me, and I blurt something out, I thought out of habit to snap me out of the moment. Sometimes I blurt something out and one of my kids or my wifes hears me and will ask me what I was saying. Most times I can cover up what I said with some kind of excuse about what I was talking about. One time I was in the bathroom and, in the middle of an embarrasing thought, I blurted out, "I hate you!". My wife happened to be walking by the bathroom at that second and heard me and she thought I was referring to her which I wasn't. So we had a big to-do about that. Of course I"m scared to death that I will blurt out my ex-gf's name and she will hear me and she'll freak. It does seem to be worse when I am really stressed. I am not nearly as stressed as I used to be probably because I have learned how to deal with it in many ways including meditation. Thank God for meditation. Best part of my day.
Anyways I'd like to know if this happens to you and if you have any techniques to control these outbursts? Thank you.
I would say that 50% of the time I blurt out some kind of swears or a sentence with a swear in it. The other 50% I have this habit of saying "I love you (insert ex gf's name)" or some other name. I must interject at this point that I am happily married and have no interest in any past gf's. But for some reason, the one name I usually insert is an ex-gf who I was overly in love with and who did end up dumping me. Which is fine by me now because I have an awesome wife and a wonderful family. And I am not supressing any deep down desires for my ex....believe me on that. When I do this most is when I am by myself and therefore, dealing with the gazillion thoughts that race thru my mind every minute. Sometimes my mind is like a runaway train. And eventually, the thoughts come back to an embarrassing moment, or a situation I make up in my mind that would embarass me, and I blurt something out, I thought out of habit to snap me out of the moment. Sometimes I blurt something out and one of my kids or my wifes hears me and will ask me what I was saying. Most times I can cover up what I said with some kind of excuse about what I was talking about. One time I was in the bathroom and, in the middle of an embarrasing thought, I blurted out, "I hate you!". My wife happened to be walking by the bathroom at that second and heard me and she thought I was referring to her which I wasn't. So we had a big to-do about that. Of course I"m scared to death that I will blurt out my ex-gf's name and she will hear me and she'll freak. It does seem to be worse when I am really stressed. I am not nearly as stressed as I used to be probably because I have learned how to deal with it in many ways including meditation. Thank God for meditation. Best part of my day.
Anyways I'd like to know if this happens to you and if you have any techniques to control these outbursts? Thank you.
After many many years trying to find the exact search criteria at google, I have come across this forum. It's both weird , and comforting to see so many people with exact the same problem I have.
I have had these 'bouts of saying things out loud whenever remembering about something embarrassing since I was 5. I'm 38 now.
This thing has changed over the years, being the latest one also the longest one, which is exactly what most people here have reported too: "I love you, ".
I didn't really notice I really had a problem until I started saying: "I love you, Agda", whenever feeling embarrassed about something I remember. The problem here is not only the fact that I'm happily married, madly in love with my wife. The problem is that Agda is my wife's sister. Now, I do NOT have any crush on my sister-in-law, but she was my first girlfriend.
I have dated my wife's sister when we were 16, it didn't last long, I got over it after a couple months of heartache, when she dumped me, and I carried on with life.
The thing is, since I dated here, 22 years ago, I acquired this "I love you, Agda" thing, and it never really left me.
So far, my wife hasn't noticed it, although she is very aware that I do have this tourette thing going on, because I mumble many other random things as well. So far I could keep this thing unnoticed, and I'm beginning to think it was a real bad idea to never have told my wife about this "I love you, Agda" damn phrase. Because I can't seem to find a way of telling her, this late, 15 years being married.
I'm scared as hell of one day shouting my sister-in-law's name and ruin everything I have, my married, my family. As I said, my sister-in-law means absolutely nothing to me, not even a tinge of sympathy I have towards her these days. She is this bitter woman, whom likes to blame men for every single bad choice she made in her life.
I've read somebody mention that taking probiotics is a good go. I'll give it a whirl for a couple of months. It does make sense, though, for I have IBS. Both things could be connected.
I have had these 'bouts of saying things out loud whenever remembering about something embarrassing since I was 5. I'm 38 now.
This thing has changed over the years, being the latest one also the longest one, which is exactly what most people here have reported too: "I love you, ".
I didn't really notice I really had a problem until I started saying: "I love you, Agda", whenever feeling embarrassed about something I remember. The problem here is not only the fact that I'm happily married, madly in love with my wife. The problem is that Agda is my wife's sister. Now, I do NOT have any crush on my sister-in-law, but she was my first girlfriend.
I have dated my wife's sister when we were 16, it didn't last long, I got over it after a couple months of heartache, when she dumped me, and I carried on with life.
The thing is, since I dated here, 22 years ago, I acquired this "I love you, Agda" thing, and it never really left me.
So far, my wife hasn't noticed it, although she is very aware that I do have this tourette thing going on, because I mumble many other random things as well. So far I could keep this thing unnoticed, and I'm beginning to think it was a real bad idea to never have told my wife about this "I love you, Agda" damn phrase. Because I can't seem to find a way of telling her, this late, 15 years being married.
I'm scared as hell of one day shouting my sister-in-law's name and ruin everything I have, my married, my family. As I said, my sister-in-law means absolutely nothing to me, not even a tinge of sympathy I have towards her these days. She is this bitter woman, whom likes to blame men for every single bad choice she made in her life.
I've read somebody mention that taking probiotics is a good go. I'll give it a whirl for a couple of months. It does make sense, though, for I have IBS. Both things could be connected.
Wow, speechless.
Been searching for this question on Google for a while, but couldn't find anything for ages. Am completely stunned I have gone from thinking there is nothing that matches my symptoms, to finding pages of posts with the exact issues I am having. I feel relieved that I am not the only one going through this.
I can't really recall when 'it' started for me, but basically I became aware a few years ago that any embarrassing memory was getting a sort of defensive response from my body. If I am alone, that response could be a loud yell of '**** you', or '****' or something like that. Sometimes not a word, just a sound like 'ahhh'. Other times I weirdly say "will you marry me', which is odd considering I am married. Other times "I hate you so much". If alone I will do this really loud, if someone is near by I will whisper or suppress it. I would say it has probably gotten worse, and am not sure what to do about it. I can be perfectly fine, be having a great day, and then drift off into thought until I fall on a negative memory and I blurt something out. Sometimes I might move a hand or an arm as well. At my absolute worst I can say the N and C word together followed by *****. This is so odd to me, as I would never say anything like that out of choice and I don't know where it comes from.
I have been astonished to read that at least one person on this thread has said pretty much everything I do. How can that be, that we are saying the same type of words to do with relationships, the words hate and love, some references to marriage, and also some N references. Its comforting to know but confusing.
I am 34, successful, married with a child, a quality teacher, educated, worldly, a deep thinker, an introvert, an avid reader, loves music etc. I am somewhat of a perfectionist as well.I also have a lot of bad memories, mostly from acting in a way contrary to my natural personality when I drank alcohol or took illicit drugs in my 20s. A lot of the bad memories I guess I try to suppress are from experiences from those times, especially several that stand out for me. However, now it doesn't have to be a really bad memory to cause me to blurt out loud, but just a negative memory, or what my brain perceives as negative, where previously it had to be one of the more troubling parts of my past.
Going forward, I think I am going to have to be open about this with some close members of my family. Talk about the issues, and talk about the memories. Writing them down is another option. I am also looking at health in terms of meditation, exercise, reading, supplements etc to try to do everything I can to look after myself, but while I do feel healthier this problem seems to be getting worse if not better so far. I really am hoping to find something that will help counter it, because it is worrying to be completely fine in all parts of my life, and have this tendency to blurt out words.
I am really open to suggestions, ideas, or feedback and ways forward from here.
Been searching for this question on Google for a while, but couldn't find anything for ages. Am completely stunned I have gone from thinking there is nothing that matches my symptoms, to finding pages of posts with the exact issues I am having. I feel relieved that I am not the only one going through this.
I can't really recall when 'it' started for me, but basically I became aware a few years ago that any embarrassing memory was getting a sort of defensive response from my body. If I am alone, that response could be a loud yell of '**** you', or '****' or something like that. Sometimes not a word, just a sound like 'ahhh'. Other times I weirdly say "will you marry me', which is odd considering I am married. Other times "I hate you so much". If alone I will do this really loud, if someone is near by I will whisper or suppress it. I would say it has probably gotten worse, and am not sure what to do about it. I can be perfectly fine, be having a great day, and then drift off into thought until I fall on a negative memory and I blurt something out. Sometimes I might move a hand or an arm as well. At my absolute worst I can say the N and C word together followed by *****. This is so odd to me, as I would never say anything like that out of choice and I don't know where it comes from.
I have been astonished to read that at least one person on this thread has said pretty much everything I do. How can that be, that we are saying the same type of words to do with relationships, the words hate and love, some references to marriage, and also some N references. Its comforting to know but confusing.
I am 34, successful, married with a child, a quality teacher, educated, worldly, a deep thinker, an introvert, an avid reader, loves music etc. I am somewhat of a perfectionist as well.I also have a lot of bad memories, mostly from acting in a way contrary to my natural personality when I drank alcohol or took illicit drugs in my 20s. A lot of the bad memories I guess I try to suppress are from experiences from those times, especially several that stand out for me. However, now it doesn't have to be a really bad memory to cause me to blurt out loud, but just a negative memory, or what my brain perceives as negative, where previously it had to be one of the more troubling parts of my past.
Going forward, I think I am going to have to be open about this with some close members of my family. Talk about the issues, and talk about the memories. Writing them down is another option. I am also looking at health in terms of meditation, exercise, reading, supplements etc to try to do everything I can to look after myself, but while I do feel healthier this problem seems to be getting worse if not better so far. I really am hoping to find something that will help counter it, because it is worrying to be completely fine in all parts of my life, and have this tendency to blurt out words.
I am really open to suggestions, ideas, or feedback and ways forward from here.
Wow, I am so happy to have come across this thread despite it not being active. I have the same problem because I tend to blurt "I love you (name)" a lot, especially when I'm thinking of an embarrassing moment. Embarrassing thoughts really trigger this "blurting" problem and it only started recently.
I am 24 and a Registered Nurse. I thought the accumulation of stress at work is making me go crazy! I'm afraid this "self-talk" is going to cause me to look crazy if others are around to hear it.
The weird thing is, my Dad does this too and I thought he's crazy! I just thought I got into this habit because I would hear him say it. Potentially that may be the case but the thought that it could somehow be heredity may not seem far fetched in my situation.
Otherwise, I'm trying hard to stop myself from blurting out loud. There's this particular name I blurt out because I care for this person a lot (before), but it was unrequited. To me, I don't love him at all. So when I'm trying to stop myself from blurting out this... I stop myself halfway "I love you...... (my cats name instead)"
But hey, I DO love my cat! Lol
I am 24 and a Registered Nurse. I thought the accumulation of stress at work is making me go crazy! I'm afraid this "self-talk" is going to cause me to look crazy if others are around to hear it.
The weird thing is, my Dad does this too and I thought he's crazy! I just thought I got into this habit because I would hear him say it. Potentially that may be the case but the thought that it could somehow be heredity may not seem far fetched in my situation.
Otherwise, I'm trying hard to stop myself from blurting out loud. There's this particular name I blurt out because I care for this person a lot (before), but it was unrequited. To me, I don't love him at all. So when I'm trying to stop myself from blurting out this... I stop myself halfway "I love you...... (my cats name instead)"
But hey, I DO love my cat! Lol
I do this too when I'm alone and think about an embarrassing moment. Sometimes it's full on shouting if I don't think anyone can hear me. If people are nearby I might just speak or whisper or mutter it. The phrase I say/shout these days is "Hate it!" But I also used to say "marry me" or "I love you" followed by name of ex girlfriend whom I otherwise never think about.
My dad does this too so maybe it's hereditary or I learned it from him.
My dad does this too so maybe it's hereditary or I learned it from him.
Okay... I'm a going to turn 30 this year...
...and like everyone else who has responded to this, I experience the same thing.
My "escape phrase" when getting stuck into an embarrassing thought is usually "I'm going to kill myself" or "I died of cancer" -- really pleasant things to blurt out.
Like everyone seems to agree upon.... its usually its worst when I am alone... and it rarely happens around others.... but occasionally someone may be around to hear, and it can be embarrassing.
I've recently discovered that my sister has the same issue, but with different phrases.
There has to be some reason for this.
What do we all have in common???
The reason why these "blurt out phrases" were chosen for me was...
Jolting up in bed one night after having difficulty breathing and coming to a sudden realization that I was experiencing the effects of smoking.... I actually ended up saying out loud... I'm going to ******* kill myself (in reference to my smoking habit and how it is probably going to kill me) I'm going to die of cancer.
Here are some things that could potentially have messed with my otherwise normal brain.... and check to see if any of these might apply to you.... i know this might seem like a strange list.... but we have to start listing things off in order to figure out what is causing this.... and see what we all have in common. If nothing on my list applies to you, make your own list and see if any others match.
I believe my symptoms first started to develop when I was working at an autobody repair shop.... lots of bad chemicals in the air.
I was also driving a vehicle at that time that had an exhaust leak, so I feel that may have played a role in this.
I lived in my parent(s) basement growing up (and was probably exposed to carbon monoxide regularly from the furnace) and black mold due to moisture.
I feel like hearing in one of my ears diminshed around the same time i began developing symptoms.
Perhaps we are suppressing our memories for some instinctual reason. ...perhaps something related to being under general anesthesia during surgical operations or something.
I smoke cigarettes.... have smoked marijuana on a few occasions in my life.... and I have also smoked salvia once (when I was like 18).
I took the drug bupropion to aid me with depression and help me stop smoking for a while about 7 or 8 years ago.
Fairly consistently, I would drive long distances (3 hr drives) on very little sleep, and would have to continually jerk myself awake to make sure i was not going to crash.
idk guys.... i hope something i brought up matches up with you guys.
This post has given me so much hope.
...and like everyone else who has responded to this, I experience the same thing.
My "escape phrase" when getting stuck into an embarrassing thought is usually "I'm going to kill myself" or "I died of cancer" -- really pleasant things to blurt out.
Like everyone seems to agree upon.... its usually its worst when I am alone... and it rarely happens around others.... but occasionally someone may be around to hear, and it can be embarrassing.
I've recently discovered that my sister has the same issue, but with different phrases.
There has to be some reason for this.
What do we all have in common???
The reason why these "blurt out phrases" were chosen for me was...
Jolting up in bed one night after having difficulty breathing and coming to a sudden realization that I was experiencing the effects of smoking.... I actually ended up saying out loud... I'm going to ******* kill myself (in reference to my smoking habit and how it is probably going to kill me) I'm going to die of cancer.
Here are some things that could potentially have messed with my otherwise normal brain.... and check to see if any of these might apply to you.... i know this might seem like a strange list.... but we have to start listing things off in order to figure out what is causing this.... and see what we all have in common. If nothing on my list applies to you, make your own list and see if any others match.
I believe my symptoms first started to develop when I was working at an autobody repair shop.... lots of bad chemicals in the air.
I was also driving a vehicle at that time that had an exhaust leak, so I feel that may have played a role in this.
I lived in my parent(s) basement growing up (and was probably exposed to carbon monoxide regularly from the furnace) and black mold due to moisture.
I feel like hearing in one of my ears diminshed around the same time i began developing symptoms.
Perhaps we are suppressing our memories for some instinctual reason. ...perhaps something related to being under general anesthesia during surgical operations or something.
I smoke cigarettes.... have smoked marijuana on a few occasions in my life.... and I have also smoked salvia once (when I was like 18).
I took the drug bupropion to aid me with depression and help me stop smoking for a while about 7 or 8 years ago.
Fairly consistently, I would drive long distances (3 hr drives) on very little sleep, and would have to continually jerk myself awake to make sure i was not going to crash.
idk guys.... i hope something i brought up matches up with you guys.
This post has given me so much hope.
GOD!!!!
You guys have no idea about how happy I am to find you.
I'm 23 years old, female, an engineer with love for the violin and culinary.
So I noticed these symptoms earlier on this year.
And it's so freaky how we say the same things! I usually scream out an ex boyfriend's name like "I hate you so and so" or "I love you so and so"
Which isn't true because I really don't give a damn about him.
Like everyone else this happens when I drift off into rather embarrassing thoughts.
The other day I was mopping with my headphones on, my mother said I muttered "I hate you" other times "I'm going to scream" or "I wanna die" or "**** you" etc etc
I should probably add that indeed I've got a wanting attention span, I tend to procrastinate alot and I think I'm currently dealing with a lot of anxiety in my life regarding a big project I haven't completed yet.
I find that my blurting reduces on times when I actually get a lot of work done so maybe it might help to jot down the causes of anxiety in your life right now and proactive steps to remedy them.
When you start taking those steps the blurting will probably reduce.
But goddamnit someone should find us a solid diagnosis and tangible remedies no?
You guys have no idea about how happy I am to find you.
I'm 23 years old, female, an engineer with love for the violin and culinary.
So I noticed these symptoms earlier on this year.
And it's so freaky how we say the same things! I usually scream out an ex boyfriend's name like "I hate you so and so" or "I love you so and so"
Which isn't true because I really don't give a damn about him.
Like everyone else this happens when I drift off into rather embarrassing thoughts.
The other day I was mopping with my headphones on, my mother said I muttered "I hate you" other times "I'm going to scream" or "I wanna die" or "**** you" etc etc
I should probably add that indeed I've got a wanting attention span, I tend to procrastinate alot and I think I'm currently dealing with a lot of anxiety in my life regarding a big project I haven't completed yet.
I find that my blurting reduces on times when I actually get a lot of work done so maybe it might help to jot down the causes of anxiety in your life right now and proactive steps to remedy them.
When you start taking those steps the blurting will probably reduce.
But goddamnit someone should find us a solid diagnosis and tangible remedies no?
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