kids

[lucylocket2]

I don't think I am posting this on the right one, but maybe you all can help me. I have two daughters, one is 9 the otheris 10. I have spoiled them for rotten , not in buying them things, but cleaning up after them. Now, I am at the point of losing my mind. They won't do anything! Their rooms look like a bomb went off! I have tried numerous things in trying to get them to clean up, but with no success. I thought I was being a great mommy when they were little by cleaning up their mess.BIG MISTAKE! I am paying for it now. they will start cleaning, then they are so overwhelmed with the mess they start slowing down till eventualy they arn't moving at all. I have gone in their and cleaned it to give them a fresh start. All they had to do was keep it up. They will have clean laundry in the floor, getting stepped on till I have to wash them again. Please give me some other idea's that might make it fun for them or something. Or any other idea's you great mom's have done to raise CLEAN kids. I have messed up big time, now I need to fix it. I really thought I was doing the right thing. So, mom's learn from my mistakes.Please help me before I go crazy! I can't stand the mess!!

[Adevotee]

If they really cherish their things, you could go in with garbage bags and start "throwing" their things in the "garbage". Then take the bags and hide them until they can learn to keep their rooms clean. You could then go in everyday for say a week or so, letting them know that you will be doing so and that if there is ANYTHING on the floor, it will be thrown in the garbage!

This may or may not work, it's just my opinion and what I would possibly do in your situation.

[cugirl]

If I wouldnt clean my room when I was little my mom told me I wasnt appreciative of the things that her and my dad worked hard for.  She also threatened to throw my stuff out in the yard and set it on fire.  I got moving and started keeping my room clean.  I know how my mom is and she was serious about throwing stuff in the yard....she wasnt using it to scare me...she really would of took all my stuff except a matress and put it in the yard, if thats what she needed to do to get threw to me. But I know when my mom means business and she meant bussiness....so I started keeping my room clean.

[lucylocket2]

thanks for your idea, but I have tried it. They don't cherish their stuff. Sad, I know. It might work now, I have forbid the grandparents from buying more. They try to do the pitty party on them for more junk. I will try it again.I just watch all the hard earned money go out the door and it breaks my heart.

[who_is_this]

Be sure they are clear on the rules.  Put them up in plain sight so no one can claim they didn't know what to do.  Post the consequences, like losing the clothes, toys, or other items found on the floor.  Losing priveleges if need be.  

Then stick to your word.  They continue to do it because they can get away with it.  When they're down to one outfit to wear, you can bet they'll put it in the laundry.

[cugirl]

Thats a good one...I bet they wont want to wear one outfit to school everyday....and schools starting here this week, dont know when it starts for you.  But I know its a big deal to go school shopping and if you dont take them or if you already have and just give them one outfit and say alright this is what you have to wear to school since you lost all your privilages.  Then tell them if they want that one outfit clean they have to put it in the washing machince, dryer, etc.  Ive been doing laundry since I knew my colors.  I would help separate them, then when I got tall enough I started doing everyones on my own.

[tydydaisy13]

My daughter is 11 now and is a neat freak BUT she didn't always used to be.  I did the same thing - cleaned up for her (and her friends) and then when I started asking for a LITTLE help, I was looked at like I had two heads!  It was a struggle (though a short one) because she was put in her room, NO BOOKS (her favorite thing), NO TOYS, and she had to stay there until the clothes were CLEANED UP.  That meant NO TV and NO PHONE too.  All she could do was eat & use the bathroom.  It actually took a few days but I would check on her (acting all happy and interested) and tell her she was doing well and could start earning back her BOOKS & toys just as soon as the clothes were done.  I ended up really throwing away some toys to really get her motivated, but she knew I meant business.

Just remember not to make any threats you wont follow through with.  They will ALWAYS remeber that!  So go ahead and make the threats and FOLLOW THROUGH!!  They WILL catch on, in time!!

GOOD LUCK!!

[Red_Rose]

I think thats the most important point that was said above. DO NOT make threats u wont keep. My eldest is 3 and I try to get him to tidy up but if I say Im gonna do something and then dont he picks up on it and look how young he is! At that age, 9 and 10? The have had say 7 8 years to learn how to run rings round u lol! I think maybe u could either do like above, really throw something u have the heart to but that means loads to them so they know its never coming back and say the same will be done with more if they dont start sorting themselves out, or when they're at school or out somewhere take everything out and hide it, I mean everything, maybe leave the clothes and make them pick it up, and tell them they can earn back the stuff by keeping it tidy everyday they get 1 thing bk. If the mess up again they get a warning and then if still nothing is done they lose one more thing. Rules on the wall would be good too like said above. Maybe u could do a sticker chart (they may still be young enough lol) and when they get a certain number of good stickers or whatever grams and gramps will buy them a toy lol! or clothes whatever (Im still in baby mode sorry!)

let us know what happens and what u decide to do. Maybe these ideas will get u thnking of a new idea! Im sure inspired!!

o and GOOD LUCK!

[lucylocket2]

Hey! Everybody has great idea's. Right now as I write this, my girls are working. I keep going in there and checking. I don't know if this is good, but they are working together. They aare doing one room at a time. They tried to quit. I walked in there and they were putting their brat's(doll's) in the doll house they built out of a box. BUSTED! They said " We are organizing our doll's" . What- ever!! So, I instructed them to put them in one spot and clean up the rest of the room then they could "organize" their doll's. The bait I 'm using is I won't call the gymnastic's place and enroll them if the room's arn't clean. If the work isn't done before 5 then no class all year. I MEAN IT!!! So far so good. I'll let u all know if it get's done. Thank's for all the great idea's! p.s. I've tried the chart and it didn't work for me. I thought it was a great idea though.

[mum2beagain]

I think taking thier stuff away from them is a good idea, put their things in clear plastic bins so they can see it but not have it, each day they have done what you asked and have tidied up let them choose one thing to have back. On the days they haven't tidied up you choose one thing out of their box to take to the charity shop for "the chidren who will appreciate these things more". You definately need to get grandparents etc to stop buying them things until you get this sorted too. Best of luck.