Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

Wow I was really remembered.. Not

So just felt like I needed to talk a bit. Sometimes you might find my posts or rants. So not a question. Just needed to let this out.

So if you read my previous post before about my uncle passed away last July. So anyway its been pretty hard after that. So then the other day Mom hands me a copy of some memorial book that everyone wrote in. To say their final words and stuff. Say their byes or say memories stuff like that. I was like wow to see it but it also made me emotional seeing it on paper. But what made me more emotional is my family wrote in it and even mom did. And I could have too. IF SOMEONE TOLD ME!!! no one bothered to tell me about it.And had I known I would have wrote in it. It would have been nice to say my goodbyes too. But no. No one cared enough to tell me about this so I could write in it too. Even my cousin whos on the other side of the world knew and had something in it. But no one told me. So its nice to be remembered. Not. No one remembered me. Even mom got remembered. No one thought about me at all. So Im really upset about this. Anyway thanks for listening anyone who does.
4 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
Avatar universal
Sorry I was just needing to vent. I felt pretty upset cuz of what was going on feeling left out. So just needed to vent some. Im ok now though.  It hurt but Im over it. I would have responded sooner but busy with other stuff going on. Anyway thanks for listening. Hope you have a good day.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I think you need to try to evaluate this in a different fashion.  it is normal to only think of you in a situation/time like this.  What you need to remember is that there were other people involved.  You cannot control other people, you cannot control how they feel or what they feel at times like this, or ever for that matter.  You just can't.  

Yeah, that stinks.  Family deaths cause the entire range of emotions.  Depression, fear, aloofness, sorrow, .... all of those and then some.  It does stink that you were not though of regarding this, but you can hold onto that thought for the rest of your life, or you can realize that you had thoughts, still do regarding the departed, and whether they are in print or not are valid and are yours 100%.  Nobody can take that away from you.  You can also say to whomever started the book, 'I wish I could have been included."

Not that it will change anything.  What has happened has happened, and you cannot change that.  Remember your feelings surrounding this.  Be able to take these feelings into consideration to making decisions in the future.  You'll be better able to understand this perspective.... you'll know what it is like to have not been included.  That doesn't mean you dwell on this..... dwelling changes nothing.  Just accept it for what it is.  Even you said that you don't think it was on purpose.  Recognize that, and let go..... realize that you too have forgotten something in the past and will probably forget in the future.  Recognize how it feels to have been forgotten, then move forward.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
The book is finished. I guess theres copies of it. All the words are printed on the pages. So I cant go back and add my thoughts. Yeah just saw it yesterday. I didnt even know they were making this book. Mom did cuz she had her words in it. I didnt know til we got one. Then I saw it.

No I dont think they did it on purpose. Just think they forgot to tell me. Unfortantly it makes me feel like that I wasnt important enough to remember to tell me about it so I could put something in it.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Can you not write in it now?  Had you not seen the book until just recently?  I don't know anything about your family dynamics, so I'll throw this out there as a hunch.  I can almost assure you that this oversight was just that, an oversight.

I don't know why anyone would purposely do this... it just doesn't make a lot of sense.  Deaths in the family affect different people in different ways.  I cannot tell you all of the things that were said and then later "forgotten" around the time of my father's death.
Helpful - 0
You must join this user group in order to participate in this discussion.

You are reading content posted in the mental health chats Group

Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.