Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

Mental Problems/Guess I lost it

As some of you know I have not been doing good at all. I know I wrote a lot about the things going on and how stressed out and depressed I have been feeling. Things were falling apart and everything was lousy. Well everything just seemed to pile up on me and I lost it. I know maybe you were expecting a ton of details why I have been absent and what happened while I was gone and all this. Sorry to disapoint you but I dont know. My memory well it was always bad but it got really bad. Im not even sure why I left. I guess I got lost in my own world maybe. I dont know. I wish I had the answers. Im not even sure how I made it through all that. I guess I did or well then I wouldnt be here at all. Im still not well. I space out a lot. Feel like Im in and out of it. Feels like Im not all here. I know this sounds crazy. It really does. This is another really hard thing for me to talk about. I guess this really makes me feel I am crazy. Like how could I forget what I did and stuff. Did I just lose it? I dont know. Stuff like this happened before but I think this was like the worst. I call it zoning out. I dont know. So I dont have an answer. I dont know what I was doing for most of it. I remember some of it breifly but just not much of it. Like I said I was out of it. I have no explimation. Oh and I know the 1st thing people are going to say, see a shrink. Yeah I know I need one. I needed one then too. I dont have one. I dont have insurance. I cant afford to see another doctor. Its to expencive. Aughhhh. When it rains it pours and thunders and lightnings. Still I am doing better then i was or I probably still wouldnt be able to be here. But I am here right now. I wanted to be then too but I couldnt. Wasnt functioning. Maybe I forgot how to come here too. Not sure. Like I said wasnt myself. So really I just wrote this to update everyone and hoping for a bit of support. Im still stuck in a situation where Im in the house all the time. And I dont go out. Maybe it didnt matter. Id probably forget most of it anyway. Seems like I forgot it all anyway. My memory is awful. My mental health is awful. Everything really ***** right now. Things got to hard. to bad. to much, So I guess I just lost it. Thanks for listening.
55 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
Avatar universal
Just wanted to say hey to both of you and hope you are doing ok right now. I know its been a long time since I wrote so thought I would say hi. Also to anyone who is reading this post as well.

I guess Im as good as Im going to get with all the things thats happened lately. So Im not really great but Im not where I was when I was gone either. Dont really have much to say to this right now. So talk later.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Innerchild09, Sorry that you are really down right now. I'm glad you are still on this site because I wasn't sure if you would be or if you were but were upset because I haven't been here in awhile. I hope that things will be better for you soon. I hope that you feel better as well.

Nikodicreta, Hope that you had a good time being away from home. It's nice to be back then. I'm glad you are back on the site too. Hope you are doing well. And thank you for the good energy.

As for me I've been down. I got into an arguement with a friend. So I'm worried that things won't work out. So I have been really stressed over that. Today I decided to stay home and try to relax. I'm always out so I needed some time at home. Yesterday I decided to go for a nice bike ride. I brought water with me because it's really hot out right now. So I needed plenty of water. It helped clear my mind. Iv'e been having a lot of thoughts that just keep on and it was starting to bother me. So I think going out for a bike ride cleared my mind. Just what I needed. So I have'nt heard back from my friend yet so she might be mad. Still I hope she picks up so we can make up. I don't like when these things happen. Sorry the events are out of order. I just started typing what my brain thought of first and that is how it turned out. I guess my mind isn't to organized either right now. Oh well. So that's what is going on with me. Hope everyone else is doing ok.
Helpful - 0
1530171 tn?1448129593
Hey girls.
I haven't been around for a while. I was away for a course.
It was great and very interesting. It is always good to come back home though.
Sorry innerchild09 to hear you're not doing so well. I'm going to send some "good"
energy your way. You know, this really works! As long as you're open to receive it.

Amylove21, it's nice to know that you're O.K. and that you are back here to post.
It's also nice for both of you to keep in touch this way.
I'm sending you too some good energy.

Do you guys have a Spirit guide or an Angel that you can call for help?
If you don't have one, just ask for one. And wait for a sign. It will happen!
But only if you are open to this and you're paying attention. That's the only criteria!
So try it and have fun doing it!
Take care!
Blessings,
Nikodicreta
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Its ok if you have been gone awhile. Glad to know you didnt forget me. That is good to know. I havent been here much lately either. So havent really been checking that often.

Things are really lousy for me right now. Im down and depressed a lot. Seems like everything wants to go wrong in my life.

Anyway I hope you are doing ok right now and have fun being busy. Hope you arent overwelmed by it. Hope we can talk soon.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wow I realize I haven't been on here in awhile. Been super busy agian. My scedual is fine. Just there's not enough time in the day I don't think. Friends and family and trying to squeeze some alone time in as well. Time I need just for myself. I like keeping busy but sometimes it gets really busy and I don't even have time to come here and see if you responded to what I last wrote which was ages ago.

Hope that things are going ok. I'm not even sure if you are still coming on here or if you left agian. I don't know when I will be on agian. I will try to be soon to see if you wrote anything. I am about to go to bed now because tomorrow I have to go somewhere agian. So I'm in for a busy day. I will try to check in at least if I can't post. I just wanted to make sure you didn't think I forgot about you because I didn't. I was just really busy.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey sorry havent been doing well,. Been in bed a lot. So wanted to respond quickly for now.

Hope you are doing good and hope your scedual isnt messed up.

Sorry that your parents are arguing. Thats hard. I know when I was a teen I had to listen to that. Seems like such a long time ago now.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey everyone. I've been really busy. So hope you are doing ok. Sorry about your mother wanting to leave and that it scared you. I hope that things will be ok for you. Hope you feel better soon and that things start to improve.

So I am ok right now. I was busy and stuff. So today I didn't go out actually I ended up taking a nap. It was supposed to be a nap. Instead it was more sleep. So I was in bed most of the day. Now I'm a bit bummed because it might mess up my scedual. I really don't want to get my days and nights mixed up. Iv'e been there before. I don't mind like on a Friday night or Saturday night staying out until 12 or 1 but other then that I want to be asleep at night not in the day because now I might not be tired until 4 in the morning and then that interfears with my daily life. So I don't know.

Oh great sounds like another arguement is starting. Should'nt they be in bed? Hope that I get to talk to you both soon.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks for replying. My future is uncertain but I am doing better right now. I dont know if mom is going to leave or not but if she does then she does and I dont know what Ill do but wait and see what my family does, And freaaaak too. So thats about all. But right now I am doing ok.

I am so glad that you had a great time on your trip. Im really happy for you. Hope that you are doing ok too. Talk to you sometime soon.
Helpful - 0
1530171 tn?1448129593
Hey innerchild.
I'm back and I'm truly sorry about your situation.
Would you consider to go back to "Dialogue with "Illness"?
There's something that happens in this "exchange" that may offer
you some slightly different perspective in dealing with your issues.

The song "Courage" or "Come out and play"
@ www.youtube.com/watch?v=PwoUM8ETFfk      ( by my friend Justin Hines.)
Having listened to this song over 50 times, I still get tears in my eyes.
Hope you can listen to it.

Could you think of a couple things that may make things better in your life?
And if you do, would you share them in your next post, for other members' benefit?

We had a nice trip to Toronto and the training was awesome!
I've been practicing and applying my new "stuff" and it is simply extraordinary.
More about this another time!
gtg now!
Hope you feel better very soon!
Blessings,
Nikodicreta
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Ok well things are back to being super lousy. My internet was off for several days. So I couldnt make it online.

Oh mom is thinking about leaving me. I dont know what will happen if she does, She wants to move close to her school she is going to. Its ot good. I wish I didnt need her. I wish I could just say bye. But she knows Ill cry for her agian cuz without her theres no one. So she can keep me this way. If she leaves then I dont know what will happen. I cant take this. Thought you all deserve an update.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey there. And yesterday is the answer. Thank you.

Thats ok I was actually busy myself. I had a great time out yesterday getting clothes and stuff. It was nice. So I have been busy lately. It was so nice getting out.

Sorry you had a bad dream. Hope you got some more sleep and with no nightmares.

Thats cool. I hope your family thing went great. That ok I guess we were both busy.

Talk soon.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm really sorry that you are down over fathers day and over your birthday. Not sure when it is but happy birthday. Hope it goes ok.

I have been busy. I'm doing ok. I actually woke up from a lousy dream so I thought I would check this since I had a bit of time. Think I am going to go back to bed now.

Hope everyone is doing ok. I don't know if I'll be on later or not because I am doing a family thing. So I will be busy agian.

You take care too.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Amylove21, Sounds like things are pretty lousy now. Im sorry that you are down and that things are stressful. Not sure about the phone thing. Anyway yeah my parents used to argue too and it was stressful to listen to. So I know how you feel. Of course thats a long time ago.

Im pretty down about fathers day coming. Plus a birthday is coming up. So 2 things that are depressing. Things arent really great right now. Im doing pretty lousy still.

Nikodicreta, hope that you have a good time there.

I hope I can talk to both of you soon also anyone else who sees this and once to join in.


Take care.
Helpful - 0
1530171 tn?1448129593
Hey everyone.

Tomorrow I'm going to Toronto for more Reiki training (level 2).
I'll be away for a few days, so I thought that we try once again the Healing Energy
exercise that I posted on May 26th here.
Anyone reading this post is encouraged to participate, as the more people involved.
the more powerful it is. With our  intention we shall send Healing Energy to amylove
and then innerchild. Should anyone have another person that can use Healing,
please post your details here, so we can help those people as well!
Some of you may be skeptical, however, just give a try with an open mind and open heart!
So please take a moment, read the post from May 26 a couple times and then intend and visualize all this happening!
God Bless You All!
Nikodicreta
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am so sorry that you are worried about your future and that your mother is upsetting you a lot. Sounds like you have been having a really hard time. I hope that things are better. I don't know if you have been online since the 13th or not. I actually don't have a lot of time to write at this time. Some stuff is going on.

Yeah I figured out what was going on. I guess the payment was late. So the phone was off. But the weird thing is it called out but it wasnt actually reached to the person. Yet I heard it ring but it was'nt connected. It was weird. Maybe a weird glitch with the phone or something. It's back on now. So that's what happened.

Today isn't all that great. I didn't sleep good. Plus mom and dad were fighting agian. I wanted to go out but I couldn't today. So I'm stressed out mostly because of them. Allthough I might be going to a movie I hope so. I don't know if the plan will pan out but I am supposed to get to go see a movie. I'm waiting for my friend to call. She was supposed to call at 7 but she hasn't so now I think she decided to go with someone else or is backing out on me.

Hope that you are doing better then you were.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Nikodicreta, Hi its nice to hear from you. I understand you would be worried about what would happen to your brother. Hopefully someone can help him but I hope things will be ok though and your dad will be around for awhile. Thats hard that he doesnt want to get out andf stuff. I know for me I want to get out but I jsut cant. I am really shy though. But I still want to go places. Thats good that he knows some stuff. Sometimes people who have mental chalanages can really be smart. Its kind of weird that you picked now to mintion him only because I mintioned my moms ex husband. hes mentally challanged too. Yet he is really smart and knowlageble in other ways. I know that his family didnt think he would make it on his own but he actually lives in his own apartment and he takes care of himself. he does have a relative as his payee and sometimes helps but he can do a lot himself which is great.

I know that Im not that but I dont have skills and cant take care of myself so hes actually able to do something I cant do. So to be honest Im worried about whats going to happen to me when my mom is gone. Im really scared of my future, but the thing is I dont have oppertunity to learn what I need to. So Im kinda stuck here in this situation. So I understand. It is so scary.

Amylove21, Yes it can be frustrating at times because I never know what shes going to do and sometimes she will have an idea and do it right away and go with it then later change her mind. So she makes descisiouns to fast.

Sorry that you are down today. Hmm not sure why you havent heard from your friends. Maybe they are just busy. Not sure. Hope that you hear from someone soon. Maybe you will feel better then and more relaxed. Sorry that you are having paranioa. Thats really lousy. I dont actually know from experiance but my mom has a lot of it and Ive heard it growing up. Probably one of the few things I did learn about moms issues.

to anyone who cares, Well everything is awful. Mom was really mean to me yesterday and we ended up in an arguement. It was awful. Plus Im scared Im going to lose it agian because I am becoming really stressed out like I was before. And help isnt avaliable so nothing I can do. All I know is I hope I dont lose it this time. Im trying to hold on. I really am. Than today mom wouldnt leave me alone. I wanted to avoid her she made it impossible. And she yelled at me a lot today. Then my mood was shot by the time I escaped her demands and yelling. So then she asked why Im in a bad mood when she knows why. I say cuz what you did. She thinks its no big deal I guess. Nothing is going right. I am falling agian.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
innerchild, That must be frustrating with your mom always changing her mind about things. Seems like it would be hard to have to deal with. Glad that him being there isn't a bad thing for you. Yes it does sound complicated when someone constantly changes their mind about it. Hope that you are doing well right now.

Nikodicreta, Hi first of all. It's ok not everything has to be super serious or anything. So it's fine. Sorry that your brother has problems and that he doesnt like to get out much. I guess it's not as bad if you are ok with the situation being inside. Thats good that he knows stuff too despite him being how he is. Hope that someone can help him out if something happens hope nothing does but in case.

So I'm a bit down. Haven't heard from any of my friends today which is really unusual. So I'm not sure whats going on. Maybe I really need to stay in today. Still I am a bit bummed plus a bit paranoid thinking they aren't able to call and they are'nt getting my calls. I don't know what is going on. I just hope I hear from someone soon or I reach someone.
Helpful - 0
1530171 tn?1448129593
Hey girls!
Nothing too serious this time to post. Just saying hi!
And to comment that it's so nice that you exchange so much
and in such a genuine and friendly way. Good for both of you!
By the way my brother stays home all the time. He's moderately
mentally challenged. he's a bit conscious of his condition and that
makes him shy away from any potential social situation.
Like he'll go to the corner store to buy something, but that's all.
He feels safe at home.
He's smart in many things and this surprises some people.
Politics, sports, world news, he's very well informed.
I don't know what's going to happen when Dad passes on.
It saddens me when I think about it sometimes. They live in South Europe.
So far away, but I'll be visiting them in August with my wife. That will be good for all of us.
Anyway, it's nice that you're both feeling O.K.
Blessings
Nikodicreta

  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thats good that you are in a good mood. Im glad you got to see your family and then got to go out with one of your friends. Thats good. Its ok if your busy. I know you cant make it on here everyday and its ok.

Im ok right now. Didnt really do much but yeah today was ok.

And I guess its ok. It doesnt bother me if hes here or not. So I was just talking about it. For mom I guess its good sometimes. Still she changes her mind like the weather. One minute they are friends, then they are back together, then they are off shes dont with him. Then back to friends. Then shes done with him. And it just goes back and forth mostly between friends and not friends with ocational they are back together agian. They even thought about marrage which is totally crazy and I am not sure Id be happy with that. But then he backs out or she does or both do. The whole thing is just complicated. I dont really get it.

And yeah it is completely awful.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
So I'm actually in a good mood today. I was doing a family thing yesterday. Today I went out to eat with one of my friends. Not the ones who I go with out all the time but the one who understands me but is sometimes really busy. Shes one of the best friends I have. One of the best people I know out of my friends. So today is a great day. So was yesterday. I was busy with that and some other stuff so I wasn't online. I hope things are ok with you.

That guy coming over is that a good thing or bad? I guess maybe it was just an event that happened. Maybe good for your mom. Not sure. Sorry you got stuck in the house agian. I hope that you get to go out soon. I'm sure you need this time to go out and do things. I hope that you get to agian soon. Not going out being in all the time must be awful. I know I say that a lot but I guess I feel bad for you over that. I know I go crazy if I'm inside the house for a few days. So I can't imagine what you are going through being stuck in the house all the time.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Its ok its how it is. Nothing I can do to change it. Its the life Ive been dealt I guess. Mom is grouchy sometimes and she yells and stuff. Maybe Im just getting in the way.

I am so sorry that you are not feeling good right now. I hope you feel better soon.

So my moms friend who used to be her husband but then they didnt talk for a super long time who then became her friend then went to boyfriend then friend and its off and on agian. Not my father or anything. I dont know if anymore remembers but my dad is gone unfortantly. But this person mom was with before she met my dad. Well they are friends now. So this guy is over. Mom is up and down when it comes to everything. Anyway its really complicated like everything else in my life so I dont really know how to explain it any better then I did. So thats all that is going on today. Mom was out I was in the house. Nothing new there. So guess thats all.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Sorry that your mother was groucy towards you and that things are back to being not so good. I was hoping things would continue to be good.

For me I did'nt go anywhere today because I haven't been feeling all that good. So I'm having a lousy day right now. Also I am stuck at home because I don't feel good so I'm bumbed and I am feeling lousy right now. I am feeling a bit better but I still feel lousy. So really nothing is going on with me right now. Except that. Hope you don't mind me complaining about how I am feeling. I just wanted to see if you posted anything yet. So I am actually going to get off here and lay down. I might be back later today I don't know.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey its ok weather theres a lot going on or not you can still talk. Its nice talking to you. Anyway Im glad your doing good. Its still to bad you cant talk about your problems with them. I dont really have anyone I can talk to except mom and here I guess. Yeah I had an awsome day that day.

Well things are back to normal agian. Mom was grouching yesterday. So looks like things are back to blah agian. not a shock. I saw it coming. Today was ok I guess. Wow it looks like my post is going to be short too. Im sure half of what I say is boring anyway because either its stress or nothing is going on. Thats how it is in my life. Either mom is yelling at me or some other junk or Im not doing anything. Except for the exception of going out once in awhile. So thats all thats going on with me right now.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
So thought I would update. Friday I managed to stay in. Yesterday I went out agian, So I was gone all night so I didn't come online. Still I wanted to update and tell you whats going on. So things are great with my friends. I still have my doubts but I just don't think I could just leave anyway. I just won't talk to them about my emotional problems I guess. I'm doing good right now. Hope to hear from you soon. Not sure if you are busy or what. Hope that you're ok and not having more problems with your mind. I hope you are doing good right now and having a great day. I will probably check the computer tomorrow. Maybe later today I don't know. It depends on what I am doing later today. Talk soon.
Helpful - 0
You must join this user group in order to participate in this discussion.

You are reading content posted in the mental health chats Group

Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.